Coping with Loss
GriefWork: Healing from Loss
GriefWork: Healing from Loss


The Healing Pathway
The journey from Loss to New Normal is a long, winding, and complicated one. There are markers along the way to help you better understand the characteristics of the phases of the grieving process.
Keep in mind these symptoms are NOT checklists. These are some of the symptoms that some people feel some of the time. Every person's experience of grief is different and each has different feelings and reactions. Remember, the Healing Pathway is not a one-way or one-lane path. There is potential for a great deal of movement among the phases as we move towards a New Normal, which is constantly changing.
SHOCK- THE REALITY OF THE LOSS HAS NOT SUNK IN
Some symptoms of SHOCK:
- Disbelief
- Euphoria
- Numbness
- Searching
- Suicidal thoughts
DISORGANIZATION- THE REALITY OF THE LOSS IS REAL
Some symptoms of DISORGANIZATION:
- Aimlessness
- Anger
- Anxiety
- Apathy
- Avoidance
- Confusion
- Depression
- Fear
- Forgetfulness
- Guilt
- Hopelessness
- Isolation
- Loneliness
- Loss of Appetite
- Loss of Faith
- Loss of Interest
- Loss of Meaning
- Nightmares
- Physical Distress
- Preoccupation
- Relief
- Restlessness
- Sadness
- Sleeplessness
- Slowed Reaction Time
- Suicidal Thoughts
- Yearning
REORGANIZATION: REBUILDING A SATISFYING LIFE- New Normal
Some symptoms of REORGANIZATION:
- Changed Values
- Control Over Remembering
- Emergence of Balanced Memories
- New Choices
- New Meaning In Life
- New Priorities
- Pleasure in Remembering
- Return to Previous Levels of Functioning

Getting In Touch With Our Feelings
Mourners' Rights This handout is designed to help you understand your rights. Since this is a new experience, and because emotions are raw, it is sometimes confusing to know what is lay while mourning. | GriefWork Emotions The grieving process is difficult, and the number of emotions you might be feeling could be overwhelming. | Control It is important for us to realize the limits of what we can control. Remember the only control we have is over our own responses and how we react. |
Mourners' Rights
GriefWork Emotions

Activity: The Guilt
Finish the sentence-starters below that apply to you and this loss:
I'm sorry I _____________________________________________________________________________
I knew ________________________________________________________________________________
We didn't talk about ___________________________________________________________________
I wish _________________________________________________________________________________
I never should have ___________________________________________________________________
If only I _______________________________________________________________________________
How could I have _____________________________________________________________________
Why didn't ____________________________________________________________________________
I am angry ____________________________________________________________________________
I did not honor the request that _________________________________________________________
I still get upset about __________________________________________________________________
When I think back I ____________________________________________________________________

What To Do With My Memories?

Telling Your Story
Now, tell someone about your loved one. Describe the relationship you had with them. Think about and share what attributes that you treasured most about them.
If you can not find someone to share this with, call your counselor! We would love to hear your story.
The Importance of Self-Care
Self-Care Domains In each domain, list the activities you are doing to take care of yourself. If you do not know, check out our Coping Skills Smore for some ideas. | Are You Taking Care of Yourself? Use this self-assessment tool to help determine how well you are taking care of yourself and/or what are some new techniques for you to try. | Counting Our Blessings At certain times in our lives it is so easy for us to focus on the negatives and overlook what we have to be grateful for. List some of your blessings in the stars. |
Self-Care Domains
Are You Taking Care of Yourself?
The Importance of Relationships

The New Normal
New Normal, is not a place on the map, and it is not static- it is constantly evolving. Your personal growth experienced while journeying is a predictor of how dynamic the New Normal is- and what it will become.
It is our hope, that you will develop a sense of yourself as you are constantly learning, growing, and loving, in your New Normal.


Fran Zamore & Ester R.A. Leutenberg
Whole Person Publishing
Other Resources & Websites
Uplift Uplift offers an excellent grief resources page with comprehensive tips and advice for grieving children. | Children's Bereavement Center Located in San Antonio, Texas, the Children's Bereavement Center provides a ton of resources as well as small groups for children grieving the loss of a loved one. | Child Mind Institute Child Mind Institute offers an excellent grief resources page with comprehensive tips and advice for grieving children. |