Modest Proposal

Molly & Elizabeth

The Problem

The social situation that we want to reform is unemployment. The problem is that there are too many people in the United States unemployed. Why is it such a hard thing to go out there and get a damn job. Too many people are lazy and unattractive and aren't able to get a job. This is a really big problem for our society because people need to support their families and without having jobs it is impossible for parents to do so. We should care about the problem because it's looking bad for America's economy.

The Proposal/The Soution

What would you do if you were unemployed? Where would you get money to pay your bills and how are you going to feed your family? The satirical solution is going to be liposuction and cosmetic surgery for people who are unattractively fat and can't get a job. People who are unemployed and can't get a job will go and get the surgeries done on them. The surgeries takes up to five years until it is done. Doing surgeries on people isn't such a bad idea isn't it ? All we are doing is just cutting your face and making some parts of you smaller or bigger. So more people would look the way we want them too. They will also have to pay an amount of money in order for it to be done.

The Plan

The plan is that people who are unemployed can go to a concentration camp for liposuction and cosmetic surgery. Since there is 3 million people unemployed our camps only hold up to 1,000 people at a time. There is 10 camps located in the United States so that means that 10,000 people can get surgeries done on them. With there being 10,000 people in surgery there is going to be 2,990,000 people unemployed. That lowers the unemployment rate. When they are getting the surgery they would be monitored to make sure that no one leaves. Once you are in the concentration camp there is noway of getting out. When you commit to the plan you have to stay all 5 years until you look good enough to get a job. Once they are out they are guaranteed a job. The way our plan is going to be monitor is when the unemployed get a job they would have to pay us back within the next 6 months for the expense of the transformation. If you don't pay us back then we will hunt you down and undo your surgery.

The advantages

The major advantages of my proposal would make the unemployed attractive. By the unemployed going to a transformation concentration camp they will be surgically and emotional trained to be able to get a job. The camp will provide liposuction and cosmetic surgery, the liposuction will take care of The United State obesity issue and will help these lazy folks who doesn't want to exercise lose weight and have enough energy to work. The cosmetic sugary will help the employer; why would you want an ugly person working at your business? A person whereas God has overly exaggerated a feature on their body possibly couldn't get a job, the camp is going to give cosmetic surgery on them and they're going to get a job afterwards. My other advantage will guarantee there be jobs, instead of going through all of these hectic schooling and fiance why can't the whole United State move to China or India? That’s where all the companies are heading anyway. By the unemployed people going out of the county this will decrease the unemployed rate in America. Since almost everybody is unemployed in America this will be great we wouldn't have to deal with nagging brats. These advantages are outstandingly justified because it will decrease the unemployed and help people feel better about the self physically and help them travel around the world in search for a job.

The expedients

Effects of unemployment are social not just economic. Frequently crime rates rise as people are unable to meet their need through work. Divorce rates often rise because people can not solve their financial problems. The rate of homelessness rises, as do the rates for mental and physical illness. Homes are foreclosed and hopeless that can result from losing one’s income cannot be overstated. We have heard many times that a head of household has murdered his entire family as a result of overwhelming economic pressure. It is all due to financial disaster that pushed them over the edge. Loss of income and the resulting hardships to the individual and his or her family is the most obvious and direct effect of unemployment. In addition the unemployed person also suffers from lose of self respect and dignity in the society. Education is a key to change and progress, both change and progress go hand in hand, no change no progress. Therefore educational system should be stabilized and changed to prepare the youths according to true values of life and especially to the market demands. All the youths belonging to elites or non elites ought to be prepared in government colleges and universities which will lead the system to reform. Moreover, industrialization should be developed in country that would lead to employment opportunities for the youths by contributing stability to the country.


Nearly 3 million workers have been added to the ranks of the unemployed since October 2008. That number will surely grow in the current economic crisis. It is unfortunate that the unemployed will not be able to get a job right at this moment, but maybe if the the feller higher than me can briefly read my proposal and hear how this has gotten to a point where people are thinking such ways of finding job are ridicules maybe they'll take an action. If the government officials doesn't take action anytime soon the employers, employees and taxpayers will be left paying the bill for higher unemployment insurance costs as a result, and job seekers will suffer longer spells of unemployment. Unemployment is becoming more and more obtuse. The only way to diminish the intensity of unemployment is to encourage the youth towards the welfare of the county. The education system must be reformed up to the level of an underdeveloped country. Agriculturists must be encouraged by the government. We must have a clean and corruption free government. More and more industries must be built to provide much opportunity to the youth. Pakistan is a poor country in regard of industrialization. Therefore industrialization must be given top priority. Youths activities and energies should be directed in a useful channel for the nation’s prosperity. Unemployment is an alarming tone for the survival of the country. Solution to this problem is a must to get the new generation out of the sense of deprivation.