The Solution to Child Obesity

and Increasing Young Peoples' Self-Esteem

The Problem

Society today tells us there are too many obese kids in America. My daughter is one of these "overweight" children and she is consistently teased at school. Almost everyday she comes home balling her eyes out because her tiny, underfed classmates make fun of her weight. This is lowering her self-esteem, along with many other kids in the US. By my standards, my daughter is one of the healthy kids in her grade. She is well-fed, curvy and beautiful. In fact she is probably one of the prettiest girls in her class, flab and all. (I don't understand why she wasn't casted on "America's Next Top Model" and she's only twelve.) As we are a wealthy politician family, she gets whatever she wants and should be an extremely happy student. In theory, she would be if it weren't for the stress her classmates put on her to look a certain way. This happens to more kids than only my daughter. With all the 80-pound-supermodel advertisements and the government attempting to place health restrictions on school lunches trying to starve our kids, the push for being thin and skinny is stronger than ever. There are many stories in the news where kids who have been bullied resort to violence. Otherwise, children who have been bullied can possibly end up deep in depression at a young age and do not do as well as they could in school if they were happy and accepted by everyone. Young students today should not have to worry about being compared to others and classified as a certain way.

The Solution

To solve the problem of kids being bullied because they are fat, we can create a new average weight of children. Skinny kids will be fattened up to make already obese kids look less above average. If more kids are heavier, then the standard average will also rise. Although this may slightly increase the chance for heart disease for my daughter's generation, at least they will feel better about themselves now. Because every child is required to go to school, schools should be the ones to focus on making kids heavier rather than trying to teach them to make healthy choices. It is the responsibility of the school and the government to change kids, not of the parents. Kids will much rather eat fatty, greasy, sugary foods, so it will not take any effort for the kids to eat the new meals the schools provide for breakfast and lunch. All schools, elementary, middle and high schools, will start serving unhealthy, but delicious foods. Parents will not have to worry about paying for "extras", like cookies and ice cream because these desserts will already be included in the lunch. Not only will lunch change, but breakfast will be forced upon every child at the beginning of the day, even if they say they've already eaten because we all know how children lie. The breakfast will consist of easy and fast foods, like donuts, bagels or chocolate, chocolate chip waffles. We must not forget about the second reason for maintaining a healthy weight: exercise. Kids at school do way too much physical activity. We can increase technology and minimize movement of kids by providing mobile chairs powered by electricity. The kids will never have to move for six hours everyday. Instead of the students getting out of their chair to ask the teachers a question, their desk will be mobile so they can move to the teacher without exerting any effort except from their hand. Sitting around all day also trains the young people in middle and high school for real life when they are stuck working desk jobs. Don't forget about recess also. This part of elementary school is preposterous and should be eliminated completely! Kids running around chasing the fat, nonathletic kids is demeaning to them. They always end up being "it" for the entirety of recess because they cannot catch anyone. We need to stop all of this inequality at a young age.

The Plan

The plan to enforce my solution is quite simple. Instead of spending money on making kids eat healthy, like taking away cheese at lunch and only serving "Baked!" chips, schools will spend an allotted amount of money on buying unhealthy food. Schools will also be able to purchase large amounts of food at a more discounted price because unhealthy food has enough preservatives to last at least the length of a school year. All the food will be microwaved or fried to be heated up. The cafeteria will no longer be serving anything "fresh", like fruits and vegetables because we can give our kids vitamin supplements to give them the nutrition they need to survive. Trying to get students to eat healthy food is very difficult, while getting kids to eat cookies, candy, fries, burgers and soda is much easier. Breakfast and lunch will be served in large servings to begin with, and students will be required to finish their plates before they can join their classmates in the classroom.

Schools will monitor weight gain each month. Like the standards our high school kids now have to complete to pass a class, kids will have to weigh a certain amount before they can move up a grade. Weigh-ins will occur just like on our favorite reality shows we want our children to look up to. At the end of the year, there will be a final weigh-in. These will be equivalent to standardized tests, like the MCA. If it ever gets to the point where kids try to rebel and deny eating the greasy, delicious food, it would be simple to get them to be obedient. School administration would force-feed the children through tubes. After a few times of this, all of the children will learn to eat all of the food they are given.

The Advantages

My logical plan has many advantages. First, all of our beautiful, beefy children's self-esteem will increase. When the plan works correctly, all of the students will be the same weight. Kids never look up to adults as role models; they only compare themselves to each other, so they will be the same in everybody's eyes. My daughter will finally get the recognition of beauty she deserves. Equal and standardized weight will also create more equality in the kids. Next, less money will be wasted on lunch kids end up throwing away anyway. We can give kids their cheap cheese back and take away the mushy green beans and disgusting apples. Parents will also be spending less money because their kids will no longer need to get the "extras" of cookies or Rice Krispie bars. Kids will be served a large serving to begin with, including, if not completely consisting of, dessert, so the need or desire to buy more food will no longer exist.

The Expedients

Everyday I have to deal with watching the silly, illogical plans on the news of how the government wants everyone to be healthy and lose weight. Things like mandatory physical activities and only serving healthy food at schools makes me absolutely sick. How can people be serious about those things? It sounds like too much work for me. The other idea that makes my brain hurt is trying to teach parents how to be healthy! It is the government's responsibility to change kids, not the parents. Although I am a politician's wife, taxing unhealthy food more and healthy food less would create a dent in my wallet. Also, serving smaller portions at restaurants would be ridiculous because I would just have to buy more food!

The Conclusion

There are many proposals out these days on how to solve child obesity, but none of them are solving the problem. My idea is brilliant and solves the problem for the long term. Although I may not be around for much longer because of all the possible diseases I could develop from my obesity, I still want my daughter's self-esteem to increase. There must be some way to help all children feel better about themselves, parents just need to agree on it.