Healthy Relationships vs. Unhealthy Relationships
Trust and Support
Shared responsibility - making family/relationship decisions together, mutually agreeing on a distribution of work which is fair to both partners. If parents, the couple shares parental responsibilities and acts as positive, non-violent role models for the children.
Negotiation and fairness - being willing to compromise, accepting change, and seeking mutually satisfying solutions to conflict.
Non- Threatining Behaviour
Non-threatening behavior - talking and acting in a way that promotes both partners' feelings of safety in the relationship. Both should feel comfortable and safe in expressing him/herself and in engaging in activities.
SIGNS OF UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS
Using coercion and threats: Making and/or carrying out threats of hurting you; threatening to leave you, threatening to commit suicide or report you to welfare; making you drop charges; making you do illegal things.
Using intimidation: Making you afraid by using looks, actions, gestures; smashing things; destroying your property; abusing pets; displaying weapons.
Using emotional abuse: Putting you down; calling you names; playing mind games; humiliating you; making you feel guilty; making you think you're crazy; making you feel bad about yourself.
Minimizing, denying and blaming: Making light of the abuse and not taking your concerns about it seriously; saying the abuse didn't happen; shifting responsibility for abusive behavior, saying you caused it.
Abusing authority: Treating you like a servant; making all big decisions; acting like the "master of the castle"; being the one to define roles in the relationship.