Egyptian Weekly

"We Got You Covered, Egypt"

Hatshepsut "Steals the Throne!!!!!"

Breaking news, Hatshepsut has been hiding a heart wrenching story. Hatshepsut has been hiding that her brother has been the real pharaoh for a total of 21 years. Hatshepsut has been reported dead. The suspicion is building. Who killed Hatshepsut, her son, or a townsperson? More on this story as it develops.
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Gold is Low in Egypt!!

Have you seen the loss of gold? The price on golden jewelry will now be more expensive considering the circumstances of less gold. Miners are working 12 hour shifts to try to find more gold. Again we are running low on gold and gold will now be more expensive.
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Weathermen Predictions

Weatherman are tracking a sever weather storm. This storm contains heavy winds, sand and other minerals. We are predicting wind-speeds to about 35 mph. By next Monday be ready to seek shelter and have plenty of water and food. The storm can last up to 3 days-2 weeks. Be sure to guard your eyes so nothing can irritate them. Again seek shelter.
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Hatshepsut's Servants Grand Discovery!!!

Hatshepsut's old servants before her reported death have been digging and digging and finally made a brand new discovery. Hatshepsut brought bananas to Egypt. Bananas are our new favorite thing to eat. They are mushy, yellow,and they are good for potassium. Bananas are good to eat before and after working a hard and long day at work. If you have not had a banana there is still an opportunity to eat one. Get your banana from our farmers for two gold rocks today.
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Tutors for Teens

There is a new option for schooling in Egypt. You can get your private tutor. Our tutors are very educated and have a lot of capability to teach your kid to have a good and healthy life. We teach you to make good life choices and teach you all of the basic schooling things such as math, reading and writing.

Price: 5 gold bars an hour

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Chad's Chariot's

Chads chariots are a new chariot company with high quality chariots. We are having a sale. All chariots are 25% off. You can order your chariot online or call us. All of our chariots come with a complimentary horse.

Web sight: Chadschariots.com

Phone number: 555-555-5555

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Criminals Caught Weekly

Criminals can be mean can mean and greedy stealing all of your stuff, and lately this amazing team of undercover cops can catch any thief. They have been nominated #1 for criminal catching in the world. If you see anything suspicious call us at...

Phone number: 123-456-7890

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New Medicine to Relieve Back Pain

Do you have back pain? If so, try our new product called "relief." Our product can cause headaches, stomachaches, and eye twitches. Our product has been tested thousands of times and the result has been amazing. Fast acting relief in only 20 minutes.

Call us today at: 111-111-1111

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Filling Your Family

Orphanages have kids waiting for you take them home. If you can not have a kid, why not buy one for a very reasonable amount. Our children have been waiting patiently for a home. Don't forget if you do not buy your child by the age of 17 they get to live on their own.

Call us at: 111-222-3333

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Can You Solve the Puzzle?

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Comic/Joke

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