Book
Lifestyle
Use CROK-1/2/3/4 after each correction
Introduction: (no text yet)
Introduction:
Situation:
Busy, stressful lifestyle harmful to mind and body causes chronic diseases.
Advertising to sell more and more products to you. Make people think that external products will make them happier.
Disconnects people from each other.
People unaware of their egos driving their behaviors and making them fearful and unhappy.
Complications:
Deal with the symptoms with medications, addictions (to cover the pain), destructive behaviors, tuning out with TV, videos, violence.
No education about lifestyle in school or in public media.
Collective egos cause problems.
Schools are brainwashing people into being obedient “workers.” (Rockefeller /Ford Foundation) homeschooling public schools
Have no choices.
To have happiness, must work for money to buy for goods.
American dream to own home traps people into delusion of happiness and makes people to stay in same place, whatever job pays the most, etc.
People want more and more but it can never be enough. Craving that becomes additive.
Never attain and can’t find happiness this way.
Solutions:
Cultivate happiness = inner contentment
What is inner contentment? How can it be achieved? Happiness takes some work!
What goals? What steps?
How to monitor progress?
If you can address the causes of problems, can face and fix them.
Understanding self and ego.
You are not your ego. Notice your ego.
Detoxifying emotional/spiritual body.
Education/reorientation
Start meditating / slowing down/
Free yourself of all outside influences for some period of time.
Be with yourself. Be present. Not thinking about past or future.
Concentrate on breathing in and out.
moderate exercise such as walking;
various stress management techniques including yoga-based stretching, breathing, meditation, and imagery;
and enhanced love and social support, which may include support groups.
Stress reduction
--reducing outside influences
--reducing inner judgments above self and others / practicing non-judgment
(self-acceptance, forgiveness realizing it is just baggage on yourself)
Intentions => behavior => habits => your personal condition
Hierarchy of Needs: (no text yet-bring text from old masterbook text)
Hierarchy of Needs
Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs
Timeline: Past—emotional language—Present---Future
Be a warrior in your life
Identify your strength
Identify your weaknesses
What are your goals
What is important to you
What get you excited
In search of a mentor
Impact of Lifestyle Change: (Copyright text)
For more than 30 years, Dr. Dean Ornish has directed a series of scientific research studies showing, for the first time, that the progression of even severe coronary heart disease can often be reversed by making comprehensive lifestyle changes. These include a very low-fat diet including predominantly fruits, vegetables, whole grains, legumes, and soy products in their natural, unrefined forms; moderate exercise such as walking; various stress management techniques including yoga-based stretching, breathing, meditation, and imagery; and enhanced love and social support, which may include support groups.
These studies also documented that other chronic diseases may be reversible simply by making comprehensive lifestyle changes. These findings are giving millions of people worldwide new hope and new choices, options that are more caring and compassionate that are also more cost effective and competent
Making Changes:
Making Changes
It’s hard. Takes 21 days or more to make successful changes. But everybody is different so the time it takes could vary a lot. Also depends on what is being changed.
Many habits include addictions. So there is a biological process involved. The addicting substance has to leave the body for the change to be feasible..
There’s a big psychological component to many habits that someone might want to change. For example, someone may eat a lot when feeling depressed and they want to change it because it’s making them fat. Eating is making them feeling more satisfied on a certain level, but is not treating the cause, depression.
For this to change, a person would need to find a positive response to feeling depressed. Perhaps going out and taking a walk in nature or doing something else uplifting but without the negative consequences.
The big effort is required at the beginning. When the change of habit goes into effect, then there is a short-cut in the brain.
Takes a lot of self-control not to go back to past patterns. Need to reward yourself if you make a successful change.
If you fail, keep trying until you are successful.
Motivation should be very clear and strong. Need to focus on the result.
Stopped drinking to improve health. If you keep thinking about your health, that will make it easier to change.
Changes to Triggering
People are often triggered into a series of responses and processes that occur over and over again. But the anger or sadness that results is causing them to suffer.
To change a response to being triggered, slowing down the escalation of thoughts is required. This requires becoming very mindful.
A trick is to focus on something that occurs without thought, such as breathing. When you focus on breathing, the mind can’t go to other thoughts.
This breaks the cycle and allows for a more compassionate response. However, as all change, the pattern must be broken many times until the brain is re-wired and the impulse to take the hurtful action not longer is automatic.
Resistance to Change
May be due to some painful or fearful expectations about what will happen if you do make changes.
Beliefs may be standing in the way. May need to change beliefs to overcome resistance. For example, if you want to stop taking medications because of the side effects, you may have to change your belief that medications are a healthy solution.
Some people in your life may not want you t change. So it takes extra effort to overcome their resistance.
Acceptance
The law of cause and effect says that if you keep doing the same thing, you will keep getting the same result. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a different result.
The first step to make a change is a accepting the reality of the situation: cause and effect. If you don’t like the result, you must accept that you must change whatever is giving the result.
Attitude
A positive attitude helps make the change possible. If you can visualize how the change is going to give better results, that will help.
Adjusting
Not going to be easy. But if you get positive feedback from the change, that will make it much easier to implement.
Observe a role model who is doing what you want to do.
Play close attention to your self-talk and self-judgment.
Action
Taking the first step can be the hardest. And sometimes it is the only thing that has to be done to get the process started.
Relapse and Temptation
You may be tempted to go back to the old way because it was so familiar or there was some part of the behavior that was enjoyable or ‘worked” on one level but not overall.
See it as a minor setback. Don’t be too hard on yourself.
Record Your Life Story and Change Your Future
Step 1 : I record how I am, where I grow-up, how was my childhood, what was my interaction with my parents, friends, teachers, what was my feelings at the time, what bad happened to me, why things are the way they are, why I don't have the interaction that I'd like to have with x,y,z....etc.
My recording on my computer was 90mins long from born until today.
Step 2 : Listen to that recording privately, over and over again until you are getting FED-UP with your story. I find out that I was recreating over and over again the same victim mentality and that I was not my story! It's like listening yourself from outside your head, having a different perspective.
I decide to step into the plate of my life. I am the only one that can manage my life, nobody else. You will find strength and courage now to set your goals and rewrite your story.
Physical Exercises : (no text yet)
Flexibility
Physical Exercises :
Exercises especially if you are sitting to a desk most of your days 45min-1h is a minimum, you can run, take a dance class, join a hiking club, play some tennis. Go swimming etc…
Take 30-60mins a day to go outside for a walk, look at the sky, listen to the bird, relax your mind, feel present, listen to yourself breathing. It is very important for your mind to be able to go away from your mental nose and inner dialogue and make space for yourself even if it’s only for a few minutes.
oxygen your brain, cells body, diseases don't like oxygen in an environment that don't have that, big cities
Does a physical active life improve in women with irritable bowel syndrome
Transcendental Meditation TM
The Buddhist society
Relaxation
Zen meditation
Meditation: expend the white light within
Cognitive behavioral therapy
Tai Chi Union
Outside physical activities is preferred
Exercises, gym daily:
exercise plan
stick to it
what physical activity you like
what physical activity is possible for your body
oxygen your brain, cells body, diseases don't like oxygen and profiler in an environment that don't have that
The gym, classes aerobic dace Zumba or according to your condition, age and weight and preference, moderate exercise like walking, swimming, biking
Yoga
Great for stress reduction
Better sleep
Flexibility of the body
All Levels
Mood Enhancer
Kundalini Yoga more for stress release, meditation, remove blocks and energy blocks and brain clutters
Kundolini yoga breath fire technics and ..get video
Flying yoga
Yoga, gurus
Cults
Meditations:
Meditations
Imagine a string of gold light connection the heart of the challenging and difficult people to your heart and looking at the string making beautiful twist between your two heart. At first I really disliked this idea and even find that stupid. My pride was also on the line and my relationship with my manager degrading so I decided that I didn’t have much to loose anyway and started to put this yoga exercise into practice. Well, after a few days we became friends, even went to shop together and make Christmas cooking together. I talk to myself that was maybe a one time result so I tried again with a family member this time. My mom melted the ice a little bite and we were able to pass the defensive line and open a more honest and less defensive dialogue. Like doing that seams to melt the feelings for defense to the other person and trust to adjust their level of defensiveness and dialogue with us. An other very important remark I will say is the fact that most to often we are our own reflexion into the other person. We act and say like the other person is but we really are that person. He really takes courage and acceptance to realize that maybe that person is only showing the reflexion of myself and act, say and do what I accuse the other person way to be.
getting ride of parasites in your life, be firm, take control of the situation, don’t let anyone run the show for you, you are the only one that can make I happens for yourself, nobody else can know you better than yourself, so learn to trust yourself
we can not modify the nature is in balance humans are playing with fire, need to reverse. Starting with you saying no the all this chemical, stop buying, consuming, eating. Back to natural healthy little to not process.
Breathing life and the importance to take the time several time a day to listen to your breath ask your body how he feel and why? Keep a journal a log and read the results 1 week, what can you improve? Change? Are you happy with the results?
Listen to hypnotic music will help you to relax and get a more clear understanding of yourself and what you want to do in your life for some good examples where hypnosis trance can help you is….
Be happy: put some music on that you like, dance, sing, start your day on a positive note. Get your staff for the next day ready so you don’t have to run like a chicken at the last minute. Get organized
–
1. I left my difficult past behind ( adult, teenager, kid)
2. I forgive all peoples that have hurt me in the past ( parents, teachers, friends, lovers...)
3. I forgive myself and sign a contract with myself that from now I putting myself and my needs first
4. I am practicing Law of Attraction Everyday
5. I eat an healthy diet, no chemical, reduce in meat and fish ( almost vegan, raw food)
6. I exercise once a day for an hour (gym, walk, yoga etc...)
7. I meditate everyday for an hour ( music, silence, me with myself and listening to my body)
8. Eliminate all situation and person in your life that can create you stress, anxiety, worries
EGO:
EGO
You are not your ego. Notice your ego.
Look directly at what its trying to do.
Recognizing when it is you or when is it your ego talking
Understanding self and ego.
Listen to your body, it is important that you listen to your body because your body is listening to your mind. The Chinese medicine reveal century ago the connection between the mind and the body as well as your thought…… revoir le livre dis moi out u as mal et jet e dirais…
what is it telling you, (meditation? scanning the body for any pain, sorrow etc)
Living life knowing everything/everyone is/are connected.
Listening to your mind : What is stress?
*your stress level Stress major problem Stress: immune system, hormone unbalanced?
*Speak your truth
*Letting go
-What is your life story? Find how is that stranger that is yourself, ask yourself the right questions, drop the emotional luggage and move forward
*Take charge of your life
*Forgiveness is a gift to yourself
Learn emotional independence
abandonment, insecurity, trust
helplessness
Suffering plays a role to help us solve problems with our lives…it is not to be avoided or dulled, treated as if it were The Problem…like cancer. No, it is a symptom of the problem.
living in the present
Once you stop feeling emotional about certain issues during the day then what your mind does during sleep will fall into line with your new emotional equilibrium in your wakeful life.
Ok to feel emotions and express them in an appropriate manner, well often we are reaction to emotions the way we have been conditioned to do, often by our parents, teacher or friends. Sometimes the reaction is inappropriate and you should learn to recognize, acknowledge and modify your behavior in a more positive way the next time. For example addiction is a big example of inappropriate response to an not controle emotion, the most common are fear of suffering, rejection, envy, jealousy…. How do you react at each of one, is it the proper way to reach? Exercise and rewrite the correct way of reacting.
NLP are the technics that can help you modify your thought and by looking to a problem or a fact in different angles. It is very helpful in most cases
Ok to be yourself
Be ok with your body, take care of your diet, accept the way you are, love yourself and be grateful for your futures even if you don’t like them, it will smooth the resistance that you experience and ease your mind to say, well I think after all I look the part.
write your life story, listen until you get a click fro example, I could step outside my head by listening to my life story recording and I was then able to find a behavior, or something breaking point awakening that make me chance the curse of my life, mentality, archetype, re write lamentation moving to a new past cab\n't be rebuild etc
emotion and deceases the corps et l'esprit connection
Emotional luggage: a simple way to lighted your emotional luggage that you carry with you everywhere is by avoiding yourself to be able to go back in time further than the present
Addictions
What it is?
Is a means of survival--escaping and coping mechanism--taken to an extreme, that is unhealthy and detrimental.
Doing something to take away your attention to facing your problems, which may cause pain and suffering and difficulty because of your approach.
Addiction and to cover over emotions. It is a form of non-recognition that expressing emotions of grief or pain may be necessary to maintain emotional balance.
Data on addiction? According to US government studies, about 24 million Americans are addicted to alcohol and drugs. The number who are being treated is only around 10%.
“Our society and our health care system have been slow to recognize and respond to addiction as a chronic, but treatable, condition,” said Dr. Kima Joy Taylor, director of the CATG Initiative.
Instead, many people are ashamed of their addiction(s) and are unlikely to talk about it (them). Therefore, the number of people with addictions of one form or another is difficult to estimate.
More than that, some people who are not drawn to one type of addiction may be drawn to another. The percentage of people who have at least one form of addiction is nearly impossible to know, but may be very high.
Many different forms
Alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, food, porn, sex, internet, workaholics. People find all kinds of different ways to distract from being in the moment and facing their life situation, which their egos may be saying isn’t good enough.
It creates its own emotional dependence (mood swings) and/or physical dependence (withdrawal symptoms).
Causes
Thoughts lead to beliefs about a person’s life situation. First need to understand that suffering and unhappiness is almost always about the mind’s story about your situation, not your actual situation.
You may feel misunderstood, frustrated and angry. It may come from being unable to fully manage your emotions. It may come from not be able to express yourself in the right way.
Unhappiness easily leads to addictions to cover the pain caused by thoughts and fears. People think they need something to feel better, or stop thinking about it for now, or face yourself, the misery, the fears.
Intro of the downward spiral: Helplessness, Isolation, Stressful life events, Divorce , adults from Divorced parents, Post natal depression, Violence aggression, Withdrawal, Regression, Denial Relate marriage crisis
Abuse: some people have been abuse in a way or an other starting at their younger ages sometimes, it could be a parents, friend, teacher. Those kind of abuse often leaves scares and unspoken trauma that the person may often not remember. In the adulthood it very reemerge from the unconscious in forms of depression, addictions or mental distress and a lot of different diseases most linked to a psychological pattern.
Effects
The nature of addiction is such that more and more is needed, such as pills, alcohol, drugs, internet, TV, causing a downward cycle. Affects not only you but everyone around you, destroys relationships, lives, trust. Can lead to suicide. Unless you are able to become aware and make a choice to refuse to do that anymore. Stop being a victim and take full responsibility. Stop the cause of suffering, not the painful symptoms. Journey of faith to get through it, but the rewards are limitless.
Consequences of addiction: lost of job, family, relationship, kids, homelessness, jail recklessness, car accidents, suicidal behavior, danger for others, violence, out of control behaviors, memory lost, murders
How to conquer
Recognition that my life is not working the way I want.
Slow down, stop, come into the present moment. How bad is it? Or is it ok right here, right now?
Being honest with yourself. I recognize I have a problem. Recognition that I have choices. What are my choices?
I am willing to make effort to get my life back on track. Change beliefs. Change behavior, change environment, at least temporarily.
Acceptance at it is. I can accept what is the past. I accept I can’t change my past, but I cn change my thoughts about the past.
Practise Saying Affirmation
I accept my hurts, humiliation and flaws.
I recognize I hurt people and I will express remorse and forgive myself.
I recognize I need to change my life.
I accept myself as I am.
I embrace and love the person I am.
I cherish the scared and hurt child in myself.
I step up to the plate and show that I am a responsible adult and I stand up for myself.
I accept the theory of in and out: it’s my fault, not the other person, not the environment only the mirror of my internal state of mind.
I learn new social skills and how to cope with stress and anxiety.
I can’t do all it all.
I can t be perfect
I can accept help.
I understand the importance of self care.
I will start the next moment of my journey.
I will change what I have control over for my own good.
I will reduce my stress.
Meditation is also a great tool to achieve peace and calm and mediation helps a lot in case of depression anxiety, pains all kind etc…
It’s going inside yourself and spending sometimes with yourself than most of people are afraid to do because it is very well unknown to our western society but becoming more and more popular.
A word of warning when looking for a good mediation classes avoid a certain number of entities how can drag you into a cult or a sect. be caution about that. If possible take a class with a friend that would be wiling to try. A boss, a kid, a family member, a friend, husband, bf to whom you can’t say no and more often those persons will take advantage of the situation against your will
I do recommend Kundalini Yoga, it helps me a lot when I was dealing with my career and I was totally exhausted. It is in this kind of situation that most of the time you don’t recognize that you are in the biggest distress and that you need time to centered yourself back.. You will then feel frustrated, hungry but most of the time you will keep it for yourself, baring your emotions and that’s where you can become sick. Be aware of those everyday situations that will add it up until you explode or get you in a very negative mindset.
Join a support group
and enhanced love and social support, which may include support groups
Observe, listen, meet
Play a major role into that support group to help the newcomers with the issues
Say no- set boundaries
Alcohol recovering
Autogenic Society
HYPERLINK "http://www.autogenic-therapy.org.uk/" http://www.autogenic-therapy.org.uk/
Music therapy:
Singing: remove block in your voices, help for expressing yourself better with words and build a strong voice presence, study on the voice strength and speech, speed to influence, gain respect and get your audience captivated Free your voice into activite will also free your voice in life.
Composing/paying instrument: connected to emotion, way to express yourself, sad, joy, etc
Dance: let the body express its deepest feelings, gain flexibility, clear of mind
Paint: express in images your mind, work also for psychosis and schizophrenic peoples
Acting, the craft, expression of emotions, releases, role playing, spontaneite
Drugs Medication
Drugs Recreational
Eating Disorder The eating disorder association
Overweight
underweight
Death
Obsessive compulsive ------------------------------------
, MIND support and advices
For obesity alcohol drug use ----life coaching program, commit to the contract
HYPERLINK "http://www.autogenic-therapy.org.uk/autogenic-training/" http://www.autogenic-therapy.org.uk/autogenic-training/
Negative Emotional Detox:
Negative Emotional Detox
Stress, failure, disappointments, feed your script, I am worthless, just like my parents, teacher, friends…told me.
Recalled painful memory and coping mechanisms
Te history curse family the script, passes to generations, believes makes it powerful, have you questioned your family script is it passed on solid foundation. What have you been told over and over again during your childhood, youth about your family, is it true?
Self fulfilled prophesies
Your connecting roots
Dealing with regrets
And what if it’s too late—motivation accelerator
Perfectionism will paralyze and always hold you back, robe your life from what you can archive
Identify, critic, modify, lie, anger
Write letter, burn it, iced it freezer,
Procrastination, based on fear, the unknown, where fear is identified, brainstormed and acted upon, it will dissolve procrastination. Education is the key to remove mental blocks. There is nothing that anyone has already experiment before so don’t be afraid to dig it.
Conflict management
Courteous but firm, detachment, no showing any emotion, resist to pushing buttons either way.
Confronting peoples but staying diplomatic, non confrontational, non judgmental, always speaks from your heart.
Refuse requests
What disappointed you in life
Why emotion drive your crazy
Grief, lose, coping mechanisms
-What is your life story? Find how is that stranger that is yourself, ask yourself the right questions, drop the emotional luggage and move forward
Abandonment, insecurity, trust issues
helplessness
Suffering plays a role to help us solve problems with our lives…it is not to be avoided or dulled, treated as if it were The Problem…like cancer. No, it is a symptom of the problem
Emotional luggage: a simple way to lighted your emotional luggage that you carry with you everywhere is by avoiding yourself to be able to go back in time further than the present
Ok to feel emotions and express them in an appropriate manner, well often we are reaction to emotions the way we have been conditioned to do, often by our parents, teacher or friends. Sometimes the reaction is inappropriate and you should learn to recognize, acknowledge and modify your behavior in a more positive way the next time. For example addiction is a big example of inappropriate response to an not controle emotion, the most common are fear of suffering, rejection, envy, jealousy…. How do you react at each of one, is it the proper way to reach? Exercise and rewrite the correct way of reacting.
Battling with your dark and light angel shoulder
Self Control
EFT
Eye technics, right, left etc…
See the world in a different light
How death are you inside, how asleep are you, how disconnected are you???????
--Frustration
Is impatience. Full of judgments. Non-acceptance of what is. Suffering is caused by a difference between what you want and what is. May be caused by injustice by a larger power or authority that can’t be changed. Feel small.
Acceptance what is today. End the suffering of non-acceptance.
Patience. Set good intentions. Things can be different in the future. Imagining the future (visualizing) where frustration is behind you. Work toward a goal. Self-empowerment.
One method is compassion for person causing the frustration. Removes some of unacceptable tension.
--Craving
When a desire becomes unchecked. Puts you in a position where you can never get enough. Want more and more, never satisfied.
Craving for attention, love, money, power, recognition.
-- Obsession
Gambling, workaholic, love/sex obsession, money (greed/miserly), to the exclusion of everything else; Opposite of balance. Destructive behavior caused by ego to be bigger/better than anyone else.
Coping is regain perspective of reality. Recognize unhealthy outcomes. Related to wanting/having; identifying, attaching to build ego rather than love, acceptance of one’s own value as a person. Have inner value. Find peace with yourself. Related to addictions; not present, just an unconscious habit. Become self-aware your obsessing to correct behavior. Don’t judge yourself or the habit. Just stop/eliminate/dissolve the source of suffering.
--Regrets
Full of judgments above yourself or a situation. Won’t accept what happened. Holding onto the past. Non-forgiveness of self of choices made. Non-acceptance of reality.
Baggage of past thoughts and emotions. Drop the bag in the river from the bridge to be happy again when you realize it’s not helping and limiting your new choices. Cannot live in the past or the future, only right now.
--Resentment
Negative emotion of something real or imagined done in past.
HYPERLINK "http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_C._Solomon" \o "Robert C. Solomon" Robert C. Solomon, a professor of philosophy at the University of Texas at Austin, places resentment on the same line-continuum with HYPERLINK "http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Contempt" \o "Contempt" contempt and HYPERLINK "http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anger" \o "Anger" anger. According to him, the differences between the three emotions are as follows: resentment is directed towards higher- HYPERLINK "http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Status" \o "Status" status individuals, anger is directed towards equal-status individuals and contempt is directed towards lower-status individuals.
Psychologist James J. Messina recommends five steps to facing and resolving resentful feelings. (1) Identify the source of the resentful feelings and what it is the person did to evoke these feelings, (2) develop a new way of looking at past, present and future life, including how resentment has affected life and how letting go of resentment can improve the future, (3) write a letter to the source of the resentment, listing offenses and explaining the circumstances, then forgive and let go of the offenses (but do not send the letter), (4) visualize a future without the negative impact of resentment, and (5) if resentful feelings still linger, return to Step 1 and begin again
Childhood
teenager
adulthood
mid age
experience
wisdom
open the channel of communication of your brain
resentment
letter at your parent, sister, brother, teacher people that have hurt you
let words flow on paper get everything that you have on your heart out
cry if you feel like allow time to get into that place and know that it is not longer anymore necessary to carry that negatives experiences with you.
where to start just write something for 2mn’anything
it will flow
burn, freeze, red it over and over using tapping technique to minimize the stress
anger
dealing with anger and coping skills, anger management
--Anger
Response to having been wronged, offended. Modern psychologists view anger as a primary, natural, and mature emotion experienced by virtually all humans at times, and as something that has functional value for survival.
Lead to violence, abuse. Modern psychologists point out that suppression of anger may have harmful effects. The suppressed anger may find another outlet, such as a physical symptom, or become more extreme.
Anger can have many physical and mental consequences. Releasing anger rather letting it build up. Can be achieved through sport, screaming in safe place. Breathing. Exercises.
Let it go right away. Don’t store anger. Can be expressed to in ‘right’ way. Say why something makes you feel this way and why. Be honest and mature. Be open if person did not intend to anger you. Don’t cover anger with addiction. Be aware something “old” may trigger you.
Quick and Simple Anger management technics:
Envy: You don't have, want. Unhealthy wanting that you have what someone else has. The Ego wanting and causes suffering because you don't have it, it causes distress in the body and in the mind and crazy making, their have, their position
Jealousy: You have it, past. Jealousy is attachment to something or someone, fear of lose, family rivalry between sublimes or family members, neighbor, schoolmates, friends, can touch everyone.Jealousy is different than envy, possessiveness,both negatives effects and wanting always more and more. Indulging the ego.
Solution: Appreciating what you have, present, once again in the present moment.
Hatred: Severe ego problem, putting down to an extreme, affect intension to their action. Natural haters, justified or not, learn to hate people. Conditioning, race, discrimination racial, against women, certain groups of men, religions, countries, handicapped persons. Putting down to elevate himself. Treating ego, bitter, anger, lack self confidence, unhappiness keep building, no goals, no ambitions, no plans, emptiness.
Judgement: Judgmental mind, everyone judge it's natural, way to the ego to compare, a scale that create are connected to your believes, right or wrong, way to process the information from the senses and the thoughts, emotions, behavior, we want the person to behave the way we want, attempt to control, showing to other peoples. Make right or wrong, I judge, other peoples judge.
Solution: Practice non-judgement takes efforts. Accept what is. Accepting others the way they are, freedom to choose point of view, being open to others perceptions, believes, respect, openminded.
Non Acceptance: A certain cause of suffering, non choose to not accepting, addiction, accepting the reality could be painful, must deal with the pain, rejection of the reality will lead to more pain later. Accepting reality, accepting how it is. How to make it more bearable to accept? Frustration, need patience, making changes, intentions to change. Use imagery, constructive change of behaviors, proactive. challenging energy create from non-acceptance, can't accept, emotion, reaction, angry, disgusted, rebellious, awareness,, what can be done, enthusiastic. Learn to turn anger into positive, constructive energy. Justice, warning system, sociopath.
Non-acceptance and accepting yourself has you are, too short, too fat, to black, physical appearances. Mirroring to others. By accepting yourself, other people will accept you. Mirror concept. Necessary for self love, start inside to out. Dating, relationships, if you don't love yourself, you can not love anyone else, partner, children, family, social, co-workers, friends...If one person become more conscious in a relationship, friendship, the equilibrium is broken and the relationship will dissolve. Relationship=balance=unbalance will fade away.
Non Forgivness: Baggage of old thoughts and emotions. Holding a grievance and non acceptance. Try to let go and forgive does not work. It happens to yourself when you realize that there is nothing there for you anymore, when you see that holding the grievance if only hurting you. You inflict the pain to yourself. The events or other person sometimes don't even know you feel that way. events happening 20 years ago, stay in the present. past is past can't change it. It doesn't mean it's ok, it's a favor you give to yourself.
Acceptance
Forgiveness
Letting Go Of The Past
Unharmonious Relationship
Non-Judgments
Violence:
Violence:
Violence against women, children, groups, races and more rarely but still against some men
Injuries, frightening, trauma, sexual violence, physical violence, emotional violence. Family member or close relatives, rules of silence, shame, embarrassment, fear. Responses learn in family will be likely to be perpetuated on the next generation.
If it’s happens, leave immediately from immediate danger
Get help, many associations are free and your identity will stay anonymous, they will help you to find a solution so you can remove yourself from dangerous situation. By not taking action the person will not likely to change and fail to recognize there is a problem or the typical apologizes, make up and crisis cycle until next crisis more violent that the precious one. Failing to take action will lead to escalading violence, danger for your life and even murdered by that person.
Responding to domestic violence: be calm; do not react with hostility; leave asap (whether you are a woman or man – if you are a man, you may easily be arrested even if woman is hitting you).
Brainwashing:
A large part of lifestyle choices are made as a result of brainwashing. Beliefs determine actions, as well as the context of interpreting life events and circumstances. And unhappiness and suffering often result not from current life circumstances but from a persons interpretation of them.
But unless a person questions his or her beliefs, they are probably “brainwashed beliefs,” resulting from many sources that occur over a lifetime.
From early childhood, through school, and graduate studies (e.g., medical school), we are told what to believe and trained not to think for ourselves.
Advertisers develop sophisticated ways to shape beliefs that are beyond the awareness of most people.
Very effective belief brainwashing makes people believe that babies need to eat baby food sold at stores, or that dogs and cats should eat special foods that come in bags and cans.
Brainwashing of Schools
By creating chaos, schools teach kids to accept being confused as a way of life. It is much easier to get people to accept beliefs that are not in their best interest if they are used to being confused. If the desired ‘brainwashed belief’ is confusing, it can still be accepted by a person used to being confused.
Schools brainwash kids into thinking what they are “good” and “bad” at doing through constant tests. Brainwashed people carry those beliefs their whole lives.
Schools teach that a person’s work is unimportant and can be interrupted at any time though the use of bells.
Schools teach emotional dependence on external sources of authority. It doesn’t matter whether we enjoy the activity, just whether we got a star or F on the assignment.
Schools teach intellectual dependency. We write papers on what an authority said about a book, instead of what we think about it.
Schools teach us to give up any privacy and submit to being watched and evaluated by others all of the time. Others evaluations are more important than our own. This leads to the belief that our happiness comes externally, not internally.
Advertising and Media
How many hours of TV do you watch/day?
Do you watch the commercials telling you that you will be looking, smelling, etc better with their products. Do you believe them?
There is of course a fine line between wanting a product and buying all the products of the brand to look cool or to shine in front of your friends or
Be aware of products placement in movies, do you rent movies or stream on your computer/TV?
Be aware of products placement out there. A champion is the number 1 national brand of Soda that is everywhere near an actor or in the shoot at a coffee place etc…
Hollywood studios making millions of dollars contracts with big names brands so their products will appear in their movies. It is a huge business and your brand will pick it up like this is a normal part of every day life product.
The same apply for fast food brands, luxury cars, clothing lines, computers brands etc…next time you are watching a Hollywood movie at your local theater notice that subliminal advertisement products.
Medical System
The training of doctors is to use pills and surgery to fix every health problem. There is no training on food as medicine, for example.
And so the medical profession is going to prescribe pills and surgery and we believe they are the only solutions because they are the only ones being presented.
How to recognize a “brainwashed belief”?
Ask yourself if it is in your best interest? Or how will this serve me?
One belief corporations want us believe is to work harder or longer to get ahead, and that getting ahead of co-workers will lead to greater prosperity and fulfillment.
If I involves money…
And what are the solutions?
Detoxify belief system. Get rid of beliefs that serve the interests of other beyond your own.
This requires the very independent thinking that the school system tried to destroy so it may not feel ‘natural’ at first for many.
Question what choices others want you to make and what you would have to believe to make a certain choice. For example, if a doctor is recommending a surgery or other treatment, we can question whether we believe this is the answer to the cause of the problem or just a treatment of a symptom.
Purpose: control,
Buying products, giving $ to religions, government
Making people do something now future reward
Making people obey (military).
(Big governments only exist for war)
Creating a false sense of reality
and corporat interest
Accepting the inacceptable (vaccines)
Targetng kids to target parents
Accepting society as it is without questioning authority or system
school system, education formatted
school education formation, the logical brain versus the right/left brain,
dysfunctional family and relationship regaining balance
TV brain-watching But please do not watch TV, brain washing, get yourself reduce to a zombie
Young children with ipad and phone apps
People get brainwashed at school (see Gatto book/speech)
Medical students
Copyright bellow text:
Dumbing Us Down: the Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling
By John Taylor Gatto
Was it possible I had been hired not to enlarge children’s power, but to diminish it? That seemed crazy on the face of it, but slowly I began to realize that the bells and confinement, the crazy sequences, the age-segregation, the lack of privacy, the constant surveillance, and all the rest of the national curriculum of schooling were designed exactly as if someone had set out to prevent children from learning how to think, and act, to coax them into addiction and dependent behavior.
In his speech, “The Seven-Lesson Schoolteacher,” Gatto describes the seven lessons that are taught in all public schools by all teachers in America, whether they know it or not. He writes:
The first lesson I teach is confusion. Everything I teach is out of context. I teach the un-relating of everything. I teach dis-connections….Even in the best of schools a close examination of curriculum and its sequences turns up a lack of coherence, full of internal contradictions….Confusion is thrust upon kids by too many strange adults, each working along with only the thinnest relationship with each other, pretending, for the most part, to an expertise they do not possess….In a world where home is only a ghost, because both parents work…or because something else has left everybody too confused to maintain a family relation, I teach you how to accept confusion as your destiny.
The second lesson I teach is class position….The children are numbered so that if any get away they can be returned to the right class….My job is to make them like being locked together with children who bear numbers like their own.…If I do my job well, the kids can’t even imagine themselves somewhere else, because I’ve shown them how to envy and fear the better classes and how to have contempt for the dumb classes….That’s the real lesson of any rigged competition like school. You come to know your place.
The third lesson I teach is indifference….When the bell rings I insist they drop whatever it is we have been doing and proceed quickly to the next work station. They must turn on and off like a light switch….Bells inoculate each undertaking with indifference.
The fourth lesson I teach is emotional dependency. By stars and red checks, smiles and frowns, prizes, honors, and disgraces, I teach kids to surrender their will to the predestinated chain of command.
The fifth lesson I teach is intellectual dependency….It is the most important lesson, that we must wait for other people better trained than ourselves, to make the meanings of our lives….[Only], the teacher can determine what my kids must study, or rather, only the people who pay me can make those decisions, which I then enforce. If I’m told that evolution is a fact instead of a theory, I transmit that as ordered, punishing deviants who resist what I have been told to tell them to think….Successful children do the thinking I assign them with a minimum of resistance and a decent show of enthusiasm….Bad kids fight this, of course, even though they lack the concepts to know what they are fighting, struggling to make decisions for themselves about what they will learn and when they will learn it…Fortunately there are tested procedures to break the will of those who resist; it is more difficult, naturally, if the kids have respectable parents who come to their aid, but that happens less and less in spite of the bad reputation of schools. No middle-class parents I have ever met actually believe that their kid’s school is one of the bad ones. No one single parent in twenty-six years of teaching.
The sixth lesson I teach is provisional self-esteem….The lesson of report cards, and tests is that children should not trust themselves or their parents but should instead rely on the evaluation of certified officials. People need to be told what they are worth.
The seventh lesson I teach is that one can’t hide. I teach students they are always watched, that each is under constant surveillance by myself and my colleagues….The meaning of constant surveillance and denial of privacy is that no one can be trusted, that privacy is not legitimate.
Emotional Support:
The importance of emotional support during a life crisis or life threatening disease:
The evolving lifestyle beliefs and choices that we are making are leading to progressively isolated lives when it comes to intimate relationships with people who truly care.
Being connected to hundreds of ‘friends’ on social media can take time away from valuable, deeper personal friendships. It’s easy for these distractions to cover over a life with few meaningful relationships, such as with family members.
On the positive side, with more ways to connect to people through social media can also lead to access to people and support groups that simply wasn’t possible before they came along.
Technology isn’t good or bad. Its how its used.
Research shows that our emotional response to problems and circumstances has a lot to do with how much we will both suffer as well as how successful the recovery can be. With the emotional support of friends, we can process our emotions in a healthy way rather than try to contain them or have them spin us out of control.
For many people, and depending on the type of problem, being in an anonymous support group where people just know each other in the group can be very effective. It can be helpful to know others are having or have experienced the same problems, and may be able to offer help on how they have been getting better results meeting the problem.
There is also a potentially large benefit from a group simply listening and facilitating the expression of emotions. Just feeling ‘not alone,’ heard and understood can make all the difference.
It can also be very useful to respond to others with compassion and care. Realizing others are dealing with much larger problems can make a problem seem smaller.
Fears:
FEARS
Are a natural emotion that can play both positive and negative roles in life. On a positive side, it can help protect us from danger. A person without much fear can do things that very few can, such as function as a test pilot or astronaut. It was said that Neil Armstrong could perform life-threatening experiments without a rise in his pulse.
On a negative side, fears can cause great stress and suffering, often needlessly, and result in debilitating conditions. Fears can magnify in the mind far beyond any rational analysis of and event, its probability or its impact, often in the middle of the night, for many people. Fears can make people avoid doing normal things that could enhance their happiness and fulfillment in life, if only they didn’t have the fear.
A lot fears are generated by the ego. There is no real life-threatening situation. It’s just a threatening situation for the life of the ego.
Public speaking, for example, is a common fear. It’s just a fear of being judged. The ego doesn’t want to be seen as a bad performer,
Solutions
Walk in the direction of your fears. We often likely find that the fears of something are much greater than the impact of the thing being feared.
If we walk in the direction of the feared event or outcome, we discover the very thing that is holding us back in life to achieving our goals.
It is good to talk about fears. It helps. Perspective is gained.
Also we can sometimes find the root cause of the fear. When we do, we can look at it every time the fear resurfaces. Each time we do, the fear becomes smaller.
Have no fears: if there is a solution, no need to be anxious about; if no “solution,” no reason to be anxious.
“We have nothing to fear but fear itself.” – Franklin Roosevelt
Overcoming Fears:
FEARS
What are your fears:
Identify your fears, addictions, struggles etc
Your 10 worst fears
Fears inner child meditation
(voir cahier noir) provide a lits
death etc
Dissolving fears technics
Do not fear your gut is always right.
The fear factor?
You Positif:
60 000 thought a day, manage and guide the majors ones
Ear smell view touch
You can control your thoughts
be our own cheerful parents nurturing
your substitute parents spiritual, choose someone and model
the imaginary protection shied meditation
Patience
Positive image building exercises (black book)
Meditation technics reat with love someone you don’t like, have difficulty, boss, coworker, family member
deactivates that bring you joy
identify your passions in life
My Witnesses, be honest with yourself
your qualities
how do you feel about it
write it down
Feeling a shift yet?
Explain what do you feel?
Every week plan 1 thing fun for you to do or something different like a short week end trip, going out to eat in restaurant, hairdressers, shopping time or anything you feel like pleasurable to do
In addition to that, each time you archive something reward yourself, some food that you like, a movie, a night out with your friends.
It is very important to have a mentor in each category of your life that you’d like to improve, for example
Don’t be afraid to ask when you need something, if you don’t the other person won’t know what is in your head and you can miss big on opportunities that way. Always find a way to challenge yourself, it will make you feel alive and make you feel like you are looking for the next step in your life. You are the only one in charge and only YOU can make it happen for yourself. Don’t really on anyone to live your own life.
Define your limits what is enough, what is not enough, what I want, write it down, record it, listen to eat, speak it lowed often
Be caring with yourself
Write down 5 of your best qualities- A few qualities examples but feel free to ad it up your own.
Be grateful, always, stay humble, do action with your heart, think of others, how can you help them, when was the last time you did something for someone without expecting anything in exchange
Asking for help
Ask and it will be giving
Peoples loves to help, much more that you think actually
Stay positive
Say yes to opportunity
Forgiveness:
Moving on
Crying to release it’s healing, don’t be afraid of that
It will release blocks
Exploring yourself, the physical, mental, spiritual body aura charrkras etc
What is your true
Trait of character get into
Always read and document yourself about the goal or area of your life you want to improve, be specific today are so many information out there, there is no more excuses. Time , make time, schedule eg this week I will take 30min to 60 min (set your own time) to work on my goal, problem?
Research books
Researches info on the internet, I call just ask google, your best friend lol
*Take charge of your life
*Forgiveness is a gift to yourself
*Speak your truth
*Letting go
Learn emotional independence
Living life knowing everything/everyone is/are connected.
And the success you have encounter. You are training your mind and let you know that if he find a solution for yourself he will be awarded. Pleasure versus pain]
Take care of your body, don’t be to arch on him, don’t push him to hard, be gentle, get
Listen to your intuition
Limitation of the woman barrier, education, limitations
Present moment, be a cat skin
anything had to be thinking first
toughest always become self fullfithing prophecies
mental images
change the mental images by the opposite,
Learning to feed yourself with positive emotional thoughts
Sliderocket relationship
When we think about relationships, we usually think about them with others, such as a romantic one, a family one, or ones with friends.
Not often, do we think about the relationship with oneself.
Yet, this may be the most important one of all.
How can we love another, or be able to accept the love of another, if we don't love ourselves?
How can we accept others if we can't accept ourselves?
How can we forgive others if we can't forgive ourselves?
Getting Organized:
Getting Organized
Get Organized
Start by de-cluttering: though away what don’t need anymore.
Physical taking space but also affects on emotional level. Feeling of being done with something. Putting past behind. Feel more freedom. Lighter.
Involves the emotions. Is an emotional process. Letting go. Moving on. Could remind you of projects that failed, or past relationships, etc.
Emotional baggage.
Organizing external space can help organize internal thoughts, feelings, etc.
Writing thoughts in a journal very important. Writing reinforces it then the ability to go back and see it makes it much more likely that you will remember and use it when needed.
Thoughts can be somewhat random. Don’t usually come in an organized flow. Usually have to organize the ideas in order to present them in an organized way. But people vary.
Gain mental clarity.
Makes more focused and time-efficient.
Next steps become cleaer.
Less frustration if had spent time looking for things cant find.
Built files, like things together.
Files into boxes.
How to have time for your life
Manage Your Time
Time management
Record a daily log for a week, what are you spending your time, beginner, end. Analyze what are not necessary time consuming, where can you free your schedule
Mond.tuesd, wed…..
How much free time do you have know to work on yourself?
You are not selfish
You need time for yourself
Essential to your mental balance and wellbeing
Make space in your apartment., in your life
reorganize your life from the ground up
Explain quick finshu principle, clutter and mind is connected
Be in controle
Build A Perfect Routine
Discipline, discipline and discipline.
Why it is so important
Finances/Investing: from R (need editing)
Finances/Investing
EMBED Package
EMBED Package
Wealth Management: Investing for Happiness
I’ve read happiness research articles and surveys and “top 10 lists” and investing is never on them.
Is your investing experience a happy one?
Most people are poor predictors of what will make them happy. When it comes to investing and happiness, research shows that the ultimate amount of wealth created does not count so much as the process one uses to get there.
For many, their investment experience over the years involves taking larger risks than they expected. At times, the gains can be large and result in feelings of greed. At other times, the losses can be large and result in feelings of fear. In both cases, this is a process certain to create a lot of stress.
A reason people may get caught up in this clearly unhappy process is the bandwagon effect, the tendency to do (or believe) things because many other people do (or believe) the same. For many, the risk of not investing like the majority is purely psychological;
Many cognitive biases have been demonstrated by research in psychology and behavioral economics. These are systematic deviations from a standard of rationality or good judgment.
One such bias is the “bandwagon effect,” the As long as investors are obtaining the
When they assess with the expectation that the investment will enable the investor to meet long-term retirement goals.
this translates to what is called underperformance v. a benchmark (e.g., the S&P 500), or “tracking error.” This can be purely an “opportunity loss,” as opposed to an actual loss of money, if the investment returns were positive but not as good as the market’s return for the year.
Behavioral economists have discovered numerous systematic biases that can cause people to be poor investors or make mistakes investing. Some of these include ….
These behavioral biases, while important to understand, still doesn’t address the biggest biases of all: the tendency with typical investment strategies to take market returns.
ultimate goal of individuals for long-term investing: happiness.
Investment advisers typically begin the investment process by asking clients what their investment objectives are and what their tolerance for risk is.
Many think it’s a gift that good fortune bestows on us and a reversal of fortune takes back. Others see it as an ephemeral state of bliss.
While happiness may be subjective and personal, it can also be seen as a skill to be practiced. Achieving genuine happiness as a way of being is a skill that needs development and practice. It requires bringing awareness and consciousness to all facets of life. To do that, we must change ourselves.
Investors can use the findings of happiness-research to improve their investment process to produce more satisfying results.
The Declaration of Independence states vests with rights to “Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness.”
Well being
Satisfaction
Relative
Subjective
Personal
There’s an old saying in business that the customer’s always right. Therefore, investment advisers typically start by asking their clients what their investment objectives and risk tolerances are.
However, research shows that most people are poor predictors of what will make them happy. Some wealth clients work and save for decades, deferring activities that would bring them genuine happiness, building large estates. They expect that will ensure happiness in the latter stage of their lives, only to find that they are unhappy and that their estate has little to
Therefore, advisers may benefit from a better understanding of happiness and unhappiness when assisting clients in selecting an investment plan and strategy.
Money can’t buy me love…or happiness.
Promote :
Practice Goal-Based investing. Achieving life’s goals leads to satisfaction and contentment. Goals should be modest and attainable, given the size of the investment rather than grandiose.
Appreciate what you have. Happiness is a way of interpreting the world rather than one’s exact condition.
Divesting from ego-strengthening assets.
Avoid:
Taking large risks. Leads to greed and craving for more and more. Can create unhealthy addiction such as gambling. Can also lead to high stress and fear of loss if much is at risk. High stress levels are highly related to heart disease, cancer, sleep disorders, addictions.
Frequently checking the market or your account. Negative effect for an average loss is 2.5 the magnitude of a positive one.
Market-Based Investing. Trying to beat a benchmark. Future market returns cannot be predicted with much reliability. To belief that they can be is to deny the reality of the randomness
Regreting investment decisions. Understand the reality that no one can know the future. A large source of unhappiness comes from not
Opportunity Losses. There are thousands every day…
Blaming markets, politicians, .
regulate experience and action once an emotion is felt
HYPERLINK "http://www.economist.com/node/21556989" http://www.economist.com/node/21556989
Richard Easterlin of the University of Southern California, an eminent “happiness scholar
HYPERLINK "http://www.libertarianism.org/publications/essays/pursuit-happiness-research-is-it-reliable-what-does-it-imply-policy\\" http://www.libertarianism.org/publications/essays/pursuit-happiness-research-is-it-reliable-what-does-it-imply-policy\
In Pursuit of Happiness Research: Is It Reliable? What Does It Imply for Policy?
The Journal of Happiness Studies
HYPERLINK "http://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10902-012-9328-4" http://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10902-012-9328-4
Investors can use the findings of happiness-research to improve their investment process to produce more satisfying results.
negative effects on happiness, like inadequate education, chronic pain, sleep disorders, depressions, divorce, single-parent families, and financial hardship.
high levels of negative feelings: stress, depressions, sadness, anger and worry.
Investment outcomes without happiness
HYPERLINK "http://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10902-012-9328-4/fulltext.html#Sec2" http://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10902-012-9328-4/fulltext.html#Sec2
The ego often convinces us that we cannot be happy now. The ego tells us that if we have more money, or become someone or something else, then we will be happy. The last thing our egos want us to know is that now is the only time we can be happy.
The notion that obtaining more and more material goods and services or recognition will make us happy is bound to lead to unhappiness. The Dalai Lama has pointed out that if our wants and desires remain unchecked, sooner or later we will run up against something that we can’t have. That approach fails to recognize that genuine happiness is, after all, an inner state, how we view our situation, not our circumstances (to a very large degree). “Primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it.”
The second, more reliable approach is not to get what we want but rather want and appreciate what we have. When we take that approach, it is easy to see that our financial assets are only a part of our true wealth.
Wealth management, as it has been traditionally practiced, has been focused solely on our financial well-being. It ignores the other areas of life that contribute to our total personal wealth and happiness: our health, personal relationships, and spiritual (not religious) well-being.
We have our doctors, psychologists and therapists to help with the other areas, so what is the point of making the wealth manager a life manager? Doctors and therapists tend to ignore our financial well-being and financial advisors ignore the other parts of our wealth, so it seems important that there is an advisor for help in investing
important to creating an inner sense of peace and contentment with life in the present moment.
For those with $20 million or more in “investable”
How to invest life’s energy (energy management)
Happiness
An inner state
Eliminating the sources of suffering
Suffering is a misapprehension of the nature of reality
Remove toxins
Finances/
low risk / low stress
avoiding the big loss(es)
avoiding the trap of wanting the most
comparisons and benchmarks
reporting periods
gift giving /
Health
For more than 30 years, Dr. Dean Ornish has directed a series of scientific research studies showing, for the first time, that the progression of even severe coronary heart disease can often be reversed by making comprehensive lifestyle changes. These include a very low-fat diet including predominantly fruits, vegetables, whole grains, legumes, and soy products in their natural, unrefined forms; moderate exercise such as walking; various stress management techniques including yoga-based stretching, breathing, meditation, and imagery; and enhanced love and social support, which may include support groups.
These studies also documented that other chronic diseases may be reversible simply by making comprehensive lifestyle changes. These findings are giving millions of people worldwide new hope and new choices, options that are more caring and compassionate that are also more cost effective and competent.
What to avoid/what to promote
--physical
/ food
It's the blend of Mediterranean diet components - not one particular ingredient - that promotes heart health, according to Martinez-Gonzalez.
"The quality of fat in the Mediterranean diet is very good," he told Reuters Health. "This good source of calories is replacing other bad sources of calories. In addition, there is a wide variety of plant foods in the Mediterranean diet," including legumes and fruits as desserts, Martinez-Gonzalez added.
"I think it's a combination of what's eaten and what's not eaten," agreed Mozaffarian, who wasn't involved in the new research.
"All of these steps are making, at the end of the day, a big difference," Martinez-Gonzalez said.
--mental
Spiritual
--cultivating emotional balance
Buddhist
Awareness
Being Present
Compassion
Acceptance of what is
Foregiveness
Relationships
Be of service
Acceptance
Non-judgement/criticism
Life’s work
Consciousness
Eckhart tolle
Bankruptcy is becoming more and more popular those days. Crisis is like a black huge monster in the corner and debt is almost always unavoidable. Bankruptcy…erase your debt, start fresh, need to fill paper file with a lawyer. definition…it is ok to feel for bankruptcy you will start a new an fresher life after that. Don’t forget to educate yourself about budgeting and how to make to most use of your money. There are several books that can help you with that and when you will be implementing their advices you will quickly see some results. A few examples is to live bellow your needs. For example, do you really need to go for window shopping every week? Do you really need this new dress? Make sure you refrain your pulsing, your wallet will tell you thank you later one. The same apply for your accommodation that you own or rent, make sure the mortgage or the rent is 1/5 of your salary. Your transportation costs keeping lower, do you really need a brand new car while you can have a second hand car looking like brand new for ½ the price? Peoples would barely see the difference if you don’t tell them believe me. Also do you need all the new gadgets like the new tablet and electronics. A new version coming out every 6 months and the older version will be sold for a fraction of the price, you are in a lose/lose situation I am afraid. Have one of them and that’s it. All those brands and TV are propaganda and brain watching. If you need it it means that their marketing department had done a great job!
You Need A Financial Plan:
Financial Education play a major role on how to become wealthy. Not the get rich quick but solid foundation and education on the subject.
With the arrival of the internet you can get you a solid financial education online.
Books are also a fantastic way to educate yourself on the subject. The only thing that you have to do is to get into the mindset to study them and apply the principles that they are teaching you.
Be curious, ask question, get into forums and investor club, online groups and networking. Even if you don’t have a business it is always nice to meet and mingle with new peoples, get new connections and advices.
Groups are always very empowering and you will gain will gain confidence about the topics and learn new skills.
Some clubs you have to pay a fees, some are free, some meet over a lunch or dinner and you must paid for your own food but it is always worth it.
Financial independence
Set goals
goal -based investing
low risk / low stress
avoiding the big loss(es)
avoiding the trap of wanting the most
comparisons and benchmarks
reporting periods
gift giving
Requires planning and meeting plans. This is why goal-based investing is critical. Money is not the end goal, is a means to an end. If you just have a money goal, your goal needs more developing.
People who are greedy or miserly to maximize money are misdirected. Need to understand the pyramid and that self-actualization brings greatest happiness. Need to re-think goals
Budgeting*
Financial it could be person on TV, on the Internet, Facebook, newspaper, friend, family member etc…come up with at least 3 from each category and study what they do, if you can ask them to help you, reachable.
Declutter your place
How can you improve? (write a list) organize, implement
don’t sweat the small stuff and stop worried make money
Richard carlston
Your relationship to money matter, the energy of money, see video—to develop
What do you say to yourself?
I am always broke—rewrite script, emotion, fear, dirty, corrupted
I could get more of it, won’t hurt
Money, no problem
Burn your fear, make your fear vanished
Practice until it’s perfect
Money is energy will flow
It has a time not immedia, like a tree it need time to give its fruits so continue to trust, wave comes after
Go with the flow
Resistance reside the problem
No resistance no problem
Relax
Deep breathing
Great Meditation on Youtube:
HYPERLINK "http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HbHXqwomq_c" \o "blocked::http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HbHXqwomq_c" \t "_blank" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HbHXqwomq_c
HYPERLINK "http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e-6H3HUVUaY" \o "blocked::http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e-6H3HUVUaY" \t "_blank" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e-6H3HUVUaY
Google search Schumann Resonance Mediation, binaural meditations and sound it will explain the different frequencies you can use to achieve different states of consciousness, works also with the chakras.
Also:
HYPERLINK "http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4F6X9MAgZzg" \o "blocked::http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4F6X9MAgZzg" \t "_blank" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4F6X9MAgZzg
books and stuff to talk about like removing fears of success, failure, money etc... but for now I think it's a lot.
I also had the list of the things I don't want in a job, make sure you write the thinks you want in a job (opposite, negative to positive)
It's a long search for me almost 3 years if you do it by your own. You have to start what is interested you most in life, what you will gladly do for free if money was not an issue. For example I think you are interested in self development, so you can ask yourself what are the jobs in self development eg coaching, then if you like traveling, you like indian culture, you like..... complete a list then read true over and over again, you may have some insight coming or feelings
my personal list is:
I love self development ---> coach, yoga instructor, spiritual counselor etc...
I love traveling ---> travel agent, travel guide, hotel reviewers, blogger getting paid to make reviews on hotel and places.....
I love going out---> ....,blogger, paid review by advertisers.....,
I love Movies--> movie producer etc...
I love ________ ---> possible job title
Then if you select a few, imagine yourself doing that for the rest of your life, how does it feel....if it doesn't feel right, that's maybe something else, maybe in the same field but a bite different etc...
HYPERLINK "http://www.amazon.com/Coach-Yourself-New-Career-Professional/dp/0071703098/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1357501866&sr=1-2&keywords=career+change" \o "blocked::http://www.amazon.com/Coach-Yourself-New-Career-Professional/dp/0071703098/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1357501866&sr=1-2&keywords=career+change" \t "_blank" http://www.amazon.com/Coach-Yourself-New-Career-Professional/dp/0071703098/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1357501866&sr=1-2&keywords=career+change
Also if you go to amazon there is more books when you search career change in books, there are a lot, read trough a few books preview and pick the one that resonate the more with you. Books are so cheap those day, it really worth the time and effort to read and do the exercises suggested in most books on that subject.
For a more expensive option, what I would have done if I know it, it's having a career coach but I didn't even know that existed. I think books could be a good start to have more info and start to see more clear.
“Buddhist and Psychological Perspectives on Emotions and Well-Being,”…
“Buddhist and Psychological Perspectives on Emotions and Well-Being,”…
Eckhart Tolle, “A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose,” page 114-115.
The Art of Happiness, page 29.
Ebit 2, page 96.
Problem Solving Skills:
Problem Solving Skills
Many people have problems that they don’t address. One reason may be that they are the cause but their ego doesn’t want to accept responsibility for that. So they cover up the problem or find ways of coping, some of which may be unhealthy.
Problems create stress. Stress makes people sick in many different ways, both mentally and physically. It causes the system to be out-of-balance since it’s reacting to a danger or threat. Even cancer has been linked to stress.
Stress also restricts creative thinking, making solving problems more difficult. So it is important to rationally address problems when not in a stressed-out state of mind.
It is always possible to address problems, if you have the skills to solve problems.
What are the good problem-solving skills?
Identify the problem
Write down problems and discuss problems. Being a good communicator. Listening is very important.
A good technique in communication is to try to repeat back your understanding of the meaning what the other person has said to see if you first understand what the person means. Only then, should you respond.
It is equally valuable to ask the other person to explain their understanding of what you said.
If you can identify the causes of problems, can face and fix them. Don’t worry, if there is a solution, you can take it. If there is no solution, there is no sense in worrying.
Structure the problem
Breaking problems down into pieces. Some problems have many parts and are too complex to address the whole problem.
Look for Solutions
Have to be open mind to the causes of problems, as well as to alternative solutions that you might not consider at first, or how it may be that you usually address problems. Be creative. What is creativity?
What do other people do to solve the same problem?
Write down possible solutions and compare the pros and cons of each option.
Assess the costs and benefits and risks of solution v. doing nothing.
Make a Decision
Sometimes you have to be assertive in making a decision.
Implement the decision
Don’t stop until the problem is solved.
Monitor and obtain feedback on the solution
Give your solution time to work. But be open to changing the solution if it’s not working. Life is a work-in-progress.
Making Changes:
Making Changes
It’s hard. Takes 21 days or more to make successful changes. But everybody is different so the time it takes could vary a lot. Also depends on what is being changed.
Many habits include addictions. So there is a biological process involved. The addicting substance has to leave the body for the change to be feasible..
There’s a big psychological component to many habits that someone might want to change. For example, someone may eat a lot when feeling depressed and they want to change it because it’s making them fat. Eating is making them feeling more satisfied on a certain level, but is not treating the cause, depression.
For this to change, a person would need to find a positive response to feeling depressed. Perhaps going out and taking a walk in nature or doing something else uplifting but without the negative consequences.
The big effort is required at the beginning. When the change of habit goes into effect, then there is a short-cut in the brain.
Takes a lot of self-control not to go back to past patterns. Need to reward yourself if you make a successful change.
If you fail, keep trying until you are successful.
Motivation should be very clear and strong. Need to focus on the result.
Stopped drinking to improve health. If you keep thinking about your health, that will make it easier to change.
Changes to Triggering
People are often triggered into a series of responses and processes that occur over and over again. But the anger or sadness that results is causing them to suffer.
To change a response to being triggered, slowing down the escalation of thoughts is required. This requires becoming very mindful.
A trick is to focus on something that occurs without thought, such as breathing. When you focus on breathing, the mind can’t go to other thoughts.
This breaks the cycle and allows for a more compassionate response. However, as all change, the pattern must be broken many times until the brain is re-wired and the impulse to take the hurtful action not longer is automatic.
Resistance to Change
May be due to some painful or fearful expectations about what will happen if you do make changes.
Beliefs may be standing in the way. May need to change beliefs to overcome resistance. For example, if you want to stop taking medications because of the side effects, you may have to change your belief that medications are a healthy solution.
Some people in your life may not want you t change. So it takes extra effort to overcome their resistance.
Acceptance
The law of cause and effect says that if you keep doing the same thing, you will keep getting the same result. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a different result.
The first step to make a change is a accepting the reality of the situation: cause and effect. If you don’t like the result, you must accept that you must change whatever is giving the result.
Attitude
A positive attitude helps make the change possible. If you can visualize how the change is going to give better results, that will help.
Adjusting
Not going to be easy. But if you get positive feedback from the change, that will make it much easier to implement.
Observe a role model who is doing what you want to do.
Play close attention to your self-talk and self-judgment.
Action
Taking the first step can be the hardest. And sometimes it is the only thing that has to be done to get the process started.
Relapse and Temptation
You may be tempted to go back to the old way because it was so familiar or there was some part of the behavior that was enjoyable or ‘worked” on one level but not overall.
See it as a minor setback. Don’t be too hard on yourself.
Record Your Life Story and Change Your Future
Step 1 : I record how I am, where I grow-up, how was my childhood, what was my interaction with my parents, friends, teachers, what was my feelings at the time, what bad happened to me, why things are the way they are, why I don't have the interaction that I'd like to have with x,y,z....etc.
My recording on my computer was 90mins long from born until today.
Step 2 : Listen to that recording privately, over and over again until you are getting FED-UP with your story. I find out that I was recreating over and over again the same victim mentality and that I was not my story! It's like listening yourself from outside your head, having a different perspective.
I decide to step into the plate of my life. I am the only one that can manage my life, nobody else. You will find strength and courage now to set your goals and rewrite your story.
Pyramid Of Needs: (no text yet)
Pyramid Of Needs
Maslow’s Pyramid of Needs
HYPERLINK "http://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&frm=1&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&docid=w2QvoAjsSwOuKM&tbnid=-pLyNwC5AwMKHM:&ved=0CAUQjRw&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.talkingstory.org%2F2005%2F05%2Fstrengths-values-and-that-pyramid%2F&ei=X7g_Udv8MJDxyAGT-4Eo&bvm=bv.43287494,d.aWc&psig=AFQjCNFmUTnzblxeJ_FM6U3KtP44GmMxJA&ust=1363216830652879" INCLUDEPICTURE "http://talkingstory.org/site/wp-content/uploads/2005/05/pyramid_5.jpg" \* MERGEFORMATINET
Maslow's hierarchy of needs
This is a guide to assessing where you are now and where can go to experience happiness and fulfillment in life.
Most fundamental at the bottom (food, shelter, safety from harm) to the highest, self-actualization.
Safety and Security needs include:
Personal security
Financial security
Health and well-being
Safety net against accidents/illness and their adverse impacts
Sense of belonging
Friendship
Intimacy
Family
Self-Esteem
All humans have a need to feel respected; this includes the need to have HYPERLINK "http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-esteem" \o "Self-esteem" self-esteem and self-respect.
This relates to self-foregiveness because if you hold grievances, regrets, against yourself, you cant experience self-respect and self-esteem. Grievances are the baggage of thoughts and emotions.
Self-actualization
Reaching your full potential in life. Expressing yourself fully.
What do you need to feel good?
Reconnaissance
Money
Encouragement
Appreciation
Techniques you use to try to get them?
Is it working?
If not, why not?
What can I do differently?
Brainstorming ideas
Classified
Implementing
Taking action
Anchors?
Identify pattern
Setting realistic steps and huge goals
Why?
Fears of failure
Fears of success
Lack of motivation
Overwelming to start?
never been hold back again
your full potential
positive thinking
Identify your weaknesses
What are your goals?
What is important to you
What get you excited?
In search of a mentor/life coach/guide, so many good mentors and life coaches out there, I recommend you get one in each area of your life you want to improve, visit their website, sign up for their free material, video, reports, start to study the subject you want to be use too, familiar too, understand, master. Many of my favorites coaches and mentors with their best selling products can be find at the annex of this book…
Financial
Self Development
Goals Achievement
Business Mentorship
Life Coaching
Body Image Coaching
etc
-----
Do The Work, the time is NOW!:
Get your warrior outfit on!
Acknowledge your difficulties, be open to talk about it and ask different opinions if you can, the best answer for you will strike you inside, you will know.
The importance to clarify the areas you want to work on,
Did you know that you already known the answer? The answer is inside
Reaching your goals and your comfort zone
Doing the same thing over and over again without result will not work even if you get into the cycle again. Stop, step back, watch, observe, try an other approach
NLP teaches to look an object, in this case let’s say a goal, a problem or an idea on 5 different angles et write about it down. Then choose the best solution eg
Take your most current problem on your list
Circle here 5 answers, think about it overnight and during a few days
Work smart not hard, balance work, life, relationship, family, it’s a fragile equilibrium.
Where is your place in the whole dynamic
You friends family etc what do you think they think of you, is that true?
Define yourself, how are you?
What is my mission?
Monitor your progress, how to you feel today—middle of the book
What is the most important think that you learned so far, write it down in one sentence and repeat out load.
Replace negative script by positive
Timeline: Past—emotional language—Present---Future
Timeline therapy
Learn to live in the present only
Ok to be yourself
Be ok with your body, take care of your diet, accept the way you are, love yourself and be grateful for your futures even if you don’t like them, it will smooth the resistance that you experience and ease your mind to say, well I think after all I look the part.
write your life story, listen until you get a click fro example, I could step outside my head by listening to my life story recording and I was then able to find a behavior, or something breaking point awakening that make me chance the curse of my life, mentality, archetype, re write lamentation moving to a new past cab\n't be rebuild etc
Eg__ problem—what can I do about it---different answers—such thought, classified the ideas---implementation
Script: What is your personal script, are you award that you may have already scripted your life and that you are following exactly what you think about and are planning to be?
Your gut feelings is so alarm, Always ask your intuition, trust, it is right for me, does it resonating in me?
Mental Diseases:
The increase in senseless killings of innocent people at schools, shopping centers, and other places cannot be ignored.
More people today have mental diseases. Toxic bodies toxify the brain. From cell phones to airport security, the brain is microwaved often.
Chronic medications, such as anti-depressants, toxify, altering chemicals in the brain.
Children are vaccinated over and over starting in infancy and continuing throughout childhood. Food store chains offer shoppers ‘flu shots.’
The mind has also become more toxic from media, such as internet and computer games, to promote killing and destruction. Even if this seems innocent, this makes the mind less sensitive to reverence for life.
Data about mental diseases v. years ago.
Mild mental disorders
Mental behavioral disorders due to use of psychoactive substances
Schizophrenia, schizotypal and delusional disorders psychosis
Mood disorders
Neurotic, stress-related and somatoform disorders
Behavioral syndromes associated with physiological physical factors
Disorders of personality and behaviors in adult persons, children?
Disorders of psychological development
Behavioral and emotional disorders occurring in childhood and adolescence
Violence
Suicide
Teenagers
At risk because not fully developed brains. Easy to be manipulated by corporations in media to video games and modern society.
Substance abuse causes mental diseases in teenagers.
The Opposite of Mental Disease: Well Being
Positive evaluations of life include the presence of positive emotions, social ties, life satisfaction and meaning. Supporting these evaluations are the quality of relationships, resilience, satisfaction with life domains, and realization of potential.
If people have mental disease, reducing stress may be a strategy for reducing the effects of the mental disease by providing more hormonal balance. The consequence of reducing stress is to rebalance hormones.
Ways to reduce stress include exercise, meditation, social activities (for some), relaxation. Artistic and creative activities help a lot. Emotions need to be expressed, not held within, in a positive way or under safe conditions.
Emotions are feelings that need to be expressed. If they are held within unexpressed, they can harm us and grow and fester. Unexpressed emotions can be at the core of mental disease. Like a pressure cooker heating up, emotions held within can result in an explosive series of actions.
Relationships:
Yourself
Love/ man, woman etc.
Family (parents, brothers/sisters. Kids)
Friends
Business/ work
Social circle
Neighbors/community
Adversaries/competitors/enemies
Pets
Yourself
When many people think about relationships, they don’t think about the one with self. This is the most important. Creating a good relationship with oneself is fundamental to creating good relationships with others.
There are just a few general principles. But they may not be as easy as they sound.
An over-arching principle is self-love. If we can’t love ourselves, how can we love others, and how can we receive the love of others?
Loving oneself is going to take a few building blocks. Acceptance, non-judgment, and forgiveness are all paramount because none of us are perfect, and more than that, we often make a lot of mistakes and have many flaws.
If we just accept who we are, and where we are in our life’s journey, we are taking a big step forward. Self-acceptance is required for others to accept.
Non-judgment, or the suspension of judgment, is not attaching a good or bad value on what happens in life, recognizes that more perspective is needed to know whether something was fortunate or unfortunate. We need to admit that who we are and what we do is the product of more processes and events that we can ever find explanations for.
Self-foregiveness is the letting go of baggage from the past. As long as we hold onto it, we can’t truly love ourselves or others.
Romantic Relationship: Man & Woman, etc.
Consciousness and conscious behavior are non-religious goals of Buddhism. Being present, acknowledging what is, accepting yourself and others for who they are right now, are all a part of being conscious and being in a positive, romantic relationship with another person. Feeling emotions in the body, seeing your responses to emotions as a ‘third party’ within yourself, regulating your responses, help to define conscious behavior.
When your partner behaves unconsciously, relinquish all judgment. You may be totally free of reaction or you may react, but be in the space in which you may watch your reaction.
Instead of fighting the darkness, you bring in the light. You have created a space of loving presence which allows all people to be as they are. If you practice this, your partner cannot stay with you and remain unconscious.
If your partner decides to adopt this practice, you can then both express your thoughts and feelings to each other as soon as they occur because you are secure in not being judged or criticized. This prevents a “time gap” from developing in which an unexpressed emotion or grievance can fester and grow.
Learn to listen to your partner in an open, non-defensive way. Learn to give expression to what you feel without blaming your partner. Give your partner space for expressing him/herself.
Instead of taking mental positions against your partner, you will experience the bliss of a flowering relationship. You will reflect back the love you feel deep within. This is the love that has no opposite.
Family (parents, brothers/sisters. Kids)
Rivalry
Conflicts
Different generation gap
Family history
Violence abuse
Parents
Probably can’t change the relationship that parents created with their kids.
For relationships that were difficult, it probably means that the parents never did the work on the self-relationship, so naturally their relationships with their spouse and children were difficult and strained.
The best one could likely do is to understand that and find acceptance of what is and ultimately compassion for the parent who never developed a good self-relationship, followed by foregiveness to relieve suffering.
Siblings
May have more chance of working on these relationships. But there is not the same dynamic of choice to be together, as in a romantic relationship. Most people want to maintain the sibling relationship, but should choose to spend more of less time together, depending on how conscious the sibling is, and how rewarding the relationship is.
Kids
We have the most control over developing good relationships here. However, we have to remember that kids are not fully developed or as capable of deep relationships until they become adults.
A big variable is how the 2 spouses relate because about 50% divorce and many live in poor relationships. If the parents can’t or don’t agree on how to parent kids, they will be subject to mixed signals and this leads to more difficult relationships.
Friends
Unlike family or a romantic relationship, these relationships are the most subject to choice. They can be started and ended if both people are interested or if one becomes uninterested.
The satisfaction and value of these relationships depends largely on how friends evolve in their own relationships with themselves. Friends who are in a similar place in their journey or further along can enhance our love of life and sense of being connected in life.
Friends who cannot or do not evolve may remain ego-dominated and express jealously or superiority. At some point, we are better off exiting such friendships that might have been mutually beneficial at an earlier time.
Business/Work
These relationships are often the least subject to choice, depending on a person’s business situation. Often, there is a need to find a way to get along to do business, earn a living, regardless how evolved these people may be.
This requires a high evolvement and skills possible to be successful much of the time. If a colleague exhibits jealousy or superiority, walking away may not be an option, without great financial impact. Instead, it may require developing an understanding of the person, and an ability of non-reaction to their statements, or to take them personally.
Social Circle
People who share similar interests, who want to meet as a group. It could be superficial, such as a French gathering, or deep, like a Men’s Circle that meets every week for 3 hours to listen and be heard and be accepted. In all cases, the value of these relationships is being a part of a community.
Neighbors/community
Usually, we can’t choose our neighbors. Often, there are some who are hostile or destructive. Sometimes, we get good neighbors.
Just like business and work situations, we need to utilize skills of non-reactivity to those who would otherwise cause more disruption in our lives.
Adversaries/competitors/enemies
Often, competitors are very similar to us, that’s why they are competitors, doing something similar. If we reach out, these people can become friends. We just need to be sure to protect whatever competitive information that is necessary.
Enemies are usually people who are told by authorities to compete or conquer. People who survive capture with the least amount of emotional harm are those who recognize this and can empathize with the people who are directed to do something they wouldn’t do if not directed to do it.
Often, victims become attached to capteurs as a way to cope with the stress.
Pets
Reduce stress. Are non-judgmental. A good pet is accepting and loving. It also might be cute and soft to pet and hold. A safe friend
Relationship Building:
- Networking, interacting and getting accounted to people in this state
- It’s powerful, group or individual how understand from where you come from as they have been there before
Relationship and interaction
Is there a formula, mechanism for love?
Trust. Are you a trusted person, have you ever been betrayed and how to you feel about trust?
relationship issues
Commitment issues
Neediness
loneliness
Gap younger and older, womethe same comportment
Upset children
Honesty in couple
Communication
Time are changing, grand parents, parents, generation, divorce, recomposed family,
gay marriage,
Block
How to you feel when talking about love, write emotions
Think about it
Reframe? Rewrite script the way you want it to be use timeline exercise then come back at the present moment
Learn social skills
Make small talk
Meet new Friends
Meet a New Love
Consolidated and Strengthens Couples and Married
Dealing with divorce
--Avoiding toxic relationships
Could be family, friends, co-workers, etc., always saying what you should do, must do, controlling, manipulating, judging everything you do, and blaming you for their unhappiness. Not about you, about them. Making you wrong to be right.
Giving bad advice, negative.
How to deal with them: staying objective, recognizing their unconscious behavior; non-reacting, or reacting while remaining non-judgmental. As soon as you begin judging them or defending or justifying yourself, then you have fallen into the trap of unconsciousness.
If you cannot break contact from such people, you have distance yourself emotionally from them, seeing their behavior for what is: a product of an unchecked ego. You cannot fix them. They will not be able to stand your non-reaction. The ego needs a reaction to re-charge to reinforce their negative behavior to keep it going and spiraling down. Their ego will find a better target
The Dating World:
Love and dating online, advices cautions, safety rules
Be aware, research peoples on the net, bring a friend if you feel more comfortable for a first meeting…
Look your best, smile, be yourself
Shyness and social anxiety, nerves, etc, it’s ok to feel those emotions, just let them happens, watch them from outside, they will instantly vanished.
{dating, protect yourself}
Being proactive Meeting someone Dating online, be part of a club. Go to friends parties, amuni, charities, galas, bar and restaurants,
It is very difficult to start a new relationship of any kind if we have pre-made thought about a person or situation as well as generic thinking. For example if you are a chid from a divorced parents it may be difficult in the future to have an healthy and trusted relationship with your love partner. That’s where I like to include in this chapter than nlp could be a great way to re[program your thought about it.______Trust: accord trust until shown than not deserved, let the past hurt and judgment, generalization behind, until shown otherwise
Read Body Language: Do you know that is a skills that could be learned, that’s how it works, your brain and your body is connected by central nervous system that send impulse to the body, a visible muscle impulse is made from thought. Incontrollable to the person, detectable, analyze it, it’s like being able to read their mind, very powerful and very helpful in any situations, work, meeting, home, friends, dating, spouses, children etc
Learn to read other person emotions
Assertiveness
Follow Your Intuition/Trust your gut feeling
Mindfulness : being present with whatever you are doing
Live in the present only
Monitoring Progress:
- The other side
- Making progress
look for advices from others people that previously took the same road
Mental Diseases 2
Mental Diseases 2
The increase in senseless killings of innocent people at schools, shopping centers, and other places cannot be ignored.
More people today have mental diseases. Toxic bodies toxify the brain. From cell phones to airport security, the brain is microwaved often.
Chronic medications, such as anti-depressants, toxify, altering chemicals in the brain.
Children are vaccinated over and over starting in infancy and continuing throughout childhood. Food store chains offer shoppers ‘flu shots.’
The mind has also become more toxic from media, such as internet and computer games, to promote killing and destruction. Even if this seems innocent, this makes the mind less sensitive to reverence for life.
Data about mental diseases v. years ago.
Mild mental disorders
Mental behavioral disorders due to use of psychoactive substances
Schizophrenia, schizotypal and delusional disorders psychosis
Mood disorders
Neurotic, stress-related and somatoform disorders
Behavioral syndromes associated with physiological physical factors
Disorders of personality and behaviors in adult persons, children?
Disorders of psychological development
Behavioral and emotional disorders occurring in childhood and adolescence
Violence
Suicide
Teenagers
At risk because not fully developed brains. Easy to be manipulated by corporations in media to video games and modern society.
Substance abuse causes mental diseases in teenagers.
The Opposite of Mental Disease: Well Being
Positive evaluations of life include the presence of positive emotions, social ties, life satisfaction and meaning. Supporting these evaluations are the quality of relationships, resilience, satisfaction with life domains, and realization of potential.
If people have mental disease, reducing stress may be a strategy for reducing the effects of the mental disease by providing more hormonal balance. The consequence of reducing stress is to rebalance hormones.
Ways to reduce stress include exercise, meditation, social activities (for some), relaxation. Artistic and creative activities help a lot. Emotions need to be expressed, not held within, in a positive way or under safe conditions.
Emotions are feelings that need to be expressed. If they are held within unexpressed, they can harm us and grow and fester. Unexpressed emotions can be at the core of mental disease. Like a pressure cooker heating up, emotions held within can result in an explosive series of actions.
Sleep:
Sleeping is super-important. It’s part of leading a balanced, healthy life. Without proper sleep, people cannot function well and are subject to all sorts of complications and illnesses.
Often, teens and young adults do not recognize the lack of sleep as a health risk and self-abuse themselves. It is an important for adults to bring this information to their attention.
Causes and Effects of Sleep Deprivation
Research on the functions of sleep and dreaming is on-going and scientists still don’t have all the answers. What we do know is that not getting enough of he right amount and quality of sleep can be very detrimental to health and life itself.
The right amount of sleep that is needed varies by individuals and throughout life. It’s not a specific number of hours that counts, but it is about how rested you feel in the morning when waking up.
It also depends on how healthy a person is. During an illness, much more sleep is typically needed.
The simplest way to know if you are getting enough sleep is whether you get up still feeling tired or feel tired throughout the day.
Difficulty of falling asleep and staying asleep can have many different causes, from psychiatric disorders and psychological stress, a poor sleep conditions, an irregular sleep schedule, or excessive mental, physical or emotional stimulation in the hours before bedtime.
Sleep loss or debt causes mental, emotional and physical fatigue. As sleep debt accumulates, it takes a larger-and-larger toll on life. At first, this may be severe fatigue, but under prolonged periods leads to immune disorders to insanity and death.
Creating Healthy Sleeping Conditions
Physical, mental and emotional illnesses, such as stress and anxiety, lead to insomnia and sleep deprivation, which in turn, multiply the impacts of those conditions. Therefore, these underlying illnesses or conditions need to be addressed as a pre-condition to getting enough sleep.
Insomnia is often treated with sleeping pills. They ultimately destroy the melatonin in the brain and lead to addiction. This is only an “artificial sleep.”
Instead, insomnia should be treated through natural, behavioral changes, such as keeping a regular sleep schedule, avoiding stimulating or stressful activities before bedtime, and cutting out stimulants such as caffeine and chocolate. This includes watching TV, especially, the news or crime stories that go into your subconscious.
The sleep environment may be improved by relaxation techniques, such as meditation, a maasage, taking a hot bath, and regulating light, sound (such as soft music), temperature conditions to be most comfortable and relaxing.
It is also important to improve “invisible” long-term health risks by eliminating them from the bedroom, such as dirty electricity from computers and electronics, cell phones, etc.
Another ‘invisible’ health risk is the type of mattress, pillows and bedding is used. The popular mattresses, such as memory foam, are made of synthetic products that “off-gas” for their entire use. Buying an organic mattress, pillows and bedding is expensive but can last for over 10 years and allow you to avoid the toxic effects of the popular artificial products.
Naps
Listening to your body will usually give you what you need in a healthy way. If feeling too fatigued to work or too stressed or feeling negative, a nap might just provide the right solution. If you lie down and relax and fall asleep immediately, and wake up again in 10-20 minutes feeling revived, that is exactly what your body needed.
Dreams
Dreaming is a way to ventilate emotions. Emotions need to be expressed, and if they have been inhibited or withheld, this may be their way to find expression.
The brain will 'flush out' emotional arousal by creating a dream, or scenario, that parallels the real-life experience - a metaphor. By paying attention to these symbols (objects, situations, feelings) in your dreams, you may gain insights about your emotional state and what might be affecting you on the unconscious level
Positive Thinking:
“Change your thoughts, change your destiny.”
Research into the effects of positive thinking reveals to important conclusions:
Positive thoughts help people feel better and reduce the effects of stress related to negative or pessimistic thoughts. Being optimistic may even result in better outcomes in difficult situations.
Positive thinking patterns can be developed over time and offset or replace negative self-talk patterns.
Thoughts can be very powerful. Our bodies are wired to respond to our thoughts. It can’t tell whether the thoughts are “real’ or not.
Think of failing in some major way and notice how your body responds. You might notice stress, elevated breathing, and other physical signs associated with a negative event. Stress often makes people feel like they have few options and increases blood pressure and cause heart disease (see Stress chapter).
Then try thinking of accomplishing some important goal. Imagine how you will feel. You will probably get a taste of what it would be like if that really did happen.
Both feelings resulted just from changing your thoughts. Another important point: you were able to change from negative to positive thoughts by taking control of your thought process.
Possible Benefits and Value of Positive Thinking
When we have a ‘can do’ attitude, we believe that a solution is available and look for it. Compare that to someone who is pessimistic and thinks they are doomed. If there is a solution, who do you think is more likely to find it?
If a problem or obstacle proves difficult to overcome, who is more likely to accept and move on? The pessimistic person feels there are no good outcomes and may just sit paralyzed in self-pity or depression.
The optimist can take a failure in stride knowing better things lie ahead. The positive thinker wants to move into the space where everything is working again.
How to Replace the Negative with the Positive
Negative self-talk is common for those who have not worked on thinking positive. Yes, it requires some work and discipline. But patterns can be changed. And the beauty is that it does become more automatic and easier.
The technique is easier than it may sound. When you notice negative thoughts, you have to take control of the situation.
Simply knowing that you can imagine a better outcome allows you to do so. You might consider past situations which you feared but turned out ok to help you do this.
Appreciate all of the good things in your life and about life. This is going to change how you feel.
Then begin to imagine a successful outcome. How would that feel? It might help to verbalize or write to give your body more evidence of your thoughts.
Invest in your hopes. Your future reality starts with your thoughts.
Beliefs and Goals:
Your beliefs become your thoughts,
Your thoughts become your words,
Your words become your habits,
Your habits become your values,
Your values become your destiny.
- Mahatma Gandhi
As simple as it sounds, what you believe and what goals you choose will have powerful impacts on what you actually do and achieve. Yet, many people are limited by their beliefs and have trouble setting and pursuing goals that will serve them.
These important life skills are not taught in schools. So many adults simply don’t have the tools or guidance they need.
Beliefs:
We make decisions in the present, based on our experiences in the past, to have a better future. We do this by using our beliefs about how the world works.
This is why beliefs are so important. Change your core beliefs and you will change your life.
As a practical matter, beliefs are needed to avoid ‘reinventing the wheel’ each time we need to make a decision. And yet not all beliefs are created equal.
Some may be distorted from childhood experiences when our brains were not fully developed. Other beliefs are simply false or unethical. And some are held with little conviction, when more is needed, while others are held as facts, when they are not.
The question is whether our beliefs need to be improved, and if so, how. This is not an easy task.
The process starts by looking at facts and being open to different conclusions. This is one of the central objectives of this book: to open people to new and improved beliefs that will serve them better than their old beliefs.
Creating Your Own Reality by Design
To reach goals, you need intention, attention, attitude, and organization. Discipline is needed to follow each step.
First, visualize your goals and what achieving each goal would mean to you. Desire is the starting point of all achievement. You’ll need passion. Determine your level of desire for each goal.
Visualization also can involve going through the motions mentally first. For example, athletes do this with their sports, e.g., golf swing, baseball pitch, etc.
Make an action plan. Having a goal without a plan is fantasy.
It may help to map it out, going forward with steps. But also try working backwards from achieving each goal to see what steps were necessary to get there.
Think big but break goals into smaller steps. You’ll need to add timelines and milestones.
Celebrate reaching each milestone!
Stick to your plan until you have new information or beliefs (see above). Then revise to keep in touch with reality.
If a goal is based on improving a skill, remember the Law of Repetition: doing it over and over again will make you better at it, like an athlete how has to repeat his routine over and over again. You will get better at it every time.
Nevertheless, patience is a major key component in a world of immediate gratification, Most of the best things that happen to people are those who stay focused on the ball. Never let your goal out of sight.
The happiest people in the world are the ones that know what they want and are working toward their goals. Success is not an accident!
Mind-Body Connection:
What we do with our body--how we feed it, exercise it, rest it-- impacts our mental state in positive or negative ways. At the same time, our mental states, such as thoughts, emotions, beliefs, attitudes and mental images, have positive and negative impacts on how healthy our bodies are and feel. As a result, there is a complex interrelationship between our minds and bodies.
For example, thoughts about the future can cause great anxiety, resulting in high blood pressure, body tightness. Lack of sleep or food makes people feel negative or depressed.
Awareness of these interactions between the body and mind can lead to useful insights about how and why our body may be suffering,and how and why we may find ourselves in a negative state of mind. Listen to the physical or mental feedback you are getting. Is your mind cluttered? Is your body tense?
This knowledge can also be used to find strategies that can be effective in transitioning from a negative physical or mental state to a positive one. Your mind has to be de-cluttered and your body has to be free from tension to be able to operate together effectively to identify goals and develop strategies to accomplish what you want.
Mind-Body and Body-Mind Strategies
A wide variety of strategies have been developed using the mind to change physical symptoms and using the body to change mental states. Mind-body therapies and practices include behavioral, psychological, social and spiritual approaches.
Mind-Body Medicine
Mind-body medicine integrates medicine, psychology, nutrition, exercise and belief to enhance the natural healing capacities of body and mind. Mind-body medicine teaches individuals how to take control of their lives, use their own healing power to reduce stress and other negative behaviors and thoughts, and thus maintain or regain health.
Meditation
Meditation is a great tool to achieve peace and calm and helps a lot to treat depression, anxiety, and pains of all kinds.
A very important first step is to take an inventory of what your mind and body states are telling you. But this is very difficult without “listening” by carefully using your senses.
Seat yourself comfortably. Listen to the background sounds. Experience the pressure on your seat. Feel your feet on the floor. Become conscious of your breath. If you have thoughts, gently return to the background sounds and your senses.
Take your time. Repeat to yourself: “Right now, everything is fine. I’m happy. Nothing is a threat.”
A word of warning: when looking for mediation classes, be sure to avoid entities who may try to drag you into a cult or a sect. If possible, take a class with a friend who is wiling to try.
Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy
Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is an approach that addresses dysfunctional emotions, behaviors and thought processes through goal-oriented, systematic processes. This technique acknowledges that some behaviors cannot be controlled through rational thought. CBT is "problem focused" and "action oriented.”
Prayer
Many find prayer a good way to reduce one’s inability to control events and to accept what is. It can also facilitate self-forgiveness and forgiveness of others.
Creative Arts Therapies
Art, music, dance, writing can be used to elevate mood and feel more alive through self-expression. The inability to express feelings or emotions can lead to much mental anguish since feelings are thoughts that need expression.
Yoga
I recommend Kundalini Yoga. It helped me a lot when I was dealing with my career, and I was totally exhausted.
In this kind of situation, people don’t recognize that they are in big distress and that they need to take more time for themselves.
Relaxation or Sleep
A simple solution is rest. Being well-rested can be key to tackling issues and even routine day-to-day issues that can wear down our mental condition.
The relaxation response is a physical state of deep rest that changes the physical and emotional responses to stress (e.g., decreases in heart rate, blood pressure, rate of breathing, and muscle tension).
Your metabolism decreases
Your heart beats slower and your muscles relax
Your breathing becomes slower
Your blood pressure decreases
Your levels of nitric oxide are increased
If practiced regularly, it can have lasting effects.
Hypnosis
Is a technique that works with brain to modify behavior (e.g., stop smoking, improve performance). It can be done by yourself (with a CD, DVD, or script), or with a practitioner.
Hypnosis is finding the answer inside, asking your subconscious to resolve the problem or provide information that you can’t access at a conscious level.
Hypnosis can be coupled with subliminal affirmation. This is an idea that is put inside the subconscious.
Guided Imagery
Is softer than hypnosis. Creates a story to imagine to guide you to what you want to achieve.
Brainwaves
Helps by changing the brainwaves. Can stimulate the left or right side for creativity or focus, or put the two in better balance.
Timeline Therapy
EFT
Dealing with Failures:
Dealing with Failure
“Your failure may be somebody else’s success” – JK Rowling
Related to fear of failure and fear of success
May lead to taking only safe, conservative decisions/strategies.
What is success? What is failure?
Success can be defined as meeting a goal. Failure can be defined as not meeting the goal.
If set goals too high, may have a lot of failure.
If set goals too low, may have a lot of success but not much fulfillment.
But usually it’s commonly said that we learn more from failure than success. Often, early success can be ‘harmful’ in a way. Take it for granted.
“In order to achieve success, though, it is often necessary to first experience failure; hard-learned lessons are generally required.”
Have failure in life no matter what you do. It’s part of life. When it happens, have to learn from it.
Useful to remember than its not your circumstances but what you think about your circumstances. Its not the failure, but what you think about the failure.
Difference between failing being a failure. That is a judgment.
If fail at something, don’t hold on to it. Move on. Don’t identify yourself too closely with your successes or failures. They are things that happened. They are not who you are.
Some people may have fear of success. May relate to being in spotlight. Some people don’t want to be in the spotlight. Become a target. Jealousy. Want what you have. Sabatoge you. Steal. Exposed to bad side of life.
Do not fear failing or being judged. Don’t have to accept other people’s judgments.
Can be cultural. In US companies fail in seeking to invent, innovate. And failing is acceptable. Whereas in Japan, failing is losing face, so people don’t want to risk failure.
Don’t do same thing over and over and expect a different result.
May want to keep goal, but may need new strategy.
May need a coach to show you how to do it better.
Look for someone who succeeded at reaching the goal you want to reach and model after them.
Or maybe the goal requires a process that you find unappealing in some way…too boring, too difficult for the expected reward, etc. Goal may require acting maliciously (son cheating parents’ business to get the business).
“Success” can also be related to “good looks” because can cause jealousy and envy in same way as success.
A lot of success may attract evil in the world. Ex: John Lennon attracted demented killer who wanted to impress Jodie Foster for being the murderer of john lennon.
People in mansions have to have big gate to keep thiefs out. Protect kids from getting kidnapped/killed for ransom.
People become envious and ask for things.
Ego: elevates the other person to put you down one way or another.
Phenomenon of people kicking people who have failed. Again, ego driven. Makes them feel superior in a sick way.
Not going to be in your interest to have toxic people in your life. Need protection.
With big success, hard to keep ego in balance. But again separate who are from what you’ve done.
Example: Lose Weight
One strategy is crash diets. May try over and over and get an initial favorable but unsustainable. Need a different strategy that is sustainable long-term. One that allows you to eat enough food. Tastes good.
Stress:
Stress
High stress disrupts the normal functioning of the body’s systems by changing the way our body normally functions. Stress disrupts the natural balance—the homeostasis—crucial for well-being.
What Causes Stress?
Stress often starts early in life. Schooling creates stress for children to do repetitive assignments, obey bells, and do the work as instructed. Children are graded, separated into classes, and rewarded or punished if they do or don’t conform.
This is all training to become members of the workforce. The government and corporations want workers who will do as told. Children are trained to not think for themselves.
The military and civilian jobs use terror and fear to get workers to do things they wouldn’t otherwise do, and create more demands than the time or resources needed to meet them.
Beyond the work, there are many causes of stress in our lives. Among the highest are the loss of a significant relationship, whether through death or rejection. It could be a family member, spouse, partner or close friend. It matters more what the person meant in your life than the specific category.
Other major sources of great stress can be a significant illness or accident or other major, adverse change in physical condition. Major financial changes can be the source of great stress, especially if it affects living conditions and/or the ability to support dependants. Loss of job or work can be highly stressful.
There are many other sources of stress that are not as serious but can accumulate and lead to “burn out” of circumstances. These include noise, pollution, traffic, travelling, and may include family obligations and routines, even pets. We all know what stresses us.
Beyond these external causes of stress, most of our stress and emotional suffering comes from our mind - the way we think and face a situation. The thoughts that cause us stress are usually negative, unrealistic, and distorted. Stress related problem diseases coming from the future and mostly may never happen, such as fears of rejection, failure, being alone, poverty or sickness.
How Does Stress Affect Us?
Stress makes us sick. It’s not always as easy to make the connection to more complex chronic diseases, such as heart failure and cancer, but the evidence is there. It’s easy to see how stress causes back pain, stomach aches, sleeping disorders, anxiety, depression, insanity, suicide.
Studies show that between 60% and 90% of all physician visits are for stress-related complaints. Stress can cause or exacerbate conditions such as heart disease, infertility, gastrointestinal disorders, chronic pain, breast cancer, eating disorders, reproduction problems, and more.
It can also subtract years from our lives by speeding up the aging process. Resistance is the name of the game when it comes to disease. Stress is one of the most significant factors in lowering resistance and triggering the various mechanisms involved in the disease process.
How Can We Reduce Stress and Can We Prevent It?
There are many ways to deal with stress and some ways to prevent it from letting it impact us in such a devastating way. But some ways are not healthy and may only compound the problem.
The unhealthy ways are to “act in” or ‘act out.” Acting in may include self-destruction, such as with drugs or alcohol and other addictions, which may provide temporary relief but are not a solution. Acting out includes anger or violence toward others.
There are many good ways to cope with stress that are very effective: exercise, yoga, meditation, being present, letting go, forgiveness, relating to friends, emotional release, hypnosis, changing habits, thinking/helping others, healthy diet, being in nature, taking time for yourself, appreciating others, getting rest are among the many choices.
There are many ways to keep stress from being a killer or devastating illness. Recognizing and accepting there is a problem, that there is help available, reaching out for help, even helping someone else.
Reduce your exposure to stress, walk away from what is causing the stress. Breathing into it. Do something you enjoy. Watch comedy and laughing.
Creating a positive outlook, affirmations, visualizing success, Cultivating happiness and a love relationship are among the best ways to prevent getting too stressed in life.
By learning relaxation and stress management techniques, you’ll improve your overall health as well as your odds of living a disease-free life. There is no stress or worry in the present moment.
Cultivation Emotional Balance:
Cultivating Emotional Balance
We can make ourselves miserable without any help from the outside. We can be sitting all alone in a room and be consumed with feeling of hatred or jealousy. Conversely, at another time sitting in the same room, we can feel a sense of well-being.
These two examples show how our state of well-being comes from the inside, not outside stimuli. Our brain can turn anxiety into calmness.
How should we deal with "destructive" emotional experiences?
Finding inner peace, not harming others, can be learned, but it needs practice, discipline, and focus. Making compassionate choices, choices that make ourselves and others happier and our world a better place, is not as easy as it sounds. Our default mode of decision making, especially in situations of stress, is reactive.
When getting triggered by external or internal events, a cascade of reactive behaviors can get unleashed which are often unhelpful or even harmful. When we react to a trigger without mindfulness, old, unconscious patterns can become entangled with current sensations and emotions creating a momentum that is hard to stop.
A way to change this pattern, which will continue to recycle throughout life, is to slow down this process. The idea is to step out of the reactive cascade and mindfully and compassionately consider how to respond to the situation. By noticing the process of our reactivity, we bring awareness and deliberation to an out-of-control process, thus slowing ourselves down mindfully.
By pausing in the midst of a stressful situation, we can interrupt a reactive momentum and re-balance ourselves. Guided meditations can assist in this process. Now we can consider our situation with compassion and perspective and find wise and compassionate choices.
At first we might consider those choices in hind-sight, when we reflect back. With time, we are able to redirect ourselves with compassion and skill even in the heat of a hurtful moment. Now, new healthy habits of responding can emerge, which eventually help us to live happier and more meaningful lives.
Law of Attraction:
Law of Attraction/Setting Intentions
As we discuss in setting goals, the first step toward manifesting, is to create and develop thoughts. Nothing can be created that didn’t start as a thought.
If you think positive thoughts, you are going to see positive results.
Visualization of goals helps you see opportunities.
be careful what you wish for, because you might just get it.
but thus is not just a wishing exercise. Important to take action.
“Ask and it is given unto you.”
Attention
Action
“Be careful choosing what you want because that’s what you get.”
practice the LOA
Loa board
Loa video
Practice makes it happen
how does it work
what to visualize
visualizing board and movie (link)
60 days,2x30 mins a day
but I don’t have time
Building A Stronger YOU: (miscellaneous)
Who I am? Knowing Yourself:
In search on Identity: questioning yourself, what is my purpose in life, why I am here, what is my life mission, what may I am passionate about?
Understanding your place in the world
No one teaches you how you are
A Journey of self discovery: draw yourself in a sheet of paper in the middle and draw a bubble, answers around you, the question how I am. Keep positive and focus on negatives asking yourself if it’s really true, if it is, would I like to change, if yes, set an action plan to produce change and result expected…
Make example with software drawing..
Meet and greet yourself, a time to look inside and learn how you really are and understanding where unhappiness and difficulties comes from
Not knowing yourself are you surprise?
Irrational believes
This book is for now your most intimate quite trough your personal journey through your won story
--reducing outside influences
dealing with critics: constructive, pauses and think, jealous and irrational, discard
How many times have you eared the all say, you can’t do it, make you feel like crap about your decisions to keep control over you. Respond calmly that even you eared them, you are not following your advices and there is only their own opinion on the subject. Or say yes yes and do what you want anyway. Nobody should exerces influence and control over you, you are a free mind.
- - Criticism, be ok with it: I learned that the hard way, I consider myself to be a nice and helpful, dedicated and truthful person and why others peoples won’t like me or my actions, projects, etc… well after having been criticism all my young age over and over again for reason that could pretty much be driven my jealousy, I asked one day a close friend to mine.
He said it was to help me cope with the disappointment in life but was it really wanted to help me out here or was he/they just dealing with their own heartbreak. I think that anyone should be encouraged and empowered when having dreams and setting up goals and steps in their life.
Moving forward anyway, how else will know better what is good for you or not.
- Take the plunge
dealing with rejection
--reducing inner judgments above self and others / practicing non-judgment
(self-acceptance, forgiveness realizing it is just baggage on yourself)
Intentions => behavior => habits => your personal condition
Stepping Out Of Your Comfort Zone
Be your own life coach, be curious, develop yourself mentally, physically, push outside your comfort zone, love to learn, not afraid to adjust and changes. Connection from within. Start with inside then out.
Overcoming Bad Habits
Create new habits
Self Control: overwhelming feelings in control
While making changes in your life, you will confronted to a lot a resistance from your family, environment people in your life, try to distance yourself a bite from their judgment and keep early stages of changes for yourself, it will avoid to have you to justified yourself and being criticize to make you prevent you to change. Usually peoples in your life are comfortable with the dynamics they have with you positive or negative and will do anything to protect that security, well being and comfort. Remember it’s about you, not them, don’t let anyone telling you what you should do or not, it’s your life, be selfish and protect your own interest, it will pay off in the long term also a word of warning. When a relationship is not in balance anymore, it will likely to dissolve and create conflict, it is essential you understand that principle a step ahead a feel comfortable with that idea. It’s your own path, your own journey.
Journaling
Ventilating negativity
Acknowledge millstones and victories
The importance of journaling everything
It tahts’s time, what about a voice recorder, I pad , Iphone,technology makes it easy, your phone is in your pocket or purse all the time anyway. Try, listen regularly, it’s your map to success. It will drive you like a gps to your goal fasten than you can even imagine.
Happiness:
Happiness
“Your beliefs become your thoughts,
Your thoughts become your words,
Your words become your actions,
Your actions become your habits,
Your habits become your values,
Your values become your destiny.” ― HYPERLINK "http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/5810891.Mahatma_Gandhi" Mahatma Gandhi
The vast majority of people live in a chronic state of unhappiness, hoping to be happier “one day” when something they want to happen, happens. On the contrary, research shows that most of us are very poor at predicting what will make us happy. We think that if we have more of what we want, if we reach a new goal, if others recognize our success, we will be happy.
This is probably due to a very simple idea: most people don’t understand the nature or happiness or even realize it’s a skill to be understood and developed. The notion that obtaining more and more material goods and services or recognition will make us happy is bound to lead to unhappiness. The Dalai Lama has pointed out that if our wants and desires remain unchecked, sooner or later we will run up against something that we can’t have. That approach fails to recognize that genuine happiness is, after all, an inner state, how we view our situation, not our circumstances (to a very large degree). “Primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it.”
Thoughts generated by the ego and toxic emotions are the sources of our unhappiness. The ego is constantly talking to us, trying to be right, making others wrong. Once a person can recognize that this is the ego, and is able to simply observe what going’s on, the ego is no longer in control. This shift in perspective can happen instantly once a person becomes conscious of it.
The ego is also responsible for destructive, toxic emotions, such as desire, hatred and envy, as well as carrying grievances from the past. Human emotions cannot be avoided, but they can be observed as they occur and thereby be regulated.
The key to being happy is to shift back to the present, if pulled into past unhappy times or projected into fearful situations in the future. Check in and see if anything is harming you right now.
Compassion for oneself and others promotes genuine happiness. Research shows that volunteering with others to help others provides inner satisfaction and meaning to life.
His Holiness the Dalai Lama says, “If you want happiness, practice compassion. If you want others to be happy, practice compassion.”
Happiness:
As a way of being is a skill
Is a way of interpreting the world
An inner state
Suffering is a misapprehension of the nature of reality
Eliminate the sources of suffering to achieve happiness
Make yourself as big and vast as the sky to feel joy
Systematically blaming others and holding them responsible for your suffering is the surest way to have an unhappy life
Free yourself of mental toxins.
Happiness
Happiness: what it is, what it isn’t.
Find peace: there is many way you can access to peace even if your mind is always raising at 100 kms/h and you have more thought/ second that you can even handling. First you must acknowledge that our modern life is a very fast pace and the environment is always changing, our body and mind has to adjust quickly and 50 years ago it was more peaceful for most of people even if the conditions of life was a bite more rustic. Today sensitive persons can be unconsciously subject to a great deal of stress even if than person on the surface don’t notice anything, one day for a routine visit to the doctor he can find a tumor, cancer or other chronicle illnesses. Common symptoms are fatigues or even exhaustion, lost or gain of weight out of control, fussiness and dizziness in the brain, inability to concentrate. It is very important especially for busy professionals or mom at home who has a great deal of organizing the household to set aside some time for themselves like a walk or a run, a yoga class or a day of having lunch or shopping with girlfriends. If you feel that you are not really running the show and overwhelmed by the events and situations in your life, it is time to take a step back and reflect on how can I correct the situation,
Think of what make you happy in life, is it walking in the nature, watching the oceans, looking at a child playing, be with a special someone etc…try to make time to have more of the good thinks in your life
1.
2.
3.
name 3 of the thinks you like to do and make you happy
Be happy with yourself
No need of external eg bf, family, approbation, fears of judgement
moderate exercise such as walking;
Exercises, gym daily:
exercise plan
stick to it
what physical activity you like
what physical activity is possible for your body
oxygen your brain, cells body, diseases don't like oxygen and profiler in an environment that don't have that
various stress management techniques including yoga-based stretching, breathing, meditation, and imagery;
creative visualization: dream the impossible dream, pics, photo, define what you want to archive in any area of your life circle, rate, 1-100 % look at it every day and rate again and again, use computer and video if possible, do a private wall with images from Facebook, twitter, interest or flickr…get it private and look at your wall everyday, with some computer do short video with what could be your ideal life, watch 2 times a day matin soir et il manifeste tres vite laisse l'intention mirror will reflect back.
believes, desires, affirmations, record or write read listen gym etc affirmation daily
Happiness Explained
As a way of being is a skill
Is a way of interpreting the world
An inner state
Suffering is a misapprehension of the nature of reality
Eliminate the sources of suffering to achieve happiness
Make yourself as big and vast as the sky to feel joy
Systematically blaming others and holding them responsible for your suffering is the surest way to have an unhappy life
Free yourself of mental toxins.
Happiness
Happiness: what it is, what it isn’t.
Find peace: there is many way you can access to peace even if your mind is always raising at 100 kms/h and you have more thought/ second that you can even handling. First you must acknowledge that our modern life is a very fast pace and the environment is always changing, our body and mind has to adjust quickly and 50 years ago it was more peaceful for most of people even if the conditions of life was a bite more rustic. Today sensitive persons can be unconsciously subject to a great deal of stress even if than person on the surface don’t notice anything, one day for a routine visit to the doctor he can find a tumor, cancer or other chronicle illnesses. Common symptoms are fatigues or even exhaustion, lost or gain of weight out of control, fussiness and dizziness in the brain, inability to concentrate. It is very important especially for busy professionals or mom at home who has a great deal of organizing the household to set aside some time for themselves like a walk or a run, a yoga class or a day of having lunch or shopping with girlfriends. If you feel that you are not really running the show and overwhelmed by the events and situations in your life, it is time to take a step back and reflect on how can I correct the situation,
Think of what make you happy in life, is it walking in the nature, watching the oceans, looking at a child playing, be with a special someone etc…try to make time to have more of the good thinks in your life
name 3 of the thinks you like to do and make you happy
Be happy with yourself
No need of external eg bf, family, approbation, fears of judgement
Tools To Achieve Happiness
Become an acclaimed leader of your own life
Forgiveness:
Moving on
Crying to release it’s healing, don’t be afraid of that
It will release blocks
Exploring yourself, the physical, mental, spiritual body aura charrkras etc
*Forgiveness is a gift to yourself
The Art of Happiness, page 29
Conclusion On Lifestyle: (no text yet)
Important:
*Importance of a daily exercise routine
*Importance of a daily meditation routine:
taking time for yourself, meditation, setting goals, self development
*Importance of working on your goals daily
Conclusion On Lifestyle:
Eliminate emotional luggage in your mind
Eliminating clutters
Eliminating bad habits
Elimination unharmonious relationships
Understanding the self and the Ego
Coping Skills
Cultivating emotional balance
Love your job
Love your entourage
Work and private life should be in perfect balance
Meditation
Inspiration
Positive attitude toward situations
Visualize the outcome and results expected from a situation or a person
Understanding that it all start within
Setting goals
Maturity in thinking –non judgmental, forgiveness, acceptance, letting go, leaving the present,
Getting clear
Read be your own life coach, knowledge are in the books more than only on the internet
Importance to feel the child inside you and still have fun and excitement
Have faith in yourself and your ability to achieve anything your mind will set for
You have a free will, use it, don’t let external (relationships, friends, the economy) dictated your life
Education, meeting others peoples that follow the path of self development support groups, online communities likes facebook, yahoo groups etc
Its Ok to make mistakes
Follow your heart not your head
be patient
get your best interest first does not mean your are selfish, it shows emotional maturity and strength. Be yourself, don’t take yourself to personally, sense of humor and have fun during this journey. If you want to contact Natacha…and sign up for newsletter, classes, seminars etc
Your beliefs become your thoughts,
Your thoughts become your words,
Your words become your actions,
Your actions become your habits,
Your habits become your values,
Your values become your destiny.”
― HYPERLINK "http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/5810891.Mahatma_Gandhi" Mahatma Gandhi
What I think and what I speak is different, why? Cognition misalignments
Conclusion Lifestyle
Loving Relationship
Loving Career
Loving Self
Physical/Mental/Spiritual Alignments
your mental health pyramids:
Money
Relationship
career
time
hobbies
Work
Relationship
Family
Social
Personal relationship, family dynamic, career, environment, culture, social status
Synchronicity/New Opportunities
and enhanced love and social support, which may include support groups
Join a support group
Observe, listen, meet
Play a major role into that support group to help the newcomers with the issues
Notes:
Health don't come in a pills, it takes works, discipline, patience, nurturing, faith that everything is and will be all right.