State Testing
Protocol for Testing during Severe Weather
Parody Protocol
1. Should a severe weather situation occur during testing, please remain
calm. To display any kind of anxiety would be a testing irregularity and
must be reported.
2. Please do not look out the window to watch for approaching tornadoes.
You must monitor the students at all times. To do otherwise would be a
testing irregularity and must be reported.
3. Should students notice an approaching tornado and begin to cry, please
make every effort to protect their testing materials from the flow of
tears and sinus drainage.
4. Should a flying object come through your window during testing, please
make every effort to ensure that it does not land on a testing booklet or
an answer sheet. Please make sure to soften the landing of the flying
object so that it will not disturb the students while testing.
5. Should shards of glass from a broken window come flying into the room,
have the students use their bodies to shield their testing materials so
that they will not be damaged. Have plenty of gauze on hand to ensure that
no one accidentally bleeds on the answer documents. Damaged answer sheets
will not scan properly.
6. Should gale force winds ensue, please have everyone stuff their test
booklets and answer sheets into their shirts, being very careful not to
bend them. Bent answer documents will not scan properly.
7. If any student gets sucked into the vortex of the funnel cloud, please
make sure they mark at least one answer before departing. Make sure they
leave their answer sheets and test booklets behind. You will have to
account for those.
8. Should a funnel cloud pick up you, the test administrator, and take you
flying over the rainbow, you will still be required to account for all of
your testing materials when you land. Please take extra precautions.
Remember, once you have checked them out, test materials should never
leave your supervision.
9. When rescue workers arrive to dig you out of the rubble, please make
sure that they do not, at any time, look at or handle the testing
materials. Once you have been treated for your injuries, you will still be
responsible for checking your materials back in. Search dogs will not be
allowed to sift through the rubble for lost tests unless they have been
through standardized test training.
calm. To display any kind of anxiety would be a testing irregularity and
must be reported.
2. Please do not look out the window to watch for approaching tornadoes.
You must monitor the students at all times. To do otherwise would be a
testing irregularity and must be reported.
3. Should students notice an approaching tornado and begin to cry, please
make every effort to protect their testing materials from the flow of
tears and sinus drainage.
4. Should a flying object come through your window during testing, please
make every effort to ensure that it does not land on a testing booklet or
an answer sheet. Please make sure to soften the landing of the flying
object so that it will not disturb the students while testing.
5. Should shards of glass from a broken window come flying into the room,
have the students use their bodies to shield their testing materials so
that they will not be damaged. Have plenty of gauze on hand to ensure that
no one accidentally bleeds on the answer documents. Damaged answer sheets
will not scan properly.
6. Should gale force winds ensue, please have everyone stuff their test
booklets and answer sheets into their shirts, being very careful not to
bend them. Bent answer documents will not scan properly.
7. If any student gets sucked into the vortex of the funnel cloud, please
make sure they mark at least one answer before departing. Make sure they
leave their answer sheets and test booklets behind. You will have to
account for those.
8. Should a funnel cloud pick up you, the test administrator, and take you
flying over the rainbow, you will still be required to account for all of
your testing materials when you land. Please take extra precautions.
Remember, once you have checked them out, test materials should never
leave your supervision.
9. When rescue workers arrive to dig you out of the rubble, please make
sure that they do not, at any time, look at or handle the testing
materials. Once you have been treated for your injuries, you will still be
responsible for checking your materials back in. Search dogs will not be
allowed to sift through the rubble for lost tests unless they have been
through standardized test training.
“jen12.” A To Z Teacher Stuff Forums, forums.atozteacherstuff.com/index.php?threads/testing-jokes.138006/.