Three Blind Mice: Theft of a Cane
Defendant: I don't know your honor! I'm innocent! I did not steal his cane! He is blind! Why would I want his cane?
Prosecutor: Your honor, the defendant is also blind, he is asking a ridiculous question.
Judge: That is very true. Well, we will find out from the petit jury all of the details and then send the grand jury to discuss the verdict of this arraignment.
Petit Jury foreman: So let me get this straight. The defendant was accused of stealing his own brother's cane. So the brother got a subpoena to bring him to court. Since it is not a felony, there was no indictment. We feel that all of the witnesses brought up by the prosecution have in no violated the law with perjury.
Judge: Alright, let the grand jury discuss.
Grand Jury Foreman: Based on the substantial amount of evidence, we find the defendant guilty. There will be no bail posted as he is convicted for theft. Thank you.
Public Defender: I want an appeal!
Judge: I am sorry, but there is no way you can do that. The evidence is too helpful in proving guilt. It would have been smarter if you plea bargained at the beginning of this trial.