Causes & Reliefs of Stress
How to identify & deal with stress By Sophia Staker
- School, homework, etc
- Family problems, parents divorced...
- Work, boss, etc
- Relationship problems, boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife
- Financial status
- Gained one or more new family members (birth, marriage, etc)
How are these stressors?
- School/homework can be a stress to your life because you have to worry about doing the work constantly. So if you have sports or you may just want to spend time with family you have to worry about doing the work and it can stress you out.
- Family problems/parents divorced, etc can be a stress to your life because you might have to go back and forth to your parents houses and it may be a lot of work having to deal with it. Also if you have other family members living in your house like a Grandparent then you have to worry about taking care of them as well.
- Work, boss, etc can stress you out if they have high standards that you must meet. You might have a small amount of time to do something. It can stress you out.
- Relationships can stress out your life because if you have a boy/girlfriend or husband/wife you have to worry about what they are doing or what time they may be home from work. You also should worry about spending time with them and making sure you both are happy.
- Financial status can stress you out because if you don't make a lot of money then you must make sure your family has food and clothing. It can stress you out because you might work over time.
- Gained a new family member can cause stress because you might be an only child and you now have a brother or sister and it can be hard for you to adjust to a new life.
How to deal with some of these stresses.
- "Chunking" out or managing your time. Split the times you do your homework. Do a little bit of homework maybe before and after your extra activities whether its sports or clubs.
- If you are in a club and a sport, you may consider taking a break from one until you get to a non-stressful mental state with your work.
- If you tend to maybe be tired after school and that's why you cant manage your time, then when you get home take about a 30 minute break from work. It will refresh your brain and you may feel more motivated to do your homework.
Family problems can also be stressful, a few ways to handle the stress are...
- Talking to a parent or a trusted adult and get your emotions out about how you feel on the situation.
- Try and find a way to resolve what may be going on. Like if you and your dad don't get along, then maybe try talking to him.
- If you and your family just aren't spending time together, then you can try and get them to do something together like a family game night, etc.
Relationships are sometimes very hard to deal with. A few ways to deal with the stress are...
- If you are fighting with your partner, then talk to them. Are you even fighting over something that is a big deal?
- Spend time with them. If you don't see them for very long through out the week because of work maybe try and take them lunch one day or eat dinner with them to catch up.
- If you both aren't happy in the relationship, you may have to let go. Usually the goal in a relationship is for both people to be happy.
Your financial status can be very hard to control and may cause lot's of stress on your life, if so then a few ways to cope are...
- If you and your family go out to eat every week, take a break to catch up on a few extra dollars for something like bills.
- If your hours don't pay well, you may consider switching jobs, which can be hard but also have many benefits.
- Keeping a "goal jar" and putting extra money in when you can. It can help with emergencies and help you know that you'll always have spare money in case.
Gaining a new family member can be very hard, I've dealt with this a few ways...
- Spend time with them. Get to know them better.
- Don't ignore the fact that they are there, they may be in your life forever so create a bond.
- Understand why and how they came into your life. If your mom got married to her boyfriend, then understand that your mother is happy and you should make the best of it.
- Homework and school
- My new step sisters
- My parents being divorced
- My depression
- My friends
How are these stressors to my own life?
- I have a family I'd love to spend time with, but I always have to worry about doing my homework and making sure I have good grades.
- I have to make sure I'm to school on time. I can't oversleep or miss my ride.
- I must have good grades because my mother has high standards for me.
- I have to always have my work done and be to class on time, so I have to worry about rushing to the restroom before class.
- I have depression, so sometimes I don't feel motivated to do any work and I have to get it done.
My new step sisters are a stress to my life because...
- I have to live with them & I barely got to meet them before they moved in with my dad and us & his girlfriend.
- They have completely different personalities than me, so I stress that we won't get along and agree on things.
- They are older than me, so I often think of myself as annoying to them because I'm younger.
- They are kind of like my dad's kids and it stresses me out that he will like them more than me even though I know it wont happen.
- They also have to go to their dad's house, so I never really know when they will be at my dad's house when I'm there.
My parents being divorced stresses me out because...
- I have to go back and forth between their houses and it's hard leaving one parent when I have to go with the other.
- I have to come home from school and worry about getting everything I need to go to my dad's house some days and sometimes I forget things.
- I don't really get to spend a lot of time with either of my parents during the week because of homework and school, so when the weekends come around i feel pressured to stay at home with them and not hang out with friends.
- They fight sometimes and it is hard on me to see them fight the way they do because it over petty things and my siblings and I sometimes get caught in the middle of it.
- They parent in two completely different ways, so i can't adjust to just one way of discipline and chores and things like that.
My depression stresses me out because...
- I am not always happy and people ask me why and I never want to tell them so I hide it.
- I have to worry about therapy and beginning it soon.
- I want to be social, but sometimes my depression gets in the way of it because I sometimes don't feel motivated to go anywhere.
- My depression makes it 10 times harder for me to focus on school. I have a hard time remembering things from even the day before.
- I want to help myself but I sometimes find myself in situations where I am confused or I don't know how to.
My friends stress out my life because...
- They always want to hang out and sometimes i can't because of my parent's schedule.
- My depression makes it so I just want to be antisocial and sometimes they don't accept it or they get annoyed.
- They will sometimes get into drama and drag me into it and i don't know how to get out of it sometimes.
- They don't leave me alone when I say I want to be alone or I'm in a bad mood.
- They always expect me to do things that cost money and I sometimes am not allowed to go because my parents just don't have the money at the time and then they get annoyed.
Solutions to my stresses
Step Sisters- I can get to know them better. They can drive, so I could go somewhere with them one day like the mall and just spend time with them.
Divorced parents- I can start getting my things together for my dad's in the morning so I don't stress about it after school.
Depression- I can go on walks, or write and do simple things that help with depression effecting my everyday life as much as possible.
Friends- I can tell them no if I am not in the mood to hang out, I also can ignore the drama they drag me into.
Stress relieving activities
- Taking walks: Being out in the fresh air will help relieve stress and clear your mind.
- Writing: Writing can help you get your emotions out onto paper if you can't speak them.
- Talking to someone you trust: If you tell someone about how you feel and get it all out, you will "life a weight from your shoulders" and feel better.
- Take a hot shower or bath: You can clear your mind and feel clean and fresh. It helps.
- Physically exercise: Maybe try yoga or a fitness class a few times a week or month. Feeling better and looking better can help with stress.
Why do you want to learn about stress?
- It's important to identify and figure out your stressors. You can find a way to help them and make them better if you know how to identify and tell what your stressors are in your life.
- Stress can cause to many different changes in your life and it's important to know why somethings stress you out.
- You may be doing things in your life that stress you out and you don't even know it. You want to find these things out and get help or change the way you are doing it.
- Stress can be good and bad, you want to learn about the things that cause more good stress rather than bad stress. You want to keep your life filled with positive stresses and not negative ones.
- Being too stressed out with negative stresses can cause things like depression, so if you catch your stressors early, you will be able to make sure you don't develop illnesses like depression that can effect your life for a long time.