Tips About Parenting Skills

by Tasha Summers

The 4 Needs of Children

Children need many things. They can range from being physical to emotional. Four things children need are:
1. Physical, where they need food, shelter, and clothing.
2/3. Emotional and Social, where they need love, support, communication, and protection.
4. Intellectual, where they learn through senses, reading, and exploring.
When these needs aren't met kids can suffer from deprivation.
How to nurture these needs are:
1. Pay attention to their activities or interests.
2. Treat each child according to their needs.

The Three Parenting Styles

The Athoritarian

This is where the parent believes that the child should obey their parents without question. If the child misbehaves then the parents usually respond quickly and firmly. Often the child doesn't understand what was done wrong because the parents didn't explain why they are being punished or reprimanded. There are definitely some pros and cons for this one. Here is a small list of pros and cons.
1. A con for this is that most of the time the child doesn't understand what they did wrong.
2. A pro for this is that the child will have learned discipline.

The Assertive-Democratic

This is where the parents allow the children to have more input into the rules and limits. In other words, they are given a certain amount of freedom and independence in choice within the rules. If the child were to misbehave, the parent will allow the child to accept the outcome of their actions. The child is then tasked with helping the parent come up with an appropriate punishment. Here is a small list of pros and cons about this parenting style.
1. A pro is that the child feels that they have made the final decision.
2. Another pro is that the child is learning independence and has some freedom.

The Permissive

This is where the child has free-reign over the parent. The kids are able to do and say what they want. They get to set their own rules and the parents usually ignore any kind of rule breaking. There is no punishment involved. There are definitely some pros and cons to this parenting style. Here are a few pros and cons:
1. The pro to this is the parent feels they are making the child feel good.
2. Another pro to this is that the parents get more free time.
3. A con is the children won't understand what acceptable behavior is; whether it be in public or at home.

How to Give Effective Directions

There are five steps to giving effective directions to a child. They will be listed below in order.
1. Get the child's attention.
2. Say what you want the to do; be sure to use positive statements.
3. Use clear words that the child can understand.
4. Be sure you are only giving one direction at a time so you aren't confusing the child.
5. After the task has been performed, give the child praise and love.
Ex: Your kid keeps throwing their toys around the room. What do you do?
First, stop the child and make sure they are paying attention to what you are going to say. Then tell the child to pick the trucks up. After that has been done, praise them. After that, say something like, "You shouldn't throw toys, you might break something. Go out side and throw a ball instead." Once they are outside throwing the ball, praise them again and make sure they know you love them.

Negative Reinforcement

Negative reinforcement is when the child faces consequences regarding there actions. This serves to strengthen the desired behavior by removing an unpleasant trigger. There are four types of negative reinforcement:
1. Natural consequence. Ex. Child doesn't put correct clothes on for the winter day. They will soon realize that they need warmer clothes.
2. Logical Consequence is when the child makes a mess and has to clean it up.
3. Loss of Privilege is where the child gets something taken away that relates to what they were doing wrong.
4. Time-Out. This is where they will be sent to their room, or to the corner for something they did wrong. The time they are in time-out depends on their age; it's one minute per year. Ex. 5 years old, they will be in time-out for 5 minutes.
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Unintentional Behavior

Unintentional behavior is where the person engages into a group or fall in a certain habit that are acquired from others; it could be good or bad. This can affect children of all ages.
Ex. -
The parent has a bad habit of swearing in front of the child. The child hears this and either thinks it's funny or acceptable and so they start to do it.