Eden's Guide to Bunburying

I am definitely a Certified Teacher

From The Importance of Being Ernest

Oscar wild wrote the great hit The Importance of Being Earnest in 1895 to great acclaim. It is a hilarious comedy centered around people who decide to create fake personas in order to live life according to their pleasures. In this guide I am going to be leading you down the path that so much of mankind had traveled through. I am going to be teaching you the art of Bunburying.

The different levels of Bunburying

It is important to remember that Bunburying comes in all different shapes and sizes. Anyone can create a fake persona for themselves and anyone can can do it well. It is key to remember that just because you are Bunburying doesn't mean that someone else isn't Bunburying. You must always be on the watch. The person you are "running away" from might actually be doing the same thing to you. This might sound highly improbable but it has happened more than expected. One of the most famous instances is man cheating on his wife with his wife.

Step one: The physical change

Here we have one of my students who has now become a professional Bunburyist and is now transforming themselves into Paula Deen. He has become so good at what he does that he has alluded millions. Here he is in a step by step format of what he does. As you can see, there is a lot of hard work that goes into the physical change. Just changing hair color or adding a fake mustache is not going to cut it. Your chances of getting away with bunburying will be highly improbable. Trust me. I am a professional.

Step Two: Partner in Crime

One of the most fundamental steps that most bunburyists forget is that you need a partner in crime. You need someone who will be there and create an elaborate yet believable lie that will save your butt from your family or even the law. It is very difficult to bunbury if you are by yourself. If you are trying to fool a mass of people and it is not possible for you to get a partner in crime it will considerably lessen your chances of getting away with it.

Even though it is important to have a partner in crime, it is also important that you stay wary of them. One must make sure that their partner in crime is someone that can be trusted and one that will get something in return. Most bunburyist escapades have failed because the partner has ratted them out and broken off the deal. It is also important that you always remember who you have told about your bunburying. If one had forgotten there are obvious dire consequences.

Step 3: Operational facility

One must have an operational facility for their fake personality. If one inquires about your dwelling you must have a reasonable answer that makes sense. This operational facility must also include a separate mail box. This way the "friends" that you have made with your fake personality never come up in your "real" life.

Serious Bunburyist:

  • If you are normally inviting people to your operational facility, make sure that nothing from your real life can be seen. If there is a possibility that they might be seen then always have a good story handy.
  • It is also key to remember not to have any of Bunbury's things in the operational facility since this too arises unwanted questions.

*If your secret identity is a gangster or dangerous criminal then you can do what ever it is that you like when you are in that form.

Step 4: Fool proof plan

This is the last and one of the most important steps in Bunburying. It is essential that you have a reasonable lie that will get you out of any trouble. This lie must be perfectly orchestrated and pre-planned. It must also match up every time that you say it. It is also important that everyone who knows about your bunburying is in to the lie.

Another thing that most people forget about this story is that they create small details that are tough to remember. It is important to orchestrate your story in a way that will make it general and mold able for any and all problems.