The cut that lead to many more
Haley Kyzer
The Start
The Feeling, have I finally lost?
The Razor, How hard could it be?
The Cut, No one will have to know
. It hurt a lot at first, but when I saw the blood bleed out of the little incision I had made on my wrist, I had the urge to do it more, so I cut and cut and cut and cut. After a couple cuts it didn't hurt. It was almost like my arm had gone numb. By the time I stopped there where bleeding cuts going up to my elbow on my left arm. I had blood all over my hand, my pillow, my blanket, and some drops on my floor. I didn't know what to do now, should i let it bleed? Should I bandage it up?
What to do next
Not letting anyone know
Finding out
Over coming Adversity
I didn't listen to anyone no matter what they would say. On December 31st 2013 something came over me, I decided that I needed to stop, it wasn't healthy and I was slowly killing myself. So I promised my mom, my family and friends that I would stop. as of today (Monday 10th 2014) I am 71 days clean, that may not be a long time to some people, but to me it’s a very long time, this is the longest I have gone without self-harm, at first it was hard, but it’s getting easier and easier. My addition will always be here, but it’s me who decides to act on it or not.
This has been my story on how I have overcome my addiction and adversity. I look at my wrist a lot and have urges, but I haven’t acted on them and I don’t plan to anytime soon. I don’t feel ashamed nor do I regret my history with self-harm, why? Because it has made me who I am today and I am the best I have ever been.