The CPES BobChat
October 2, 2022
What Is "Nattering" and Is It Effective?
Nattering is repeatedly giving verbal but meaningless warnings. We, as parents and teachers, are pretty good at this. Here's what it sounds like: "You need to stop doing that." "If I've told you once, I've told you a hundred times to leave her alone." "I don't know what I'm going to do with you." "Haven't we discussed this before?" "If you do that again, then you're really going to be in trouble." "Stop it right now!" (I'm sure you have your own pet natterings that you might use.) If the word "nattering" sounds like the word "nagging" to you, then you have the right idea. Nattering is about our increasing frustration with our children's behavior. We want to be the good guy and don't want our kids to suffer from consequences. It could happen because we don't want to exert the energy that it takes to follow through. The US Department of Education did a million dollar comprehensive study and observed thousands of kindergarten through twelfth grade teachers. They looked for how many times a teacher "nattered" or gave a warning before issuing a consequence. They found that the average was 4.3 times. (I would argue that is true for most of us as parents as well.) Nattering really doesn't work because it is focused on us as adults rather than our children. We own the problem more than our kids do. We get more and more upset as we issue another natter. Our blood pressure goes up. We become more frustrated and agitated. And, the behavior doesn't change. So, what can we do? What's the answer? Out of the US DOE study, researchers found that the most effective teachers did one simple thing to change a child's behavior. They gave children warnings with clarity of the consequences if they did that again...and they followed through. Know that it wasn't the significance of the consequence (i.e. "You will be in detention for a week," or "I'm sending you to the principal's office.") but the fact that there was one. For most teachers who did this well, it wasn't a major repercussion, there was simply something that happened. For example, for a child who talked lots in class, the teacher may say, "If you continue to talk to your peers, you will move to another seat." If he/she continued to talk again, he/she was moved. "If you don't clean up your table at lunch, you will have to stay and do that instead of going outside." If they didn't clean up then they didn't leave the cafeteria. The natural, meaningful consequence happened at a lower level rather than resorting to a big, major consequence. The "time" fit the "crime." That interaction happened when the adult and the child were functioning at lower levels of emotional intensity. Simply put, it is "nipping it in the bud" rather than allowing it to grow to become a full flower or an out of control bush. For all of us, this is an easy say and a hard do. It requires us to have the emotional energy and maturity to be consistent and to think ahead what appropriate, meaningful consequences might look like. This really is the better path for changing children's behavior. (One might argue this could be true in other relationships, too.) It effectively transfers the ownership of the problem to the little person creating it. It helps set good boundaries for our children that ultimately enables them to be most successful.
Strength and Blessings,
Mr. Maness
Notes and Reminders
1. Bobcat Dash Sponsors--We will have our annual Bobcat Dash Fundraiser on Friday, October 28, 2022. This is a "fun run" that is our major fundraiser for the year. Because of the funds raised last year, we were able to purchase turf for our large playground which ensures that our children can play outside more days and in a safer manner. We also were able to install a concrete sidewalk for a tricycle path on our kindergarten playground. Please consider becoming a sponsor for our Bobcat Dash so we can continue providing great opportunities for our children at Cherry Park. You can click on the button below for all sponsorship information. All sponsor logos are due by Friday, October 7. Thanks for all you do to support your child and our school. All donations are tax deductible given that our PTO is a 501c3.
2. Elementary Honors Choir Members Selected--Congratulations to Alonnah Coxton, Lily Jenkinson, Lilly Black, Jordan Maynard, Bayleigh Knight and Kyrin Scott who were CPES students selected for the District Elementary Honors Choir. We are proud of all the students who tried out.
3. School Improvement Council--The CPES School Improvement Council serves as a sounding board and parent input mechanism for helping our school become the best it can be. We are soliciting nominations for the School Improvement Council Ballot. Terms are two years and you must have a child at Cherry Park. If you are interested in having your name on the ballot, please click on the following link. Nominations will be accepted through Friday, October 7. Currently, Paloma Fernandez Sanchez, Brittany Jensen and Anitra Meeks will serve this year because they were elected last year. We will elect four new parents to the SIC. Here is the SIC Nomination Link: https://forms.gle/soTWxKKWYwY3QAWb6
4. Every Kid Outdoors--Parents of fourth graders, did you know that your child can get a free National Park Pass for this year? Passes can begin being used September 1, 2022 and are good through August 31, 2023. Kings Mountain National Military Park is the closest location to Rock Hill where passes are also available. Of course passes can also be obtained at other park locations. For more information, click on the following link: https://everykidoutdoors.gov/index.htm You can also click on the button below.
5. Books a Million Donation--We want to thank the Rock Hill Books a Million who collected books for students at Cherry Park Elementary. These books will be used with our English as a Second Language students to help improve their reading. See picture below.
6. Taco Tuesday--Thank you to our PTO Teacher Appreciation committee for providing "Taco Tuesday" this past week. We are so blessed to have your support. Thank you for all you do to encourage our teachers.
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School Calendar
October 7--Fifth Grade Field Trip to Winthrop Coliseum; SIC Nominations Due
October 14--Early Release Day (Students Dismissed at 11:00)
October 17--Professional Development Day (Student Holiday)
October 23-28--Red Ribbon Week
October 28--Bobcat Dash
Previous Newsletters for 22-23 School Year
"What Do Parents Need to Know about Student Attendance?" September 25, 2022 https://www.smore.com/7rnbq
"What Do We Control?" September 18, 2022 https://www.smore.com/qv3hb
"What's the Goal for Our Children?" September 11, 2022 https://www.smore.com/q8k0b
"What Do You Do If You Want to Visit for Lunch?" September 4, 2022 https://www.smore.com/2ha8b
"How Was the First Week?" August 21, 2022 https://www.smore.com/t65yv
"What Do We Need to Remember as We Start Back?" August 14, 2022 https://www.smore.com/qjucf
"Open House Reminders" August 11, 2022 https://www.smore.com/35c6a
"Remind Me, Who's New at Cherry Park?" August 7, 2022 https://www.smore.com/b71ef
"Where Are the Pinch Points?" July 31, 2022 https://www.smore.com/csh32
"How Can You Help Us Keep Our Children Safe and Secure?" July 24, 2022 https://www.smore.com/6bweq
"How Can We Get Ready for the Fall?" July 17, 2022 https://www.smore.com/hcp2q"What Do We Need to Know" July 10, 2022 https://www.smore.com/y35p6