The Puffington Post

Your Mom's Guilty Pleasure | Ed. 11 | February 22, 2016

TODAY IN THE NEWS:

Orkhan beats a $2,500 bike ticket in a NYC courtroom against Judge Judy (probably), Darren turns 21 (Happy Birthday!) and FYI: it's #NationalMargaritaDay (you're welcome).

"Everyone wants to target the most successful. Always take it a step further because one small mistake (and one small success) can make the difference." - Yakir

#GOALS

  1. 30 minute delivery - always meet this promise.
  2. Stay S T O C K E D.
  3. Transition your city to 24/7 as soon as possible.


How do we get this done? Remember:

  • Hire when necessary! You have unlimited resources in terms of how many managers and drivers you can have in your city.
  • We are a friendly company! Answer the phone with enthusiasm, be courteous, welcome new employees.
  • Don't miss a detail! Label expiration dates, keep your warehouse as pristine as the Sistine Chapel to ward off inspectors, be prepared for the press to cover your city.



"When I started at goPuff I was promised to work

four hours for four days...that never happened." - Jori

We know, this sh*t can get stressful and it sometimes feels like we're all 22 going on 70. Keep in perspective: we are the smallest on-demand company in the game (as well as the dopest and fastest growing). When it's high pressure, fake it til you make it - it works.

OPERATIONS

TABLET TROUBLES?
Have your drivers take & return a tablet, charger, car port (and goBeer magnet if applicable) all at once so that none of the above gets lost (though it inevitable will, this will delay the process). Props to Matt Broadwater for the suggestion.

DON'T CRY OVER SPILLED MILK...UNLESS IT'S EXPIRED
Every box
in every city should be labeled with the expiration date.
  • For fridge and freezer products: make and stick a note to see everyday.
  • Check 1/2 hour before your shift starts to avoid regrettable munching experiences.
  • Soon to come are many products with shorter shelf lives, starting with salads. Sure, short shelf lives may have been something we said we'd never do, but we also said two years ago that we'd just be selling hookahs. Ha. Ha. Ha.
  • PRO TIP: if you find an unopened box of expired products in your city, send the box back to the vendor in exchange for a new, fre$h one. Props to Orkhan for the suggestion.


AVERAGE DELIVERY TIME

All cities: 33.6

Philly: 35.8

Boston: 35.8

Boston Tier2: 48.6

DC: 25.3

Denver: 31.6

NYC: 33.8

Yesterday (Sunday 2/21): ZERO SUPPORT EMAILS OR TWEETS ABOUT LATE ORDERS 👏👏👏

MARKETING

WHY DO WE HAVE THIRD PARTY ORDERS?

A. To eradicate world hunger.

B. Because updating the GrubHub menu 4 times a day is fun.

C. The first and second parties weren't as fun.

D. To convert customers.
If you answered "C" you're *almost* right. Remember the goal.

ONE MAN'S TRASH IS ANOTHER MAN'S INTRODUCTION TO GOPUFF
Find us heating things up on Boston [insert nice word for garbage can here].

SPOTLIGHT: Orkhan

You know his name, you know his game, you've laughed at his jokes about driver etiquette (even though he wasn't joking). Ladies and gentlemen, New York's finest: Orkhan Manashirov.

From: Russia
Age: 24 going on 25 in June. Must celebrate.
Ballin at goPuff since: October 31, 2015
Position: NYC Regional Manager

  1. What's your favorite part about your job? Customers getting on my nerves.
  2. What's your motto? You already know.
  3. F*ck, marry, spend a year on a cruise with: Netflix, pizza, alcohol? F*ck Netflix, marry pizza, spend a year on a cruise with alcohol.
  4. You're grocery shopping. What's in your cart? Condoms and Plan B (that's a goPuff joke).
  5. What's a turnoff? Girls talking about their ex when you're spitting game ;-)
  6. If you weren't working at goPuff, what would you be doing? NYPD's finest.
  7. What was the best thing since sliced bread? PB&J on that same slice.
  8. Last movie you saw and enjoyed? I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry.
  9. What's your goPuff goal?

    To be on a goPuff yacht with Raf and Yak showering girls with champagne bottles.

  10. If you had a superpower, what would it be? Print money day and night.
  11. What's something you want to accomplish in the next year? To be TALL DARK AND HANDSOME.
  12. You can write one question to be asked in this interview. What is it?

    Why am I taking a test ordered by Taylor @ 11:28 PM on a Sunday night?