Bunburying: A guide

By Sam Kinnett

Where did it come from?


The famous author and playwright Oscar Wilde created this positively spectacular verb in one of his famous plays The Importance of being Earnest.

What does it mean to Bunbury?

If you were to go out on a Bunbury you would be changing yourself into a new identity.

This new identity usually consists of a changed name, new haircut/mustache, different attire, etc.

Why would you want to Bunbury?

Lead a better life!

If you could just Bunbury and go party for a week would you say no?

If you said yes then you're smart!

If you said no then rethink your opinion.

Get away from home!

Life got you down? Is work a drag everyday? Are you about to go mad with all of the chores you need to do? The only solution you have is to Bunbury! Imagine, sitting on the beach with a mimosa in your hand. Not a care in the world!

Retirements!

What do you need to become a Bunburyist?

Some of the things that you MUST have are:

1. Fake Identity

2. Obscure relative

3. New attire

4. Intuition

5. Confidence

Category 1

Identity


Fake Name


Wig/Mustache

Category 2

Family/Story

Obscure relative


Obscure friend


Old friend


(Any reason to get you out of town)

Category 3

Money/Smarts

New Clothes


Wig/Mustache (These can be expensive)


Intuition


Good at lying

What could go wrong?

As any good Bunburyist knows getting caught whilst Bunburying is the worst thing that could ever happen! If you parents, or any relatives of that manner, found out that you had a fake identity... things would be quite sour. Entire families could be ripped apart, especially if you had another special someone in your second life.

How to protect yourself?

How to change your looks

If you are ever in a situation where your Identity could be threatened, there are some very exquisite options you can take to protect yourself. More times than not someone is recognized while Bunburying. Most of the time people are recognized by their eyes. Pop on some sunglasses and it's 100% harder to recognize someone, especially at a distance.

If you have no access to sunglasses, eye colored contacts work wonders. If you get recognized and someone asks you if you are so and so, just play dumb and act like you have no idea who they are. When they see you as the real you, they will see your real eye color, and all doubt will be gone from your mind. Lastly, if you are in a situation where all options are irrelevant the only good thing to do is run. The person could still be suspicious, but if you are smart, and play dumb the next time you're seen, i'm sure you can get yourself out of it.

Final Notes

Don't forget!

Bunburying is a very strange subject. It is good, and it is bad. Only Bunbury if you need it. If you've read The Importance of being Earnest then you will see how bad it can turn out.


Good luck with your travels and long live Oscar Wilde!