Twas the night Santa went crazy!!!

By Noah Kinney and Kessler Speigle

Twas the night Santa went crazy!!!

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse. But something was stirring in the mind if santa. After 364 days since last, Christmas just working and slaving for spoiled kids. Santa, having just about enough of christmas,had to relax. So he sat on his leather couch, and started to drink some, a lot of eggnog, to help him relax. Then he got letters from some boys named Sam Miller and Billy Mast. When he found the letter, he sighed in relief of something finally good happening to him. Santa, who quickly became shocked,started reading the letters and found out that they had sent him letter stating “Hey Santa we don’t think you’re real, no one that stupid and fat can be real. WE HATE YOU!!!!”. Then something started to occur in Santa, something that has never happened before. His top lip started to twitch, his hands started to shake. Then he got from his chair, grabbed his machine gun that he normally uses to protect the north pole, and went into the elve’s workshop and began his murderous rampage. After that, he ran out of bullets and grabbed his flamethrower, and went to the reindeer stables and cooked himself some dinner for the his ride to deliver all ‘presents’ to the children of the world. He looked up and heard sirens from the police and quickly loaded his slay up with bombs, guns, knives, grenades, and anything helpful for his murderous rampage. Wanting to make sure his slay had enough bombs, he made the one elf that he spared check the slay. Santa, fearing the elf missed something, killed him and checked the slay himself. The first house he was going to was in Wooster, Ohio to the houses of Billy and Sam and their presents were going to explode when they opened them in the morning. They had five presents with one bomb in each of their presents. With a crooked laugh, he swooshed down the chimney and placed the presents under the tree. He traveled house to house just laughing away as he unloaded bullets on to people’s houses, burning christmas trees, and eating all of the cookies that everyone left out from him. When he least expected it, he started to hear sirens. He looked over his shoulder only to see an incoming chopper, he started to laugh at the sight of it. “We’ve got you surrounded! Surrender now and-” the officer in the helicopter was cut off as Santa shot at the helicopter. Then war broke loose between cops and Santa. bullets were flying, children were crying, and nothing was peaceful. As Santa was shouting uncontrollably a bullet wizzed over to his big belly and struck him down. He fell with a big thud. Hours later, his bullet wound was being tended to in his new maximum security prison. Once healed, he is to go to court to decide whether or not he should go to death row. The judge decided not to send Santa to death row, but instead to keep him in the maximum security prison for the next two-thousand years. He will have a few years for rehab, but no matter what good he does in prison, there is still no telling what he may do once he gets out.


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