Inward Bound Mindfulness Education
Many people are independent and are not used to opening up to others. In Jo’s condition, she is under cover and while in the process, she's finding herself. Because of Jo’s independence and closed up attitude, she’s become used to not allowing others to know how she feels. At IBME, we solve this type problem presenting social activities to the teens; helping them find their happy place. What Jo needed was trust and interaction. She was able to show off her skills clearly during the VBall Game. She was allowed to show her independent qualities while still trusting her team members in order to win the game. It was easy to tell that Jo found her happy place, and that was playing VBall. She explained that she felt good when she was not spending time thinking about her problems. This was a really good sign! In private group we would slowly, but surely get her to open up to the group. This process would give her the ability to speak out more about her life instead of hiding it. People with Jo’s problem can be easily resolved or it can take a while to be resolved. In this case Jo is a tough nut to crack. She has to choose to open up to you. Another issue we’ve noticed is that she is so concerned about how her father would feel about her dropping out of the papping career that she has no time to even consider her thoughts and opinions. IBME leads students through characteristic which allow them to be flexible with their preferences while still being respectful and thoughtful of others. Jo should’ve went to her dad and told him how she felt about papping. She should’ve understood that her father had to respect her decisions too, not just her.
When something tragic happens to those you love, you tend to take upon to yourself to make it your responsibility that the whole mess is your fault. Jake went through the same problem! He was trying to help make life easier for his brother, but he didn’t really know what he was getting himself into. Once he realized his father was just using him for fame and money, he started to feel used and useless. Many teens go through this type of problem every single day. Jake didn’t know how to handle the problem he was facing, mainly because he didn't know what the problem was. All he knew was that he was tired of people walking over him, mainly his father, and he wanted to get more control of his decisions. At IBME, we would normally just take this problem into a group discussion bringing in advice form other group members. We try to incorporate good criticism and always try to build each other up through it. We noticed that Jake loved spending time at the pool or lake, where he can think for himself and relax. We try to provide as many distractions and exercise we can to help teens like Jake build up their self esteem and empathy through workshops and recreational activities.
Dealing with deaths are typically hard to handle. Usually people feel like these deaths were completely their fault, and they allow their emotions to take control over them. Wherever they go, their fears and emotions follow and stab them in the back. They struggle to free themselves from the grasp of their guilt and shame. Here at IBME, we teach teens how to deal with their problems in a more effective way, through activities and exercises which relieve and free stress and pain from their lives. We talk to them about their feelings and help them move on from their past experiences by taking baby steps and moving at their pace. Seth dealt with his problems in a different way, which normally we would try and steer away from the teens. Carrying stubbornness and pain on your back everyday of you life causes you to drag it onto others. That’s exactly what happened in his case... he took his energy and used it against Jo. We don’t want our teens going on that path. In order to help relieve them from their troubles, we allow the students to communicate with each other through discussion groups and participate in activities which will increase their emotional stability and communication skills.
Real Life Situation
For people dealing with self victimization, it is not necessary that you go to a special care facility or retreat but we want to provide you with some helpful tips if you are going through similar problems that Jo, Seth, and Jake are facing. Whenever something tragic happens in your life, never take it upon yourself that its always your fault. Chances are, it probably isn't. Always telling yourself that things wont get better will only bring down your self esteem. Take time to talk to someone about how you feel. You may not always feel comfortable with sharing stories of your life, but it always helps to empathize about your problems. Remember to always respect each other's imperfections and problems. People deal with conflicts in their own way, everyone is different. Making fun or letting out negative energy onto others will only make things worse. Never break yourself, but don't make yourself overly confident either. Always remember that the situation can only get better from the point you're at.
"Teen Retreats | Inward Bound Mindfulness Education." IBme Teen Retreats Comments. N.p., n.d. Web. 15 Apr. 2014.
Rushby, Allison. Shooting Stars. New York: Walker, 2012. Print.