Getting Comfortable With Failure
Marvel Studios Head Kevin Feige gave an important message about failure during his University of Southern California commencement address last week.
Kevin Feige had achieved his dream.
He had been accepted to the University of Southern California — and now he was going to follow in the footsteps of his idols like George Lucas and Ron Howard.
But what ensued weren’t crucial strategies and frameworks to write the next Star Wars or E.T. — but repeated failure and disappointment.
Feige may have been a USC student, but he was rejected from the university’s esteemed School of Cinematic Arts — five different times — a period of anguish that left him questioning his purpose and capabilities.
“It turned out the sixth time was the charm,” he said.
Feige now serves as the president of Marvel Studios — but it was the sting of disappointment and the lessons from it nearly 30 years ago that he highlighted during his commencement speech before 20,000 students at his alma mater last week.
“My wish for you, graduates, is that you get comfortable with failure, rejection,” he said. “Accept that it’s a possibility, but never let it define you, and never let it hold you back.”
It’s an important lesson and a pivotal reminder.
Many of us as leaders pre-write the script to our seasons, our business cycles, our relationships. We get an opportunity, formulate a plan and do our best to carry out our visions that we feel are unique and destined for success.
Then, adversity arises — and we simply don’t know what to do.
What distinguished Feige wasn’t that he avoided obstacles, but that he kept working and pursuing his vision despite countless setbacks.
After graduating from USC, he didn’t land his dream job and launch a successful career right off the bat.
He instead began as an entry-level production assistant picking up lunch orders, washing cars, walking dogs and chauffeuring executives around Los Angeles.
What set Feige up for long-term success was:
1. He never grew overly cynical about his hardships
2. He was always humble enough to do grunt work
3. He recognized there’d be detours along the way
“Very rarely is film making the result of divine stroke of inspiration,” he said. “It’s about grinding it out, banging your head against the wall with a group of collaborators, taking something from bad to O.K. to good to maybe great to maybe something people will want to watch again and again.”
Whether we’re currently struggling to process failure or are trying to navigate some other adversity we endured at some point, we may want to draw from Feige’s story.
The most successful among us aren’t the people who dodged setbacks and disappointment or figured it out immediately.
They’re the ones who faced hardship — but refused to be overcome by it.
QUESTION: How can we as parents and educators help young people embrace failure as an opportunity to "fail forward", rather than a time to quit?
