Angels, Peaches, And Dooms Day.

How do they mix?.....They Do not.

Joan of Arc : Joan of Anonymous

11412-1431 Joan of Arc, or Joan of Anonymous? The fact is, she didnt know her own last name, because her father and mother werent married and she couldnt choose wich last name to take. Although, she is known for one thing, and that is her extreme faith in God and her intuition. The clairvoyant young lady claimed that she received messages God and angels. She used her passion of christ and beliefs to lead her and her people to success.

...So what did she do?

Not only is she holyer than thou, but she also has indured more than any men of her time could fathom. Because Charles VII couldnt handle the job, Joan of Arc held herself responsible for leading his troops in the Orleans to fight the hundred years war agaisnt the english. There were many battles along the way, but she braved them all and led her army to victory. After all her hard work, she was congratualted by being captured and tried as a heretic. She was burned at the stake and burried alive on May 30, 1431

Why should we care?

Joan of Arcs intuition is the reason France exists today, because if she hadnt decided to lead the French army into war they would have lost and the French empire would have fallen. Since her death she has been present in modern literature, studys of psycology, and she became the symbol of French patriotism. Those of Catholic faith know that Joan of Arc became a saint after her death. 

"If i am not; may god put me there; and if i am, may god so keep me." - Joan of Arc

King John aka: Peachy King

Born on Chrismas Eve in 1167 died in 1216

...You mad dude?

King John was actually know to be a very angry man. Most of his hostility came from the jealousy he held toward his brother Richard, as a child. People spoke of him to be very greedy, violent, and short-tempered. He wasnt trusted by anyone, not even the Pope!
Horrible Histories - King John Online

Who Peed in his Cornflakes?

During the 100 years war, King John helped Charles VII become King of France. Although, fighting or leading in battle was not is forte! He was involved in many battles during the French Revolution and won none of them. He would be loosing so bad that he didnt even try to save his own land. He did, however, accomplish one good deed that started and finished his reputation as King of England. Greedy he was, King John didnt often think of his people before he thought of his own wealth. The citizens were so sick of living in poor agony because of him, so the Great Barons forced him to sign a treaty called "The Magna Carta" to ensure that he will stop stealing taxes or property without peoples consent. He considered the idea a great inconvenience.

Interesting facts about the guy:

- He had 5 kids.

- It is said that he died from poisoning from eating peaches.

- He was held responsible for the killing of his nephew Arthur.

- He developed a death sentence that involved bashing old mens heads with lead blocks.

- Suprisingly, he did care for some poeple. He feed over 1000 poor people a year, and committed jews into care.

"Pitiful and Pittied by none" - King John

William the Conqueror aka: William the Bastard

1028-1087. Ruled England for a whopping 21 years

William the Conqueror was strong-willed, courageous, and a hint of violent. He had an attitude that spoke "trust-no-one". As a child, he experienced gruesome things and was constantly being moved to different castles over night. Given his past living conditions, he was forced to be mature about things. His father was Robert, Duke of Normandy. His father and mother were never married, so William was considered a bastard (hence his lovely nickname).

You know his name, not his story.

William became Duke of Normandy at age 8 when his father died and he took over the throne. The people of England and many lords didn't want William to rule, because of his young age and bastardness. He was continually being threatened to be killed, but he kept being strong and the haters failed every time. One day, William had a get-together with a man called Edward the Confessor. During his nice stay with him, Edward promised William that he will take his place as King of England when he passed away. The day came, and William planned to Edwards promise for granted, but there were no witnesses to say that William wasnt lying about what Edward told him. To make sure he got what he was promised, William had to fight Harold in the Battle of Hastings. He won, of course. His first and biggest accomplishment starting his title as King of England, was establishing tax regulations through the use of a feudal system. His feudal system was expressed and extended into the Doomsday Book.

AWW, He's cute.

William was actually of viking descent, and just like his ancestors, he spoke dutch and little english. He was somewhat effeminate, because he despised of criticism of his mother and he was very insecure about his weight. William the Conqueror wasnt too bad of a guy. He was tough, inspirational, and easy going. For what its worth, he kept a nice tempo in England during his rule. Unfortunately, he suffered a horrible funeral where his limbs fell off, his body exploded, and the church was burning to flames in the process. He must have had an interesting time watching that from above!
Horrible Histories - William the Conqueror's Funeral

"The rare case where the conquered is very satisfied with the conqueror." - Konrad Adenauer