Falcon News
February 2019 at Jefferson
Principal News
Can you believe that we are done with February! Through our monthly Character Education program, we focused on Compassion and the March focus will be Self-Esteem. I would like to kick the “Self Esteem” month off by giving a big shout out to some strong artists that have won awards recently. Isiyas Garcia, Zainab Shirzad, received “Special Recognition” in the 2018 Holiday Card Contest hosted by the BSD. Other artists that had their work chosen to be on display at the District Services Center were Sabirin Abdullahi, MaryKate Schmelzenbach, and Belen Hamson. We have serious students that produce beautiful art works here at Jefferson!
Anthony Spencer continues to be the only student to hit 100 miles in our daily lunch club. Way to go Anthony! The following is another installment of “Love and Logic”.
Many parents and educators struggle with feeling disrespected by their kids or students. Does this resonate with you? Do you ever find yourself thinking, “Why does this kid think it’s okay to treat me like this?” or “I go out of my way to treat these kids well. Why do they act like I’m stupid?”
Disrespectful behavior (eye-rolling, arguing, defiance, lying, etc.) is often a form of limit testing, which is a young person’s way of asking this important question: “Do you love me enough to provide the caring boundaries required to keep me safe from myself?” When limits over respect are inconsistent or weak, disrespectful behavior increases. The child’s self-concept suffers, and they lack the modeling required to learn how to set limits with their peers.
The ability to say “no” to peers starts with experiencing
“no” from one’s parents.
Those familiar with Love and Logic know limits are most effectively provided when we describe what we are willing to do or allow, rather than trying to tell others how they should behave. Describing our own actions provides an enforceable limit. Dictating the actions of another does not.
“Treat me with respect!” is unenforceable.
“I’m happy to do the extra things I do for you when I feel respected” is enforceable.
Is it okay for a parent or educator to calmly and consistently provide perks only when they feel respected? Absolutely! In fact, it’s essential. While our children certainly won’t thank us in the short term, we can be assured that doing so provides the type of limits and security they need.
A Love and Logic mom recently described how she began the process of gaining her thirteen-year-old son’s respect:
Son: “It’s time for you to take me to practice. Why are you just sitting there?”
Mom: “Oh, this is so sad. It’s just really hard for me to want to do the extra things I do for you when I keep hearing how dumb you think I am.”
Son: “I was just kidding! Why do you make such a big deal out of everything? It’s time to go.”
Mom: “Maybe by next week at this time, I’ll feel better about taking you. I sure hope so.”
She held firm and experienced the predictable onslaught of arguing, pouting, and guilt-trips.
“Over the past few months,” she reflected, “I see him becoming a lot calmer and more respectful. I think he’s realizing that I care enough about myself to expect respect. It’s really improved our relationship!
After raising my three boys, I feel that I can honestly say that parenting is the most challenging job there is! Being consistent and teaching lessons can be so tiring in the short term but if you hang in there and do what is best for your kids rather than what they want you to do, you will all win in the long run. Have a fantastic March.
PTA- COLLECTING BOX TOPS
NO SCHOOL NEXT WEEK
Please make sure to check out the Jefferson web page and click on CALENDAR for the latest schedules and events happening. http://jefferson.boiseschools.org/