The "Bard"eaux

Home of the Milk Shake-speare

"A Dinner and a Show"

At our establishment we have thy wide assortment of food thee shall love, including "Hamlet and Eggs" ($16.03) and the "Milk Shake-speare" ($15.64). We also have plays by Shakespeare, the man himself, (such as A Midsummer Nights Dream and Othello) that are held with every afternoon meal.

"Cursed be he that doesn't like our food"

Hamlet and Eggs

Julius Cesear Salad

Orange Juliet

Alls Well That Ends Wellington

MacBetharoni and Cheese

Spinach Romeoli

And lastly, our famous Milk Shake-speare

Our top staff ("trained" by Shakespeare himself):


One of our finest chefs, who is expected to get the business and property over time.


Our youngest chef, at age 11, is only a little bit on the side of dead.


A great waiter, alas she has a somewhat tragic life, and nobody seems to record her wit and wisdom.

"Our food is to die for"

Frequently Asked Questions

Is your food literally to die for?

It is to die for, but you shouldn't literally die. There was one incident where a woman appeared to have died and her lover killed himself to be with the woman. Shortly after that the woman was fine, but she killed herself to be with her lover. It had nothing to d with our mouthwatering food. But In the end, there was a lot of paperwork to be filled out.

What makes your Milk Shake-speare better than other milk shakes?

First off, it has a cool name. You can't go wrong with a little word play. Secondly, we use the finest ingredients in making the final product, including similes and metaphors.

Are we "To be or not to be" reviewed?

We beseech thy good review. "Do you bite your thumb at us, sir?" or do you beseech more delicious food. Give suggestions to us on how to improve our service! We can "laugh it off" so don't be afraid to say something. We appreciate your reviews and beseech a good one! (But your review will never be as good as the Milk Shake-speare.)

We complete thy food desires, so thy shall pay us a visit!

Location: Stratford-upon-Avon (birthplace of Shakespeare himself)

Phone: 711-523-1616

Owners: Landry L and Tobey M