The newspaper times

It's All In The Name

Newspaper created by: Landon Leuschner

Advice collum-You're Problems Solved- With Jonathon Mckhewsiewut

Dear Jonathon:

My daughter has been having troubles with school. I fear that there is a boy in her life. Please help. Signed: Scared Mother

Dear scared mother: You should talk to your daughter. Make her do homework before leaving, after school. therefore she will be forced to not be able to see a boy she may be with, and her school grades should increase drastically. Signed: Johnathon

Delirium The Movie. Next #1?

Delirium The Movie is a must see. It is a gripping thriller and a great love story. When Lena meets Alex at he evaluation she falls in love. That is not good. In Portland love is a disease. She gets the delirium. When her and Alex try to run away to the wilds, it turns to tragedy.


Quote: You can't be happy, unless you are unhappy. - Lauren Oliver

Local Party Busted

Late last Saturday a large number of minors where busted at a party. Local authorities apprehended a number of people who had been drinking. They sent dogs in to the house to attack. Only a small portion of the people where brought in, but others are suspected by whiteness.
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HELP WANTED!!

Please come work at the EZ mart at 123 easy st. We have had a couple of job openings recently. We pay well and have reasonable hours.

The New eye-phone 12

With it's giant screen, and it's "Retina" display it is bigger and better than ever. Get yours now. (only $600)
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