The Importance of Teaching No
Why We Should Teach Children How to Accept No
Articles for Parents
Books & Videos
PreK-2
Grades 3-5
Games
May I Have Your Seat Please? https://drive.google.com/file/d/1W9n7luoE5n9BoE1hc6V2knF8Bjp00bO_/view?usp=sharing
Interventions
Teach How to Accept No
First/Then Visual Support
Offer an Alternative
Count and Mand (Stop, Count, Prompt)
Count and Mand is an educational intervention term that means Stop, Count, and Prompt. You can use Count and Mand when your child wants an item that is available, but they are asking inappropriately (i.e. tantruming, yelling, demanding, etc.).
After your child makes their demand inappropriately, say "Stop _____" or "Be quiet."
Once they stop engaging in the inappropriate behavior, begin a count to 10 out loud, in your head, or on your fingers. Your child must be behavior free for 10 seconds, otherwise, the count should start over.
Once the count is complete, prompt your child to ask for what the want or need appropriately and deliver the item.
If you use the intervention multiple times but the child continues with the inappropriate behavior, you may want to quietly walk away especially if frustration is increasing. Once the child becomes quiet, you can prompt them to make their request in an appropriate manner.
The video below is an example of using Count and Mand.
Walk and Peel
The walk and peel intervention is used when your child asks for something that is not
available at the time of the request. After your child makes a request for an item or activity, say no. If they accept no, provide verbal praise and move on. If they begin to engage in problem behaviors, walk away. If your child begins to reach or grab for you in any way, “peel” way from them and ignore the behavior. It’s very important that you don’t engage in a power struggle at this moment or think you need to rationalize your answer.