Hotness in a can!
If you are ugly and poor! Only $1.99!
Hey there fugly nerds!
Do you repel babes like rotten burgers? Are you broke and living in your mom's closet? Don't fret! With the new hotness in a can you can have affordable beauty in just minutes! Approved by the "official" corporation of abused dogs so there is no need for worry! Quality guaranteed or your money back! (Most of the time) Hop on your trike and buy a can in the nearest dark sketchy alley!