The real truth none of that goddamn phony crap
The most phony school ever I swear
So let me start off that everything that people think about this school are wrong. I know I'm supposed to create a flyer for this school full of phonies but I'm not going write some goddamn lie about this depressing place they call Pencey. The first thing I'm going to tell you is that you'll never meet more phonies in your life. Take my word. Now the first detail I'm going to tell you is about the guys who go there. All of them either are thieves, cold bastards, or phonies. Like this one time I had these nice pair of gloves in my camel's hair coat, and someone just stole them one day. Like I said this stupid school is full of crooks. Now as I continue let me just say that the teachers at Pencey are terrible. I liked this one teacher though for History Mr. Spencer. He was alright he damn neared killed me sometimes. He was always cracking jokes he was a pretty smart guy too. But this one teacher Mr. Vinson I hated, everyone did I promise you. He taught this stupid class called Oral Expression. You had to stand up in front of everybody and tell a story without digressing, and if you started to digress at all everyone would yell digression. It drove me crazy. I hated that. Always yelling digression. I flunked that stupid class because I was yelled at a lot. I don't mind digressing though. But hey I mean this might just be the best school you could go to for someone who wants to jump out a window.
I remember meeting this lady, Ms. Morrow on the train one day after I finally left that outstanding school. The funny thing was her son was probably the biggest bastard that went to Pencey. He would always slap guys around with his towel after they would get a shower. But I just shot the bull with old Ms. Morrow for a little bit and told her how wonderful her son was. Anyway so unless you want to go to a school where you only can have a social life if your a jock,or in this stupid secret fraternity for phonies, I wouldn't recommend even walking by the dump. I'm a madman sometimes I swear I onetime got into a fight with this guy named Stradlater. He was a phony himself completely full of himself the slob. I was probably beaten down to a pulp. Everything at Pencey is about as great as getting shot or pushed off a cliff. I mean take my word the school will depress you.