amelia valdez

english portfolio

ten rules for my utopian society

  1. there is to be a true freedom of religion, including in that the society is not be primarily based upon one religion in respect to the uncertainty of all religions
  2. people will be paid and rewarded through other means according to their passion and work ethic
  3. there will be no slaughter, testing, or hunting of animals and there will be no instance allowed in which a human may make money off of an animal in a way that requires the animal to do something that it would not other wise do on its own (bees doing their thing and making honey is cool, but you can leave if you want to hook a mechanical milker up to a cow who has zero time for your disgusting nonsense. gurl, bye)
  4. no books or publications are to be banned because how do people not have something better to do than banning books because they're a little girl who's scared that others might use them to enlighten themselves
  5. there will be no favoritism of either gender in courts, workplaces, etc.
  6. in conjunction with rule six, rape will not be treated as a faulty step of the victim due to their choice of clothing or location at the time of the incident, but rather as a moral fault of the suspect. and in relation, abortions are not to be permitted except for in the case of rape (oh no, people have to be held accountable for their choices!1!!)
  7. crimes to nature (what is traditionally considered "nature," humans, animals) will merit the heaviest consequences
  8. no chemicals, dyes, synthetic materials, or other materials not naturally occurring are to be permitted in goods meant for consumption or cosmetic application, even if it costs the company more money
  9. no group of certain sexual identification will be singled out or discriminated against just to appease religious beliefs, socially sensitive people, or any other group wishing to be specially accommodated at the expense of others
  10. I will be the supreme leader of all water supplied to everyone ever and if they act dumb then they're getting cold shower water until they realize how little time people have for their rubbish <3

six word memoir

i fall out of a tree
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a *better* cast for 1984 starring...

Pete Davidson as the painfully awkward main character and anti-hero, Winston Smith. Pete Davidson would be great for this role as he is also painfully awkward, prefers to put as much effort as he possibly can into doing nothing, and has a comical way of almost never knowing what is going on.

Cara Delevigne as Winston's mysteriously pretty and rebellious lover, Julia. Cara Delevigne would be great for this role because she has a mysterious beauty to her that is louder than her underlying rebelliousness.

Ryan Gosling as Big Brother, the mysterious "leader" of Oceania that is never seen in person but adorns every aspect of 1984's watchful society. Ryan Gosling would be great for this role because if everyone ever is going to have to stare at someone's face on everything everywhere they go, they might as well be as good of a view as Ryan Gosling.

Hank Green(bean) as Syme, Winston's suspected rebel coworker who is both great with words and a destroyer of words. Hank Green(bean) would be great for this role because he is great at both creating and destroying one's vocabulary, and he also loves science.

JonTron as O'Brien, the supposed Brotherhood member who really works for the Inner Party. JonTron would be great for this role because nothing says deception and questionability like JonTron.

Donald Trump as the deceptive Mr.Charrington, who does a variety of things to "aid" Winston, only to turn against him by being a member of the Thought Police. Donald Trump would be great for this role because he, too, has a myriad of bad ideas and tactics through which he deeply offends people who somehow did not see them coming.

Kenan Thompson as Parsons, Miss Parsons's fat, bland husband that spends his days at the Ministry of Truth and is the aloof father to two Satan spawns. Kenan Thompson would be great for this role because Parsons is the type of person that you can imagine widening his eyes, looking directly at the camera, and saying "woops" whenever one of his Satan children either literally or metaphorically blows the whole world up, which Kenan Thompson is very good at.

Bill Hader as Emmanuel Goldstein, the mysterious leader of the feared and scandalous Brotherhood, a group notorious for rebelling against the Party. Bill Hader is the only person for this role because he is good at making hissing/splashing/death/bird noises and has experience with wigs with horns attached.

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ideals of freedom

I believe that I have simultaneously many and hardly any freedoms as a citizen in America. I believe that I have many freedoms because I simply do, according to the country and its governmental basis, as my birth under its jurisdiction fortunately entitles me to many freedoms such as that of speech, religion, and many others. However, the reason that I feel that I also have hardly any freedoms is due to society's frequent necessity to shoot down those who want to speak a certain way or practice (or not practice) a religion (you're pretty much singled out in some way if you're anything but Christian or Jewish), and when it really boils down, people navigate their thoughts on you based on what they want you to do. I feel like most of these society-fabricated restrictions on personal freedoms can only affect you if you let them, though, as I very much enjoy my technical freedom of speech and the ability to say things that may offend people (not that I try to, but I can, for instance, explain something touchy to someone and not have to feel bad about it if it offends them) without being shot down by some government force for speaking my mind. (I mean, where would we be without good roasts every once and a while if our speech was monitored down to each word?) In conjunction with this, I feel that power lies in those that are able to know what they want and let others know what they want, so in countries and civilizations in which freedoms are not balanced among citizens, especially those freedoms involving speech and thought, I feel that power is automatically given to those that are allowed to think for themselves and that the hierarchy forms itself from there. However, the power that this top tier gets is often the wrong kind of power when it's gained through oppressing those abilities of others as it eliminates any potential for there to be a healthy diversity of thought.

an alternate ending to chapter (section?) one

(from p.103) He put a cigarette in his mouth. Half the tobacco promptly fell out onto his tongue, a bitter dust which was difficult to spit out again. He was then summoned to the principal's office of his quaint elementary school. Winston Smith was not actually a bland middle aged man of Oceania that smoked cheap cigarettes because he didn't know what else to do with himself, but a child delinquent of the unnecessary state of Ohio and the baddest OG at his school, who smoked Smarties on the playground everyday at recess. The administration wanted this to stop, and the only way to get the job done was to get another student to shame him in his most frequented sport- Foursquare. Principal Eggs hosted a contest that week to see which chosen member of the student body would be the most fit to face the decorated Winston Smith. Little did the administration know, that for Winston, ball was indeed life. The next day at recess, Eggward Breadtoast sleekly slipped on his Nike sweatband, laced up his J's, and downed the last sip of his whey protein smoothie that was guaranteed to supply him the optimal skills to sufficiently pay the bills. He stepped up to his square, knowingly being stared down by Winston and his entourage of Pants Joy and Daquan James. This was his time. The match was an eye-jerking, teeth-gritting blur until Eggward finally dropped his final hat trick of a Cherry Bomb followed by Snake Eyes and a School Bus. After Winston missed the final pass of the ball, Eggward promptly drew a mic from his jeans pocket and dropped it on the court. Pants, Daquan, and all of the prettiest girls from the third grade surrounded Eggward as he victory danced to the latest single off his mixtape and threw hunnas like loose change.