S'More From the AP
Week Ending Sept. 9, 2016
Bullying: The Dreaded "B" Word- by Barbara Sutton
According to Texas Education Code 37.001, bullying is “any written, verbal or physical act that physically harms a student or damages a student’s property, or that creates an intimidating, threatening or abusive environment.” I’m sure all of us agree that bullying must be taken very seriously and dealt with immediately. However, in order to take action, we have to make sure “bullying” actually took place.
It’s surprising to me how often our students, as well as some parents, don’t understand that bullying is different from having a conflict with someone who is aggressive. That’s why we have to do a lot of investigating when we hear that “B” word. There have been so many times when I have told students that a child was “being rude,” but not being a bully! I hear the same thing from other LISD counselors, too. I’m trying to clear up some of the misconceptions about bullying, and I’ve given OSE teachers a poster about it.
My first lessons with all classes at OSE are about how to effectively communicate with others. I teach our students the difference between passive, aggressive, and assertive behavior. I call it “mousey, monster, and special” (from the book The Mouse, the Monster, and Me, by Pat Palmer). Most of our OSE students can explain these three types of behaviors. I teach them that a conflict requires a different response than bullying does. Bullying must be reported, but it’s possible to end a conflict with a win/win situation by using an assertive strategy.
It’s difficult for our students to differentiate between aggressive behavior and bullying when they are in the middle of a conflict. I think adults do the same thing occasionally. I know I have difficulty calling someone an “aggressive driver” vs. a “crazy person with road rage” when I’m in the moment!
So, what will we do about this dreaded “B” word? We will continue to take the allegation seriously, investigate it, and take action. If it is a conflict, we will mediate and teach our students how to deal with others respectfully and assertively, so they keep their dignity intact. Isn’t that what everyone wants and deserves?