The Golden Gazette- Season 3-1
Russians take their military to a whole new level!
Wow, the Russia is really improving, it's armies have gone into the millions. Other countries have developed a tactical weapon that can melt metal, burn ice, and force tanks to run or die a burning death. They call it a flame thrower. "It's better to live for something then to die for them shtenkin people" as said by the awesome general and amazing war leader Ashley Littlejohn. Those filthy Germans better run now!
What you see above is the R2D2 model "Flamer". The infamous Thomas Myers invented it. He was known to make kids run around the football field while riding behind in a golf cart and shouting for them to go faster
World V.S Germany
The entire world is uniting together to fight the force that wants world domination! Germany. The Germans have been developing a hidiously big and painfull bomb known at the time as Social Media Networking. (Aka The SMN) and the world is afraid to even imagine the impact it will make to the world rotation. Causing imminent death.
Russia took over Serbia!
After the assassination of duke( see Duke is dead) Russia instantaneously rushed in and took over Serbia. Which didn't like its new place in government.
Negative effects caused by nationalism.
Due to the rising popularity of a trend called nationalism, the amount of countries being token over went sky high
Duke is Dea
When the duke was shot by a Serbian student. The world was shattered. Just like the glass in his car. He was getting into a car when the student ran up and shot him in point blank range. His family was outraged. But one child was giddy with relief," Finally, I can go and marry Gertrude" he kept shouting while dancing over his fathers dead body. When questioned , the only thing he would say is ,"He said ' Over my dead body' " and then the kid would laugh maniacally
That's all folks
Between the death of the duke, rising nationalism, and militarism. It's no surprise we have a slaughterhouse here! That's all for today...............
All hail Littlejohn