Electromagnetic Industries Co.
Proprietors: Max Kirking and Nick Meszaros
100 Years of Innovation
Our State of the Art Products
NEW!!! Personal Aurora Borealis
Have you ever experienced or want to experience the Northern Lights but live too far South? Well that problem that has faced the entire world is now fixed! Electromagnetic Industries Co. is now proud to offer Personal Aurora Borealis! This new product has been developed by our very own scientists especially for you! With the new technological advances in the electromagnetic field, our scientists have discovered a way to capture the Aurora Borealis for personal use! By using a tiny machine that replicates the solar wind interacting with Earth's electromagnetic field and projects this interaction in the air, you too now can now view the Northern Lights from your own house, and even in your own room! This product can be used as a night light for kids, an source of beauty for parties, or just for personal pleasure! So, for just $1999.99 you too can view the Northern Lights no matter where you are and wow all of your friends!
Top of the Line Laptops
Normal laptops use electric forces to quickly process information and to carry out functions through the use of microchips carefully embedded with a series of complex circuits, made primarily of copper, which serves as an excellent conductor. However, our newly created laptops have a micro-electromagnetic field embedded in the microchip that allows for the fastest computer processing in the world. This electromagnetic field embedded in the chip excites the electrons in the processor, thus speeding up processing ability. This newly produced product is a steal at $7,999.99! Get yours before the popularity booms!
High Tech Microphones
Our superior microphones feature new high strength, low weight micro magnets that increase the magnitude of the tiny magnetic field located within the head of the microphone. This creates clearer and louder amplifications of generated noise, by stabilizing the sound waves that are generated by the diaphragm vibrations within the head of the microphone. Retailing at only $39.99 this microphone is not only an economical choice, but also a top rated product by the NMA ( National Musical Association) for four straight years.
Premium Credit Cards
A common problem associated with credit cards/ identification codes in general is the demagnetization of the magnetic strips when a strong magnet is located nearby. This can cause severe problems for businesses and consumers alike. Luckily the scientists at Electromagnetic CO. are the savior’s for this problem! Thanks to a micro electromagnetic field that encloses the card, it is now virtually impossible for magnets to demagnetize the magnetic strip! No longer will credit cards fail to read, or ID’s fail to function. Order 500 of these cards for your business at the modest price of $399.99 ( for a box of 500) and receive 250 cards free! WHAT A STEAL!
Salon Approved Hair Dryers
Revolutionary new technology has been developed by our hard working scientists that allows for less wattage to be used to heat up the central heating coil that is responsible for converting electrical energy into heat energy. This is made possible by new ultra-resistors that replace common industry resistors. When electricity passes through the new ultra resistor the electricity must do lots of work to complete the inner circuit. Some of the energy is then lost to heat that is desired to dry hair. The new ultra resistors are also guaranteed to never overheat thanks to the implementation Electromagnetic CO.’s EMC Safety System. This state of the art product is available for only $29.99!
Nationally Recognized MRI Machines
Our continued excellence in the manufacturing MRI’s has continued in the introduction of a completely revamped unit in 2013! Feature stronger Primary Magnets that generate magnetic fields are perfect magnitude ( required for the image scan), easy to adjust gradient magnets ( responsible for getting image scans on a precise body part) and, finally new coils that can interpret the collected data and produce clear than ever images! This easy to assemble unit will only cost $500 million and if you order online, shipping is free!
Seamen Worthy Compasses
Thanks to recent electromagnetic induction technological breakthroughs, our scientists have developed an immaculately accurate compass needles that are guaranteed to accurately point north forever. A new process is capable of calibrating the needles to correctly match Earth’s ever changing magnetic field and always point north, even when within the presence of other strong magnetic forces which often skew compass needles. In fact we are so confident in the reliability of our compasses that we tested then in the middle of the Bermuda Triangle and were successfully able to navigate back to port with no undesirable compass readings! You too can become the envy of all your friends, by owning the ultimate tool of navigation for the unbelievable price of only $89.99! Purchase online and receive a free map during the month of May! Act fast, as supplies are limited!
sCrap Yard Magnets
Our Scrap metal magnets are actually electron magnets, that when provided with a strong electrical current, create a electromagnetic field of high intensity that instantly attracts any magnetic material to it. To prevent catastrophes our scientists have insulated the outside of the electron magnet with thick heat resistant rubber, certified with our EMC Safety Guarantee. This insulated rubber also directs the magnetic force downward onto the desired object for maximum lift strength and attraction! Order our industrial strength scrap metal electron magnets for $99.99 each or a set of 3 for $249.99. For each purchase you are also granted one raffle ticket for a chance to win a crane.*
Building Code Approved Outlets
In the past, electrical outlets have emitted small amounts of electromagnetic fields both when current is flowing and when current is not flowing. However, that was simply the past, as the engineers here at Electromagnetic Industries Co. have actually made a startling discovery--a way to capture this field and store it for future use! This captured electromagnetic field can actually be sold to major retailers (like us)! Not only will your electric outlets stop emitting electromagnetic fields, but they will also provide a cheap source of revenue for you! So for just $299.99, you can own the newest form of electric outlets! And as we say with this product "Make money even as the electricity bill rises!"**
Great New Location!
Email: allyourneeds@electromagneticness.com
Website: www.smore.com/rsdv
Location: Behind Home Depot, Round Rock, TX
Phone: (512)777-7777
Facebook: facebook.com/electromagnetics
Twitter: @electromagnetic_co
Reviews
Hans- "The Personal Northern Lights was the best investment of my life! I live by the equator and with the power to have the Northern Lights at the tip of my fingers, I'm pullin' all the babes ;) "
Taylor Swift- "I buy all of my musical equipment from Electromagnetic Industries Co., top of their microphones are the best out there and I refuse to use microphones from anyone else!"
Capt. Jack Sparrow- "Last year I upgraded my compass from the old nasty one I usually use, to the state-of-the-art compasses produced my Electromagnetic Industries Co. These compasses are proudly endorsed by me, and if you think that's not important, 'You forgot one important thing... I'm Captain Jack Sparrow.'"
**actual amount of electromagnetic field may vary. likely amount captured is very small. going price of electromagnetic field is $0.10 per full electric outlet storage. full storage takes approximately 1 year