BREAKING NEWS:
All Cats Have Disappeared. Everywhere.
WHAT. Where is my cat?!
Many San Diego residents woke up this morning to find that their beloved furry little humans to be completely gone. Joe Momma, an eyewitness, stated "It just seemed like my Kent Karlsburger Jr. had just gone up and left! Just POOF and gone, y'know what I mean?"
Scientists across the country have thrown themselves into investigations and researching the phenomenom.
Scientists across the country have thrown themselves into investigations and researching the phenomenom.
NO, REALLY WHERE IS MY CAT?!
The most popular hypothesis among the top heads of science believe this was just a Kitty-Rapture. Simply, it was their cosmic time to go, as chosen by the mytical powers that be. Others, mainly Dr. Keinsen Von Doom, a celebrated fraud and loon, is pushing forward the crack-pot theory that cats were never real in the first place, just some sort of creations of our psyche.
DON'T PANIC. WE ARE WORKING ON IT.
Jerry.
Have you seen Jerry?
Thomas the Pur-Engine
Tom Cruise's personal cat, have you seen him?!
SIR KIBBLES, LORD OF THE UNDER-WORLD
HAVE YOU SEEN SIR KIBBLES, LORD OF THE UNDERWORLD? PLEASE. WHERE IS HE?