Are You Prepared To Be A Parent?

Skills Needed For Parenting

Skills that are required for parenting include good communication skills, patience, and discipline. Having good communication skills for a parent is essential as your child learns how to socialize with others throughout their life by learning how to interact curteously from his/her parents. Patience is also important because a child cannot comprehend the reason why they are being told to do certain things. It is better off to tolerate your child's tantrums rather than constantly screaming at him/her. Discipline is an important part of parenting aswell as children will constantly test their boundries throughout there childhood. Discipline will provide them with a direct understanding of consequences for certain actions.

Parenting Styles

Barbara Coloroso, a theorist on parenting styles, states that there are three types of parenting styles. Authoritarian, also known as brick wall, permissive, also known as jellyfish, and authoritative, also known as backbone. Authoritarian parents are known for imposing strict and rigid structure for their child. Rules for every aspect of life are provided aswell as complete control which is enforced with punishment and fear. A child will have little to almost no choice or participation in decision making and are known to be obedient without questioning the parent. Permissive parent style include the structure of their family to be shapeless. Permissive parents are usually raised by authoritarian parents, and the reason they choose this certain parenting style is because they do not want their kids to be raised the way they were. Permissive parents struggle to set set limits and rules for their children which results in having difficulty learning respect and responsibilty. Lastly, authoritative parenting style is similar to authoritarian, but with a bit of flexibility inbetween. Authoritative parents allow for clear and realistic expectations to be set for their children. Unlike authoritarian, a childs opinions and decsions are taken into consideration. Mistakes are usually looked as a chance to further learn. Children usually do not know what to expect because authoritative have a habit of swinging back and forth from being too permissive or too strict.

Factors That Influence Parenting

In the parenting world, there are many factors that influence parenting. The most common ones include emotional bonding, personalities, family dynamics, and parenting skills. To start off, a emotional bond between a baby and a parent is a very common factor that influences parenting. Getting attached to your baby, or also known as, attachment parenting, focuses on getting to know your child and their personal needs from birth. Responding to your child's needs and keeping him/her physically close is known as a way to build a stronger bond between the two. Attachment parenting also involves doing what works best for the parent and the child as one child's needs may differ from their previous children. Secondly, personalities play a role as a factor that influence parenting as it sets a tone for the relationship between the parent and child. A parents temper has a huge affect on how the two react to one another. A personality with flexibility is definitely key, as more than one child being raised in the same house may have different needs and wants. Furthermore, family dynamics are a factor that influence parenting as stress throughout your daily life has an affect on the way you parent your child. A disengaged parent often leaves their child feeling emotionally and physically neglected. The lack of consistent parenting leads to failure of setting boundaries and expectations which can also be harmful to the child. Lastly, parenting skills are also a major factor that influence parenting. A report that was published in 2003 points out that parenting is a skill that is learned and can definitely be improved through experience and further education. Many new parents may believe that parenting comes naturally, which is not always the case. Formal parenting education is a great help to building and improving skills for raising a child.

Family Planning Considerations

Although having a child may sound simple to many people, there are several considerations that should be given some thought before hand. First off, patience is key in regards to parenting. A parent requires patience as your child will cry, whine, complain etc for several reasons. Although there will be days a parent will feel exhausted, and fed up with being a parent, the way they handle this pressure is determined by the amount of patience they have within them. Secondly, raising a baby can definitely be financially expensive. Simple things such as a child's necessities, putting a roof over their head, providing food and paying bills can become financially exhausting for many families. The biggest consideration that many young couples may fail to give thought to is the amount of changes that come along with having a child. After a child, a parents life will never be the same as it was before the child. Dealing with the change can definitely become tough, especially for single parents.

Parenting Theories

Sigmund Freud

  • Theory states that child development is described as a series of "psychosexual stages"
  • Outlined stages as oral, anal, phallic, latency, genital
  • All stages involve satisfaction of a libidinal desire which later on in life plays a role in the child's adulthood

Erik Erikson

  • Theory states that human growth is achieved through focusing on overcoming a conflict
  • Success or failure determines how a adolescent deals with conflicts later on in their life
  • For example, failure to develop an identity results in role confusion later on in life
  • Sub-topics include cognitive child development theory and behavioral child development theories

John Bowlby

  • Theory states that early relationships with caregivers play a major role in child development
  • Continues to influence social relationships throughout life

Albert Bandura

  • Theory suggests children learn behavior from observing other people
  • Bandura believed that external reinforcement is not the only way children learn behavior
  • Observing helps child develop new skills and acquire information