Teen Dating Violence

By Darien Di Naro

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What is Teen Dating Violence?

Teen Dating Violence is defined as a pattern of controlling, aggressive, and abusive behaviors over another person within a romantic relationship. Despite being defined as a "pattern", you can stop and help others stop teen dating violence before it becomes a pattern.

Why We Learn Now

- More than 1 in 10 teenagers experience physical violence in their relationship

- 1 in 4 teens report experiencing some form of abuse

- About 70% of college students say they have been sexually coerced (threatened)

- Only 33% of teens in a violent relationship tell someone

- Half of youths who have been victims of dating violence and/or rape attempt suicide

- Females between the ages of 16-24 are about three times more likely to be abused by an intimate partner.

- 72% of 13 and 14 year-olds are "dating"

Types of Abuse in a Relationship

Verbal- Verbal abuse is when the abuser in the relationship insults, humiliates, makes fun of, or ridicules the target. This form of abuse also includes when you are commanded to dress or act a way you normally wouldn't.


Emotional- Emotional abuse may include verbal abuse. The abuser often makes the target feel bad about his or herself. In addition, the abuser may try to manipulate or control the target's emotions to get them to do what they want.


Physical- One of the most obvious forms of abuse, physical abuse is when your partner physically hurts you. This includes hitting, pulling your hair, and throwing things. Even if you do not feel pain from this, physical abuse is unacceptable.


Sexual- Sexual abuse in a relationship is when you perform sexual activity against your own will. This includes rape, being pressured into sex, and violence during sexual activity.


Financial- Financial abuse is when your partner forces and pressures you into paying the bill for them, and giving them your money to spend.

Why do People Abuse?

Abuse in a relationship begins and continues for many reasons. People may abuse because:

- They believe their behavior is normal, or that is just their personality

- They feel the need to be in control of another person

- They do not know how to control or express their anger other than by violence

- They may be under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol

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WARNING!

When in a violent relationship, you may not be able to recognize the abuse. Luckily, there are many warning signs that you are in an abusive relationship. Some of these warning signs are;

1. Your partner tries to control the way you dress, and act.

2. Your partner declares you as his/her own, and says you belong to him/her

3. Your partner must know where you are, what you are doing, and who you are with at all times

4. Your partner makes suggestions about how you could improve yourself ( "You could lose some weight!" or "Why don't you wear something better looking than that?" are just a few examples)

5. Your partner threatens to commit suicide if you do not do what they want

6. Your partner loses their temper at you very easily.

7. Your partner screams/ yells loudly in your face

8. Your partner hurts you in any way


If you are notice any of these things in your relationship, find a trusted adult or friend and do what you can to get out of the relationship.

Healthy vs. Unhealthy

There are many differences between healthy and unhealthy relationships.


Unhealthy Relationship- In an unhealthy relationship, there may be a lack of trust, respect, honesty, personal connection, and there is no mutual enjoyment. Additionally, you may feel pressure, uncomfortable, lack of privacy, unhappy, and you may feel that you are not in control of not only the relationship but your life as well.


Healthy Relationship- In a healthy relationship, two people develop a close connection on a personal level. There is a strong bond built on an abundance of honesty, trust, respect, equality, communication, and the ability to have fun with each other. A healthy relationship should bring happiness, not stress, into your life. While in a healthy relationship there should be no fear of violence, no feeling of insecurity, and no lack of privacy if that is what you want.

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What to Do if You are In an Unhealthy Relationship

If you find yourself in an unhealthy and abusive relationship, try to get out of that relationship as fast as possible. Find a friend, trusted adult, parent, or even guidance counselor to help you. Along with support from the people you know, you can also go to these websites for help.
Love Is... A Teen Dating Violence Prevention PSA

Works Cited


"11 Facts About Teen Dating Violence." Do Something. N.p., n.d. Web. 03 Feb. 2014.

"Dating Abuse Statistics." Www.loveisrespect.org. N.p., n.d. Web. 03 Feb. 2014.

"Healthy Relationships vs. Unhealthy Relationships." Subscribe to DPD. N.p., 04 May 2010. Web. 05 Feb. 2014.

"Quick Links:." Facts about Teen Dating Violence. N.p., n.d. Web. 03 Feb. 2014.

"Types of Abuse." Www.loveisrespect.org. N.p., n.d. Web. 05 Feb. 2014.

"Warning Signs: Are You in an Abusive Relationship?" Do Something. N.p., n.d. Web. 05 Feb. 2014.