Haas Elementary Staff Bulletin
May 2015, Vol. 1
Teacher Appreciation Week
Actually, there are a number of activities/events in store this week to celebrate our staff:
- Daily drawings for Applebee's or Chili's gift cards.
- A yummy luncheon sponsored by the Haas Elementary PTO on Tuesday - all staff are invited.
- A little something special from the administrative team will also be available in the lounge on Tuesday.
... and there will be other surprises. Have a wonderful week!
Real-Life Teacher Stories
After a coworker had finished his English lecture and his class had filed out, a tenth grader stayed behind to confront him.
“I don’t appreciate being singled out,” he told his teacher.
The teacher was confused. “What do you mean?”
“I don’t know what the ‘oxy’ part means, but I know what a ‘moron’ is, and you looked straight at me when you said it.”
—Jannie Smith, Ashville, Alabama
I recently asked a student where his homework was. He replied, “It’s still in my pencil.”
—Larry Timmons, Surprise, Arizona
“Don’t do that,” I said when one of my first graders playfully draped a dollar bill over his eyes. “Money is full of germs.”
“It is?” he asked.
“Yes, it’s very dirty.”
He thought about it a moment. “Is that why they call people who have a lot of it ‘filthy rich’?”
—Elizabeth Webber, Prospect Park, Pennsylvania
Jimmy had trouble figuring out when to use I instead of me. Then one day, while creating a sentence in front of the first-grade class, Jimmy haltingly said, “I … I … I shut the door.” Realizing that he was right, he jumped up and down and shouted, “Me did it!”
—Susan Williams, Portland, Indiana
My sixth-grade class would not leave me alone for a second. It was a constant stream of “Ms. Osborn?” “Ms. Osborn?” “Ms. Osborn?” Fed up, I said firmly, “Do you think we could go for just five minutes without anyone saying ‘Ms. Osborn’?!”
The classroom got quiet. Then, from the back, a soft voice said, “Um … Cyndi?”
—Cyndi Osborn, New York, New York
On the last day of the year, my first graders gave me beautiful handwritten letters. As I read them aloud, my emotions got the better of me, and I started to choke up.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I’m having a hard time reading.”
One of my students said, “Just sound it out.”
—Cindy Bugg, Clive, Iowa
During snack time, a kindergartner asked why some raisins were yellow while others were black. I didn’t know the answer, so I asked my friend, a first-grade teacher, if she knew. “Yellow raisins are made from green grapes, and black raisins are made from red grapes,” she explained.
One little boy suggested, “Maybe that’s why she teaches first grade, because she’s just a little bit smarter than you.”
—Erica Coles, Watertown, Tennessee
As I welcomed my first-grade students into the classroom, one little girl noticed my polka-dot blouse and paid me the ultimate first-grade compliment: “Oh, you look so beautiful—just like a clown.”
—Priscilla Sawicki, Charlotte, North Carolina
“I got called the g word,” sobbed a third-grade girl.
“OK. Let’s calm down,” I said, kneeling beside her. “Now, exactly what were you called?”
Between sobs she blurted, “G … g … jerk!”
—Steve Wright, Orangevale, California
When one girl had finished the English portion of the state exam, she removed her glasses and started the math questions.
“Why aren’t you wearing your glasses?” she was asked.
She responded, “My glasses are for reading, not math.”
—Kathy Olson, Roselle, Illinois
Our assistant principal called in one of my underperforming Intro to Spanish pupils to ask why he was having trouble with the subject.
“I don’t know. I just don’t understand Ms. Behr,” the boy said. “It’s like she’s speaking another language.”
—Marcia Behr, Indiana, Pennsylvania
The fish tank in my classroom was brimming with guppies. So I told the kids they could have some as long as they brought in a note from home. That’s how I received the following: “Dear Mrs. Swanson, Would you please give Johnny as many guppies as you can spear, as we are going to bread them.”
—Sheryl Swanson, Billings, Montana
During a parent-teacher conference, a mother insisted I shouldn’t have taken points off her daughter’s English paper for calling her subject Henry 8 instead of Henry VIII.
“We have only regular numbers on our keyboard,” she explained. “No Roman numerals.”
—Lisa Rich, Milledgeville, Georgia
A note from a student’s mother: “Please excuse Chris from reading, because he doesn’t like it.”
—Roy Hartley, Elberton, Georgia
When her child’s towel was stolen during a school swimming trip, an irate parent demanded of my mother, “What kind of juvenile delinquents are in class with my child?!”
“I’m sure it was taken accidentally,” said Mom. “What does it look like?”
“It’s white,” said the parent. “And it says Holiday Inn on it.”
—Heather Lauby, St. Louis, Missouri
Scene: History class.
Question: Name a famous explorer.
—James Parks, Red Lion, Pennsylvania
Question: How can we show respect to others?
Answer: If you have a piece of meat, you shouldn’t give it to anyone else if you’ve already licked it.
—Janaye Jones, Mesa, Arizona
Question: What does right to privacy mean?
Answer: It’s the right to be alone in the bathroom.
—Deborah Berg, Colorado Springs, Colorado