The Beacon

Tips for a Happy Life

Most of what we do, we have no control over unless we pay attention

When we are babies and for the next two years of our lives, our brain absorbs a vast amount of information by what is around us. The brain cannot yet tell what is wrong or right.

During that time we are totally vulnerable to our environment. We need someone to take care of our needs. If we were held and tended to lovingly we develop compassion and trust in the world.

By the time we are seven years old, what we have seen and heard is cemented in our subconscious brain, and this is what we know to be true. This forms our subconsious for the rest of our lives, and we have no say over it. What we do today is only 5% conscious and in our control.

As we go through childhood, we are relatively helpless and are not allowed to make major choices, such as where we live, where we go to school, etc. If our environment is is one where we are demeaned and not supported, we develop coping mechanisms to help us get through pain. For example, we develop self-soothing addictions or we withdraw, ignore the problem, and live in denial. Anything to ease the pain, and live a "normal" life.

Once we are independent, this no longer works. Our coping or defense mechanisms catch up with us. Our relationships fall apart. We have to change, and this only happens if we take the time to become more aware of what is happening. We need to live more consciously, break down our defenses, and make our own choices in life. This is called growing up. It is not enough to intellectualize or “feel” emotions on the surface.

In order to change our negative programming we need to go to that deep place where we were vulnerable and helpless, where the program first started.

Empathic Counselling from the Heart

Empathy recognizes, welcomes and treasures the individuality, personhood, identity, spirit or soul of the other human being in all its shared and unique aspects.

Empathic therapies offer a caring, understanding and empowering attitude toward the individual’s emotional struggles, aspirations and personal growth. They promote the individual’s inherent human rights to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. They respect the autonomy, personal responsibility and freedom of the person. They encourage the individual to grow in self-appreciation as well as in the ability to respect, love and empathize with others.

The Flow of Life

Connect with who you are, naturally.