Falcon Press

April 2018

Principal's Thoughts

Here we are in the middle of Spring with the grass and flowers growing and water in abundance. Spring is a time to rejuvenate and renew our surroundings and ourselves. In the “Love and Logic” approach to life, few people set out with a written plan for getting themselves mired in dysfunctional relationships with their friends, relatives, coworkers, or kids. Why… then… do so many of us find ourselves struggling with manipulative people who mistreat us? Why do so many parents grieve because the children they love aren’t motivated to love and respect them back?

Part of the answer involves the fact that many of us failed to learn what healthy, loving, and respectful relationships look like. While most of our parents did the very best they could, many of them were themselves struggling with learning these lessons. Young people of my generation turned on our transistor radios and heard, “All you need is love.” We hoped that the Beatles were right.

It wasn’t long before we found out that love… at least as we understood it… was definitely not enough. We wondered, “What’s love got to do with it? Maybe Tina Turner was right.” Now younger people have Reality TV.

What’s the net effect? More and more people of all ages are looking for love in all the wrong places... and in all the wrong ways. Healthy love and healthy relationships have two components we rarely find combined in television, movies, or popular music:

· Unconditional caring

· Boundaries/Limits

Please don’t misunderstand! I struggle, too. Few of us are truly immune from the cultural confusion.
Fortunately, Love and Logic provides a practical template for healthy love and healthy relationships. The message of empathy communicates unconditional caring while at the same time communicating the fact that we are not Captain Codependent to the rescue. We all need help managing the art of empathy. An example that I heard at the last “Love and Logic” workshop went something like this:

I keep getting mad when I give consequences. I get mad at my daughter, and then she gets mad at me. I almost got to empathy last week. I was so close. My daughter didn’t study her spelling words. I kept hearing your voice during your last lecture when you said, “These can be great opportunities. Don’t balow them by nagging.” So I didn’t nag. I also heard your voice saying, “The school will provide the consequences. You can balance them with an equal amount of empathy.” She came home with a “D” on her test, and I did a great job of being sorry for her. I said, “Wow! It must really be embarrassing to get a “D”.

She got real quiet, thinking hard about what she had done. It was great! Then I heard your voice in my head saying, “When you run out of things to say, transfer the problem to the youngster by asking a question. “Wow! What are you going to do?” With the saddest little face, she said, “I don’t know what I’m going to do.” I had her owning her own problem and thinking hard.

And then ... I just had to do it. I don’t know why, but I just blurted out, “And you’re not going to that party on Friday!” That did it! She started yelling, “What do you mean I’m not going to the party! It’s not my fault I got a “D”. You should see the words that teacher gives! She never gives us any time to study and ... it’s just not fair.” Isn’t it amazing? It only took one remark for me to change my daughter from a thinker to a fighter.

It helps to remember that using anger, threats, and lectures rarely works with children. Parents need to combine consequences with empathy. Those who deliver consequences in loving, firm tones find this far from easy. But it works.

Taking good care of ourselves by setting limits communicates that we respect ourselves enough to expect respectful treatment from others.

In a nutshell, Love and Logic shows us how to remain compassionate and powerful at the very same time.

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Bingo Night Information - Click Here

Mark your calendars. Also, pre-sale tickets for the raffle starts 4/9/18

Bingo Night Raffle List - click here

As of 4/9/18 here is a list of raffle prizes. List will change as items are received so updated lists and information will be sent home with students

Jefferson Web Page

Always check the Jefferson Web Page for the latest calendar of events. There are a lot of activities happening the next two months.

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Volunteer Week is April 16th so a BIG THANK YOU to everyone that comes to help our students