The Whomper Gnome Theory

By Natalie Fornelli

The Whomper Gnome Theory

Do you ever wonder how you lose your possessions? Like, one minute it's there and then, POOF! It is gone. Well, I know the answer. And believe me, it is true!


There are secretly little gnomes called Whompers. They are the species of gnomes who like to steal and take stuff. Every second of every day they teleport to a random house anywhere, and take your possessions when you are not looking. Then they teleport back to the gnome realm, and give the stolen item to the King Whomper. The King then pats them on the back, which is the signal to go. And then they go back out. They do it every day of the year except for the King's Birthday, which is a very important day to the gnomes. So watch out. And no, I am not crazy. Like I said before, it is true!


You want to try to catch them? Well..... good luck with that! They are invisible, well, only if they don't want to reveal themselves. Whompers are also WAY faster than a cheetah and a strike of lightning. And only gnomes can get to the gnome realm, nothing other than gnomes and garbage and stolen items. You can try to use their weakness (*cough* pine cones *cough*) to make them paralyzed, and then catch one, but they are to smart to figure out what you are doing. Smarter than the wisest person on Earth. So, you probably won't be able to catch them.


Now you know the secret of disappearing items. Oh, and P.S : If you don't want them stealing your items, then place pine cones all over your house! There you go, you're welcome my fellow reader! May the knowledge of gnomes help you gain more knowledge of life.

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