Bennett's Book Nook II
I first learned one of life's great pleasures, watching other people work.
* He is talking about when he was a kid and he would ride with his dad while he worked.*
I like the way it (a bookstore) breaks down into fiction and nonfiction. In other words, these people are lying, and these people are telling the truth. * He is saying that people that lie are like fiction books and people who tell the truth are like non fiction.* Some people actually cheat on the people that they're cheating with, which is like holding up a bank and then turning to the robber next to you and going, "All right, give me everything you got, too." * He is saying that they are worst then the person cheating. I've come to the conclusion that there are certain friends in your life who are always your friends and you just have to accept it. You see them even though you don't really want to see them. You don't call them, they call you. You don't call back, they call again. You're late, they wait. You don't show up, they're not upset. You try and stab them, they understand. *He is saying that certain friends wont go nowhere no matter what you do.* I wish I was a phone machine. I wish if I saw somebody on the street I didn't want to talk to I could just go, "Excuse me, I'm not here right now, If you just leave a message, I can walk away." *He saying hw wish he could just put people on hold if he didn't want to talk to them.* Everybody in New York City knows there's way more cars than parking spaces. You see cars driving in New York all hours of the night. Its like musical chairs except everybody sat down around 1964. *He is saying there is no parking spots in New York City * Which is really crushing our lives more? Paying the taxes or doing the taxes? I think it's close. *He is saying paying taxes is crushing our lives.* According to most studies, people's number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death. Death is number two. Does that seem right? That means to the average person, if you have to go to a funeral, you're better off in the casket than doing the eulogy. *He is saying you're better off going to a funeral dead then actually going for the service.* To me the hardest part of being a professional football player is on the one hand you're a millionaire on the other they blow a whistle and you have to run around after a football. * He is saying football players make millions for just running after a ball.* Take boxing, the simplest, stupidest sport of all. It's almost as if these guys are just desperate to compete with each other, but they couldn't think of a sport. So they said, "Why don't we just pound each other for forty-five minutes? Maybe someone will come watch that." * That boxing is just two people fighting and seeing if people would watch it.* Some people you can't shush in a movie theatre. They're talking and talking, everyone around them is shushing them, and they won't shush. No one can shush them. They're the "unshushables." * That Some people wont be quiet even if everyone is telling them to.* I have no plants in my house. They won't live for me. Some of them don't even wait to die, they commit suicide. He is saying that he cant keep a plant they die too fast.*
Gym class was another little brush with fascism. *He is saying gym class felt like a fascism country.*
“It s amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper.” *He is saying that there is so much news its crazy how it could all fit in a newspaper.*
Top Ten List
According to most studies, people's number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death. Death is number two. Does that seem right? That means to the average person, if you have to go to a funeral, you're better off in the casket than doing the eulogy. I find this funny because you would think death would be number one as most feared and people are scared of everything else.
Which is really crushing our lives more? Paying the taxes or doing the taxes? I think it's close. I think paying the taxes is crushing our lives because we would want to spend that money on other things.
I have no plants in my house. They won't live for me. Some of them don't even wait to die, they commit suicide. Plants are hard to keep up with and sometimes they die before you can even take them home.
I'm at the age now where the roles reverse with my parents. I go shopping with them it's like trying to organize little ducklings. They're wandering all over. When you're young your parents are always looking for you in the supermarket, now its them you're looking for because they wonder off to much.
Gym class was another little brush with fascism.
Back in elementary school and middle school gym felt brutal because of the non sense they make you do and made the teachers feel superior to the kids.
"It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper.” So much happens on a daily that its amusing how much actually gets put in a newspaper.
Everybody in New York City knows there's way more cars than parking spaces. You see cars driving in New York all hours of the night. Its like musical chairs except everybody sat down around 1964. After living in New York City I know that this is a fact, so many people drive and there is just not enough space for them all to fit.
I wish I was a phone machine. I wish if I saw somebody on the street I didn't want to talk to I could just go, "Excuse me, I'm not here right now, If you just leave a message, I can walk away." Even tho most people don't have an answering machine, this would be useful today because so many people try and talk to me and I won't have time or busy.
The Theme Jerry Seinfeld uses the most is Socializing.
Seinfeld covers socializing in more than one chapter within his book suggesting that this might be one of the main themes of the book. The first time Seinfeld mentions socializing is in the first chapter, Freeway of Love, in which he examines dating at length. Seinfeld finds dating quite difficult, especially the idea of taking a woman to a restaurant. Seinfeld discusses the inability to eat like he normally would during a date, his unconscious need to devour bread in front of a strange woman, and the awkward moments at the end of the date when he does not know whether or not he will be invited up to the girl's apartment. The second time Seinfeld discusses socializing is in the chapter, Paldom. In this chapter, Seinfeld talks about his relationships with friends. Seinfeld finds the answering machine quite useful in these relationships
Best Seller/Discount Shelf
Seinlanguage is a book of observations exploring the everyday life through the humorous eyes of Jerry Seinfeld. The book covers everything from dating to traveling to friendship. Seinfeld includes such things as the tension that often occurs on a first date to the comfortable rapport between his parents, married for many years. This book is entertaining, written much like Seinfeld's standup comedy, and allows the reader to visualize Seinfeld delivering the jokes in person. It is a book all of Seinfeld's fans are sure to enjoy.
Dating is a difficult situation that Seinfeld likens to a job interview. A couple must move into a relationship while learning everything about each other, rather like owning a new car without the benefit of an owner's manual. Eventually the relationship ends and the couple is left with the pain of hurt feelings. Seinfeld thinks this could be avoided with cards, such as those from a children's game, which would allow a person out of a relationship for free. Personal maintenance is another aspect of human nature Seinfeld finds amusing. The differences between the way a woman takes care of herself versus how a man does are numerous. Seinfeld thinks that women have a great way of shopping for clothes that men do not share.
Seinfeld next focuses on friendship, discussing how men have relationships contingent on the next pretty girl that comes their way. Seinfeld also discusses gift-giving, friends he does not want, and the awkwardness of having friends with new babies. In Shut Up and Drive, Seinfeld shares his observations on travel, including car travel, the subway, and airplanes. Seinfeld speaks directly to airline attendants in the end of the chapter, begging them to please stop waking passengers up in order to serve them food.
In Job Security, Seinfeld admits he has never held a proper job himself, but explores his observations of various occupations. Seinfeld seems to like law enforcement best, thinking how cool it would be to have the authority to tell people when they have done something wrong. Being a clown is at the bottom of Seinfeld's list and unemployment is the most difficult job, according to Seinfeld's observations. In The Thing is the Thing, Seinfeld explores people's need to own stuff. Seinfeld talks about money, about theft, and about the media, particularly television. Seinfeld finds television to be most entertaining, although he does not like shows that are "to be continued" and public service announcements.
Out and Back is a chapter where Seinfeld explores things he does outside of his home and things he does inside. Seinfeld talks about trips to the movie theater, sporting events, and the opera in the first half of the chapter, while the second half centers on his personal habits inside his apartment, such as his compulsion to be neat, but his dislike of cleaning. In the final chapter, The Ride of Your Life, Seinfeld explores life in general, beginning in childhood, through the influence of parents, to the final steps in a person's life. Seinfeld sums up neatly, describing death as a person's need to move often and search for boxes, the final box being a person's coffin. Great Book.