The Newkingdom Times

the best times of ancient egypt

Whats happening

we are experencing heavy rainfall for the next 20 days so farmers beware you might not have the best crop season this season.



oh crop all my crops are dying


why is this rain happening now and now i got word that all my crops are dying. why are the g-ds doing this to us.

the Market

here are some stores that are in our new city market


Breaking news

there have been a report of a CATTLE NAP. if you see the cattle below please send a messenger over quickly.

there is a very bad crisis happening in the capitol.

Moses told me and i quote "let my people go" -ramgogan2

we have received word that there are many frogs in the area

we talked to a person who had one in his bathtub he said "i said ahahhahahhahahahhahahahahahhahahahhahahahahahahha frog get out ahqhhahahahhahahahah" -anonymous



if your wife has died by any of the following then you will like this girl.

-eaten by your cattle

-fell of a clif

-jumped off your house

-someone had her murdered

-cat literly got her toung

-she got eaten by a crocadile

-went swimming in the nile and never came back

where to send your kid to scribe school.


Branch Crest School

you should send your kid to school here there is barley any wrong done in this school and if there is then they are beaten. We serve your kids great food and lunches.

king Andrews

we are better than the school above we do everything that they do but we also do more.
this is not how St. Andrews and Pine Crest are today everything above is made up

The royals


King Tut has decided to change all religion back to the regular old religion today after priests and nobel men asked him and we quote "do you want people to like you, then change everything back to normal" he will now be known as t boy who said YES



i never liked the old religion it was to plane.


what will they now change our way of writing. they might as well we are always changing our religion back and forth.

these names has been changed for the protection of the people.


its hot

its very hot out side with a 99.9999999999999999999999999999999998½ percent of a sandstorm in the NE corner of the kingdom.

The sandstorm may kill an estimated 11 people

and will have 54½ mile per hour winds with very hard sand. it may be the weakest one of the season. :)

the new king

who knew

who knew that the new king liked to chariot race. King Tut has had alot of training for this race today it will be the first one he has ever done.

he also likes to hunt in the nile area but he still has no statues of hom when he was little. We beleave it might be because of the little incident that his father made but they are up and ready to make new ones of him and his mom.



i hate how all this kid does is say yes and now he is forgi......................................................... this message has been deleted.


Chariot racing

here are the standing for yesturdays race.

1. racer 1

2. racer 2

3. racer 24555233326636533

these are the final results for this season.


these are the final results of the final game of the season

1. hunter 1- killed 12 hipos

2. hunter23⁴36462346- killed 11½ (the last one died on its own after he shot it.)

things you will need

killer croc

when you go in the nile is there always that crocadile tring to kill you. then come on down to killer croc we kill the croc so you dont have to

the end

or is it................ :0