Teshuva with Love
Rav. Bensoussan
Teshuva lets us live outside the realm of time and space. We get to rewrite and improve the movie of our life, when done out of love it takes a sin and it doesnt just forgive it turns it into a MITZVA (teshuva out of love: how did i do that for some1 who loves me so much how was i capable to do that i have to redo that)
If this gift doesnt highlight how much hashem loves us, nothing does. Hashem didnt make us his angels He made us His children! He gives us the demonstration of how much he adores us that He manipulates the laws He Himself made for this wold! Time and space, memories and facts.
The true essence of Yom Kipur is reigniting the true love between us and our Aba. Because the trial we get is being handled by our own Aba! We have the power to demonstrate our love for Him so that He in return helps us get back to were we should be.
There was once a very rich guy who did not get along with his son. They barely spent time together, and even though the father gave the son the wedding of the year they never made peace (even the daughter in law did not speak to him) Rosh Hashana came and the father overheard the son telling his wife "It's ok we just need to hold on for these two days with him, just two days dear and we will be given what we need for our financial year" The father felt horrible, he was devastated.
We think that if we behave these days around the high holidays like we are amazing sons of Hashem so that we can get a good year in return, what are we telling Hashem!? That we see Him as an ATM machine? That we behave a couple of days and fake it and tolerate whatever we have to endure so that we can get a good year? How does Hashem feel!? Thats not at all what these days are about, these days are about rekindling the love Between me and Hashem, recognizing what happened this year how we went through it knowing Hashem was with us, and together with Hashem deciding what i want for my future, how I need things to keep serving him, how we know that Hashem manages the world and only He can help us like a father helps a son/daughter.
When Hashem shows Himself is out of unbelievable love. And everyone can feel it. We wait all year for Rosh Hashana and Kipur to feel that love. When we think back about how wonderous is a year of life with its good times and bad times you see the hand of Hashem and how only with love, pure love He took us through the year. We have to look for that time when we get to experience the most amazing demonstration of love by Hashem granting us the oportunity of presenting ourselves infront of Him and serving Him, and allowing Him to bring us of as His children.
When we appreciate what Hashem does for us everyday since we were created, and we feel so much appreciation for everything He does for us, and we demonstrate the love we feel for Him, and we serve Him and live by Him then we can come in Yom Kipur and stand in front of Hashem and wait for Him to judge us. Because the judgement is not about parnasa or refua or anything else, its about the love we feel for you Hashem and how we want to be by you side all the time.
Right then and there, the closest moment of love is when Hashem decides how much we are worth, because He loves us so much.. But we have to love him back.
Hashem wants to see our account to see if we can "pay" for our life, some pay with money looking at their bank of mitzvot to see if they have enough zejuyot. Others know that theres no price tag in life and they give all their heart and all their love and sacrifice to Hashem, to show how without Him we cant survive.-
escrito por sophie eshkenazi